Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: The Classics Are Rubbish Too

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  • Che Tibby,

    Well, they're doing Under the Mountain, so O can't be far behind.

    and i say "yes, bring the wilberforces".

    the 80s version is in our local video store and i might be forced to make a dvd back-up copy, just in case they lose theirs.

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2042 posts Report Reply

  • Che Tibby,

    actually... i googled after i wrote that, and fond this

    can two gingas save the world? only in nzl.

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2042 posts Report Reply

  • Alan Perrott,

    yeah Iron Council and The Scar both - I think he may be a bit style over content over the long haul.

    and yeah again, mentioning the Historian only gets me blank looks.

    not sure about the Wilberforces remake. Just let it be, no good can come of it. And we don't need to encourage the return of public dribbling. It wasn't pretty.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 438 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    can two gingas save the world?

    Everything always comes back to the gingas with you, doesn't it, Che.

    Oh hey, me too, but hardly anyone else I know has heard of it.

    Now I'm wondering who I lent my copy to, so I can steal it back and re-read it.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • B Jones,

    No wayz! Reserve placed.

    There was a ginga elf in Rivendell. She moonlighted as a policy analyst.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 976 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    anyway, seeing as Craig was big upping Peter F Hamilton can I come back at you with the literary sensorium that is China Mieville's Perdido Street Station.

    You certainly can. I've got a copy somewhere, but it's like Proust -- in the sense that I keep getting stuck around the fifty page mark, but expect that at some point all the stars and planets will be in alignment and I'll break on through.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Litterick,

    Anyone who feels like a failure because they can't finish Gravity's Rainbow is lacking perspective.

    But anyone who feels Gravity's Rainbow is a failure because they can't finish it is lacking more.

    I didn't want to finish it. I too read as far as the BDSM Nazis and then lost the will to carry on. I realised that life had more to offer than this turgid book.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1000 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Rowe,

    Kurt Vonnegut - Slaughterhouse 5. Another book I finally got round to reading after hearing it referred to in hushed, worshipful tones by all and sundry.

    Yawn, big f**king deal. Firebombing picturesque mediaeval German cities is wrong. Yes, yes, I get it already, Kurt.

    Rich, you and me better step outside cos I'd hate to mess up this nice place. Vonnegut is & was a beautiful writer and Slaughterhouse 5 is a book I would go to war over*. If every Bozo who wanted to be Prez of th US of A read Slaughterhouse 5 & Catch 22 the world would be a better place.

    * and me a vegetarian too.

    Lake Roxburgh, Central Ot… • Since Nov 2006 • 574 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie,

    I realised that life had more to offer than this turgid book.

    Like, why read books when you could be slagging them? If I'd only finished Tristram Shandy I could've saved myself years of reading.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Paul this is a thread for critics to indulge their every prejudice. Someone even ragged on Heart of Darkness, the total philistine.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Rowe,

    Now that I think about it, the correct response is:

    He don't like Slaughterhouse 5? So it goes.


    (Can I extend my prejudice to include Nevermind? I'd hate to open that can of worms)

    Lake Roxburgh, Central Ot… • Since Nov 2006 • 574 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Now I'm wondering who I lent my copy to, so I can steal it back and re-read it

    I don't have your copy because I stole mine from my parents

    Someone even ragged on Heart of Darkness, the total philistine.

    And I'd rag on it again in a heartbeat.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report Reply

  • Che Tibby,

    i'm a recent reader of slaughterhouse five, and yeah, it's a good book.

    kooky. and good.

    but maybe not a classic. that time travel shit was, well, crazy. if i want my realities twisted left, right, and upside down i'll, well, follow politics.

    @megan, burley my good friend. burley. come come little ginger fishes.

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2042 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    We therefore have effing Jar-Jar at our house most weekends.

    Meesa feeling yoousa pain.

    Heart of Darkness

    Didn't like that one either. Too subtle. The film was much better. More helicopters and napalm.

    When it comes to hating on Lucas, I think the prize still goes to my friend jsr, who won the Ruptured Spleen Award with his effort

    Good effort. If anyone feels the need for a detailed surgical dissection of the crapness of the prequels (it's cathartic. No, really), I point you in the direction of chefelf

    The intro is a little out of date, but all of the films are there.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Funny that the Bible hasn't rated a mention yet. People would rather rag on George Lucas for not being perfect.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Funny that the Bible hasn't rated a mention yet.

    That's because God is perfect, infidel. Prepare to be burned at the stake.

    Anyway, the bibles great. Sex, war, infidelity, more sex, more war, supercool monsters, and the ending rocks! Angels opening seals and pouring blood upon the surface of the earth, death by the bucketload. What's not to love?

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    It's too short

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    What's not to love?

    Dunno, I found all that begetting in the prequel decidedly tedious.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    "The Bible" isnt a book! It's a compendium of poetry, legend, rubbish history, wishful thinking, prayers & psalms, whakapapa (adulterated),
    and moral/everyday behaviour directions. (Dont mix your linen & wool in clothing, for example. Stone disobedient children to death. Etc.)

    As an atheist, I despise the damage it has caused humanity.

    As a poet, I love the cadences of the King James RV (and some books - o inadvertently missed out by the KJRV?? - in the Vulgate)

    But - book it aint. No religious tome is. They are mind-'suaders, made over centuries, by humans with a vested interest in controlling other humans.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • John Farrell,

    If you dislike Dickens, why not try "The Pickwick Papers". It's the only book of his I enjoyed.

    Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 499 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    "The Bible" isnt a book!

    Much as I agree with your value judgments, I don't see how any of that makes the bible not a book. For a number of centuries in Europe the words bible and book were in fact synonimous. And bible originally means "books" (meaning the books that together form the whole which is the bible).

    A book instrumental in genocides and catastrophes and repression? Yes. But some books will do that.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Che Tibby,

    For a number of centuries in Europe the words bible and book were in fact synonimous.

    WOOT!! a tiso spelling mistake!

    take *that* mr multi-lingual "writes better than half of us"...

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2042 posts Report Reply

  • linger,

    Angels opening seals and pouring blood upon the surface of the earth

    ... and there's a mental image for your book club!

    Tokyo • Since Apr 2007 • 1944 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Drat, that's it with English then. I'm off to learn Finnish. Hyvästi, everyone!

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Giovanni - quite aware of the bible/biblos etc. is, per se, the word in Europe (well, a lot of European languages) for 'book'- BUT a compendium is NOT *a book*-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

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