Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Staying Civil

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  • Islander,

    Rich Lock -
    "the weather":

    -people here are equipped for that kind of stuff and, people over there, are equipped for that kind of stuff. Do you live permanantly under shelter?


    "the hassle" = say what? What kind of hassle? Some of those outdoor weddings had caterers (ahem, we *do* have those in the South you know.) Some had umukai organised by rellies plus the most wonderful range of canapes you can imagine.

    And, now I realise this is a legpull (but a pretty silly one)

    "the urbanisation of the entire country"

    or you genuinely dont know the the south-

    "difficulty of getting a celebrant" = one phonecall to a friend/local priest/whomsoever.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Islander, I was talking about the UK

    Do you live permanantly under shelter?

    Most people in the UK do, yes. Except during that 1/2 hr or so of sunshine which usually ocurrs sometime between the beginning of June and the end of August. When this happens everyone in the entire country goes a bit crazy and exposes far more flabby, luminous flesh than you really need to be thinking about right now. Before crawling back inot their burrows until the following year.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2401 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Mmmmokaaay-

    that picture you conjured is horreeeble-

    but totally inaccurate.

    One of my family had a perfectly beautiful 'pledging' in the far wild (&very cold) northern isles of the Orkneys(in Mainland, where some of my ancestors originate) -outdoors. Withoot a single WFKer anywhere. And with an indoor umukai-

    I also think that your comment about "most people in the UK" live permanantly under shelter is, frankly, idiotic.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    (And yep, legpull again - but truly silly.)

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Stowell,

    We find the trickier ones are what to call the wider family, eg, his mum is my...what? "Mother-in-fact"?

    "Mother-out-law" works very well.

    Whakaraupo • Since Nov 2006 • 1574 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Some people use MILFO.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8592 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Islander, I'm a bit bemused by the aggro vibes you're giving off.

    I made an observation (and that's all it was), that I thought civil ceremonies would find it hard to gain traction against church ceremonies, because the church does ritual and ceremony better.

    Several people, including you, noted that in New Zealand, the landscape and climate lend themselves vey well to outdoor ceremonies, and it's very easy to organise a good, classy epic civil ceremony. I think (and I thought I'd made clear) that that was something I'd overlooked, having a UK background, and I'm happy to stand corrected.

    However, I noted (and still think) that in the UK, it's a different story, and for a variety of reasons, and it's actually very difficult to organise a good ritualistic civil ceremony. Not impossible, but certainly more difficult than here.

    That's just an observation, coming from a reasonably informed background. I'm English. I grew up there, I spent 32 years of my life there. I know the landscape and the climate pretty well (including the Orkneys, btw), I know the people, and Iknow the bureaucratic institutions and their peculiarities.

    So if I want to make frankly idiotic comments about my country, I will, mmmkay?

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2401 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Go for it, mate. I'll agree.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Tamara,

    @ Rob - I like that, thanks!
    @BenWilson - harsh, and mine is actually quite delightful. But I know that's not so commonplace.

    New Zealand • Since Oct 2010 • 100 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    @Tamara, yes it's too harsh for mine, now that I've come to know her. I just like the joke, whilst people scratch their heads over what the O stands for.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8592 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Having had a partner in hospital yesterday (appendix out, home and healing nicely now) and finding useful information not entirely forthcoming set me wondering whether being listed as "partner" rather than "wife" on his contact form made any difference. Now I'm wondering how much of a real world difference marital status makes on the rights of (and the relevant institution's real or percieved responsibilities towards) the partner in these situations. I'm especially imagining if the worst happened and hard decisions had to be made. How much, if any, legal benefit is there in being married/civilised over being in a long term defacto relationship? And how much difference does the penis:vagina ratio make?

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 706 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    And how much difference does the penis:vagina ratio make?

    A lot - when my partner was in for his heart op, I was there with his niece and a doctor walked in and started talking to her. I was her eternal bitch when she cut him off and said, "You should be talking to my uncle's partner, and you would if you bothered checking who the next of kin is." (Let's face it, Craig is hardly gender-ambiguous.)

    As they say in the US Marine Corps, when you assume you make an ass out of you and me both.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12034 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Craig That sucks but your niece-in-lawish sounds awesome!

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 706 posts Report Reply

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