Southerly by David Haywood

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Southerly: Gerry Brownlee: “I Like To Knock Cats Off Tables”

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  • Aidan,

    And I thought I was being brave giving my (then) 5 year old a saw. Ha! I am a lightweight. I don't think it has entered his head to ask for a nailgun. I will make sure he never sees this video.

    Canberra, Australia • Since Feb 2007 • 147 posts Report Reply

  • David Hood,

    My cat likes to sit on tables

    The MP for Ilam would like to stike 'em
    But my cat likes to sit on tables

    The council in Selwyn is actually quite welcome
    The MP for Ilam would like to stike 'em
    But my cat likes to sit on tables

    Dunedin • Since May 2007 • 875 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen, in reply to David Hood,

    Are you starting a public address song?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3342 posts Report Reply

  • David Hood, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    It was more that, in reading the column, the children's book "My cat likes to hide in boxes" inserted itself into my brain.

    Dunedin • Since May 2007 • 875 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    I now have visions of Gerry Brownlee with a Nailgun. Feel the fear!!!!

    The wireless north ;-) • Since Dec 2006 • 4802 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown, in reply to Tom Beard,

    Oh is that what a Paslode is?! I just thought it was the name of a band.

    It is. You're just not cool enough to have heard them.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 18836 posts Report Reply

  • Richard Stewart,

    Every boy needs a nail gun

    Pt Chev • Since Feb 2012 • 51 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Beard, in reply to Russell Brown,

    You're just not cool enough to have heard them.

    Touché. I've only ever seen their name on posters, though I think it was "Paselode". I always got the impression that they were a bit rock-ish for my tastes.

    On the other hand, I'm glad to say that I've never seen a Paslode. It is obvious that our social spheres have been widely different.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1039 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Unfortunately most google results for "X with nailgun" (kid, cat, et cetera) result in either tragedy or horror. I do love me a nailgun though, with adequate eye and hearing protection.

    I'm also very happy when I see pictures of my two year old nephew trying to drive a digger. Thankfully he has not yet been given the keys.

    The People's Republic of … • Since Nov 2006 • 2132 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    WHAT!!

    Nail gun? Nail gun??

    Where's my fucking hammer!!!!


    Edit:

    Unfortunately most google results for "X with nailgun" (kid, cat, et cetera) result in either tragedy or horror.

    Use the nail gun to keep the cat on the table. Then you can take your time to kick it off.

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1495 posts Report Reply

  • Hebe,

    Good to read the Hay/wood house experience is moving along. I have been beaming positivities your way.

    WHAT!!
    Nail gun? Nail gun??
    Where’s my fucking hammer!!!!

    My Dad could hammer in a four-inch nail with one tap to seat it in then three whacks (two and it wouldn’t necessarily go in straight). No nail-gun. One reason why I loved him.

    Use the nail gun to keep the cat on the table.

    Or give one nail gun to Bob and one to the cat.

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2602 posts Report Reply

  • Hilary Stace,

    What is it about (some) men and power tools? Nail guns and chain saws and other noisy dangerous things are items I never want to be anywhere near. Do you have to have a certain level of testosterone to find them attractive? Is it nature or nurture?

    Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Michael PlaysBass,

    Great post Mr Haywood. Try messing with our cat and you will experience the definitive feline claws & teeth defence - at 17 years old her teeth may be too blunt to pierce skin, but the claws are sharp as ever.

    We have family suffering in quake-damaged home in Chch with no end in sight - while the mould & asbestos spread. Glad to hear you are making progress.

    Surely we must have a PAS reader who is an optometrist who can make a house call to CHCH?

    I am married to one of the very few mobile optometrists (http:\\www.moniqueclinique.com), who would visit Chch except currently on maternity leave. I asked on your behalf, and she says you could get an improvement by massaging the muscles in your neck - particularly the sides - and around the forehead. If you can find a trigger point therapist, that would be ideal. Also try placing the palms of your clean hands over the eyes for several minutes ( put the nail gun down! ) - this is for mild heat - then rolling the eyes. If still "bung", do find a good optometrist (hint: concerned with your welfare not just flogging you some glasses). Good luck!

    Th' Shore (North) • Since Nov 2012 • 4 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca, in reply to Hilary Stace,

    I ….like …. nail guns and chainsaws. :). Hey if I got too much testosterone, I don’t mind it at all so no its not just about men, it never is.
    Nail guns and chainsaws are really creative.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6106 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie, in reply to Sofie Bribiesca,

    Nail guns and chainsaws are really creative.

    Reckon?
    Maybe this belongs over in Capture, but:
    Hammerforum.com:
    "for the several people who suggested nail guns should be included in the discussion, that wouldn’t work because . . . .
    . . . . wait for it . . .
    this forum doesn’t discuss point and shoots."

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 3458 posts Report Reply

  • Nora Leggs, in reply to Joe Wylie,

    Maybe this belongs over in Capture, but:
    Hammerforum.com:

    chuckle.

    thank goodness Capture is an equal opportunities blog!

    Auckland • Since Dec 2011 • 2245 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca, in reply to Joe Wylie,

    Reckon?

    Reckon ;) I've just seen a stapler I want. And its just like a hammer.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6106 posts Report Reply

  • Hilary Stace, in reply to Sofie Bribiesca,

    I suspected it was something to do with creativity. I just prefer gentler, quieter implements.

    Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Hebe, in reply to Hilary Stace,

    Nail guns and chain saws and other noisy dangerous things are items I never want to be anywhere near. Do you have to have a certain level of testosterone to find them attractive? Is it nature or nurture?

    I have a great love of sabre-saws; and I admire those who can handle a chainsaw with ease, and a post-hole digger. Maybe it's from growing up on the dams: as a pre-schooler I would take my dolls out to watch my sandpit full of Euclids, scrapers and other earth-moving machinery create dams, spillways and penstocks.

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2602 posts Report Reply

  • Geoff Lealand,

    David; Drove through Dunsandel twice today and thought of you. A trip to Timaru, to record the memories of Shirley Piddington about her role in the Christchurch and Auckland Shirley Temple 'double' competitions in 1935. A great old lady. Visiting Betty,who won the Christchurch competition , tomorrow,

    Nary a mention of nailguns!

    Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2307 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Brown,

    Dont knock nailguns. Nearly all the old builders I know have tendonitis in the wrist and elbows. They wish the nailguns had been around years ago.

    Piha • Since Nov 2006 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Nearly all the old builders I know have tendonitis in the wrist and elbows. They wish the nailguns had been around years ago.

    Stop hammertime.

    The People's Republic of … • Since Nov 2006 • 2132 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    Attachment

    Dont knock nailguns. Nearly all the old builders I know have tendonitis in the wrist and elbows. They wish the nailguns had been around years ago.

    Yes. Plus, just to show how a nail gun and a chainsaw can be creative…… Poles and wood. No way I’d be up there without the gun.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6106 posts Report Reply

  • Hebe, in reply to Sofie Bribiesca,

    Poles and wood.

    Going up!

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2602 posts Report Reply

  • Hebe, in reply to Paul Brown,

    Dont knock nailguns. Nearly all the old builders I know have tendonitis in the wrist and elbows. They wish the nailguns had been around years ago.

    Or curled up fingers where the tendons in the fingers tighten so much the fingers curl up of the palm. Dad had two fingers amputated because of that.

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2602 posts Report Reply

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