Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Does My Mortgage Look Like a Slag in This?

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  • Danielle,

    Word UP. (My red codpiece of 80s funk salutes you.)

    It's also pretty demeaning to blokes, as if they are Incapable! of Restraining! Themselves! due to their animalistic penis-brains. Erm, no.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3623 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Is this what the women's movement was fighting for? The right to get wasted on equal terms with men?

    Yes? Or put another way: The women's movement most definitely was fighting for women to have the freedom to take risks, fuck up, and even behave badly on equal terms with men. At least, I hope it was.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11784 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    My first thought on seeing that paragraph yesterday (well maybe my second thought if you count spluttering expletives) was "Emma's going to post angry".

    Women get some pretty mixed messages about what is acceptable dress -you are expected to dress "nicely" and "accentuate your assets" and also "not put it all on display" all in garments largely designed for those devoid of hip and bust.

    I largely buy the listener because I can't be arsed figuring out which day the paper publishes TV listing. Oh and Diana Wichtel.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 703 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    It's also pretty demeaning to blokes, as if they are Incapable! of Restraining! Themselves! due to their animalistic penis-brains. Erm, no.

    My animalistic penis-brain would find even Emma's awesome French Whore Top eminently resistible. Then again, my APB gets cranky if it's out too late and finds loud noises and crowds frightening. When did I get so old...

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11784 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    You write such great headlines when you're angry.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 18513 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    My first thought on seeing that paragraph yesterday (well maybe my second thought if you count spluttering expletives) was "Emma's going to post angry".

    You should have seen it, I was actually completely speechless.

    It's also pretty demeaning to blokes, as if they are Incapable! of Restraining! Themselves! due to their animalistic penis-brains. Erm, no.

    Oh, Word. I don't think anyone's ever made an arse of themselves to me in public without one of my male friends telling him he was being a cock. While of course simultaenously respecting my ability to take care of myself.

    From my experience, they should be telling women that if they don't want 'unwanted male attention', they shouldn 't go out wearing geek t-shirts.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4328 posts Report Reply

  • Tess Rooney,

    I only realised how wonderful and safe our university social group was as I have gotten older and seen a wider slice of life. Women could dress as they chose and if there was unwanted attention it was stomped on hard and fast. The fault of unwanted attention is soley on the person giving it.

    Since May 2009 • 256 posts Report Reply

  • Robyn Gallagher,

    You can get unwanted attention wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Even in the midst of the '90s, when it was all baggy and grungy, there was still unwanted attention.

    Also, this famous scene from Body Heat:

    Ned (William Hurt): Maybe you shouldn't dress like that.
    Matty (Kathleen Turner): This is a blouse and a skirt. I don't know what you're talking about.

    Raglan • Since Nov 2006 • 1843 posts Report Reply

  • Steve Barnes,

    I am surprised that Women are allowed to dress up like bordello cushions in Parliament whilst the blokes have to wear a collar and lead.

    The wireless north ;-) • Since Dec 2006 • 4613 posts Report Reply

  • Tess Rooney,

    Craig: I don't like late nights, loud noise or big crowds either, does this mean I have an APB?

    Since May 2009 • 256 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    (I've created a phrase worthy of an acronym! I feel so proud.)

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3623 posts Report Reply

  • philipmatthews,

    (I've created a phrase worthy of an acronym! I feel so proud.)

    Next time the cops put out an All Points Bulletin there might be some confusion.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 642 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I’m also really impressed with this woman’s chest, both up-thrust and barely-clad. Obviously she has an invisible push-up bra, which is awesome.

    (My French Whore Top is awesome.)

    At which point are we being serious, or am I missing something? Aw TITS

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 5924 posts Report Reply

  • Tess Rooney,

    "Ahhh, we've got an APB out of control down on the Strip. Could all local units attend."

    "Dear God! Not another out of control penis brain running amok. I bet it was that Hart woman's mortgage falling out of it's dress again. Those liquored up investment portfolios can't keep their greasy hands to themselves."

    Since May 2009 • 256 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    You write such great headlines when you're angry.

    <embarassed>Um, I don't get it.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2081 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    At which point are we being serious, or am I missing something? Aw TITS

    Ah, you assume even I know any more.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4328 posts Report Reply

  • James Butler,

    <embarassed>Um, I don't get it.

    Don't worry, it just means you're immune to The Listener

    Auckland • Since Jan 2009 • 799 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    You write such great headlines when you're angry.

    <embarassed>Um, I don't get it.

    It's a tribute to Finlay Macdonald's wonderful quip about the ultimate contemporary Listener cover line being 'Will your mortgage make you fat?'

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 18513 posts Report Reply

  • James Butler,

    I largely buy the listener because I can't be arsed figuring out which day the paper publishes TV listing

    The downturn of The Listener had an upside for me - when I stopped buying it, I also stopped watching TV, because I never knew when anything was on. Brilliant!

    Auckland • Since Jan 2009 • 799 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    It's a running joke in our household that every week one of us will ask "what's in the Listener this week?" and the other will reply "middle-class panic".

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 703 posts Report Reply

  • Tess Rooney,

    Oh, I thought it was about her assets.

    Since May 2009 • 256 posts Report Reply

  • Tess Rooney,

    My favorite Listener article was about the new poverty of the middle class - Oh noes, we can't afford to redo our kitchen or have an overseas holiday, oh the humanity!

    Since May 2009 • 256 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Oh, I thought it was about her assets.

    Fix or float...

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4328 posts Report Reply

  • Robert Urquhart,

    The fault of unwanted attention is soley on the person giving it.

    I believe "The fault of continuing unwanted attention is solely on the person giving it" is a better generalisation. There are plenty of situations where it's either difficult to tell if attention is wanted or previously wanted attention becomes unwanted through no actual fault of the giver (and this applies across all genders).

    The assumption in this debate always seems to be that the recipient has made it clear in some way that the (or any) attention is unwanted and we all know that's often not the case. 'No means no' fer sure, but something has to happen to trigger the no.

    Christchurch • Since Mar 2009 • 140 posts Report Reply

  • Angus Robertson,

    The fault of unwanted attention is soley on the person giving it.

    However as the attention is only unwanted as determined by the contrary value judgements of the recipient, the giver is quite possibly blamelessly at fault.

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 984 posts Report Reply

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