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Posted at 2:43PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Shaun called it "the best kind of brain tumour to have", which I'm pretty sure means it gives me super-powers.

Or it could do this...

Better Adric than Nikki Brand and Brian O'Blivion. :)

Posted at 2:45PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Um.. hell... ah.... I'm not normally this eloquent.... um... GOOD LUCK! (playful punch to shoulder, runs in opposite direction in case Adic is contagious.)

Posted at 2:55PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Wow. At least it's not life-threatening. But it's a bugger that it's not giving you telepathy or telekinesis or shit. You should have got bitten by the spider.

Be well ;-)

Posted at 3:02PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Suck.

And I kinda liked Adric. Hmph.

Posted at 3:29PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Shaun called it "the best kind of brain tumour to have", which I’m pretty sure means it gives me super-powers.

Hopefully these powers will include the abilitiy to sustain repeated blows to the right side of your head.

If not, be extra careful.

Posted at 3:30PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I get the pupil dilation routine annually to check for diabetic retinopathy. The most annoying bit is they stay dilated for hours, and it turns out everything you like doing involves looking at stuff.

Worse than the dilation is the eyeball pressure test, in which they check how much fluid you've got in your eyeball (don't ask me why diabetics have gimpy eyeballs - either they just do, or the nation's medical professionals have been yakking it up at my expense for years now). Said test involves poking said eyeball with a measuring instrument. They say you can get used to anything, but so far I haven't got used to that one.

Posted at 3:32PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

'but I have a brain tumour'. ("Can you get out and open the garage door?" "But I have brain tumour!"). The clock is still running on "Adric made me do it."

Mileage smileage should continue and everyone will comment on how brave you are (after the Ohh! following words like "tumour" and "Adric". Keep it up. Hope your super powers crush it's super powers.

Posted at 3:36PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

And I kinda liked Adric. Hmph.

It was nearly Teegan, but if you're going to have a Teegan then you kind of have to have a Nyssa as well, and I'm not looking to do that.

Worse than the dilation is the eyeball pressure test, in which they check how much fluid you've got in your eyeball

Yeah, I got that one too, it sucked. And then the optometrist swung the arm of the examine-y machine around and smacked me in the left breast with it. Awesome.

Posted at 3:38PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Having something on your optic nerve that has to be 'kept an eye on' sounds contorted, but I guess you are used to a bit of contortion.

And I bet the Germans have a specific word (probably about a dozen syllables) for the kind of scary relief you get when it sounds really serious but turns out not to be as threatening as you immediately thought.

Keep your chin up (it minimises spillage). My thoughts are with you.

Posted at 3:38PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

everyone will comment on how brave you are

Oh, yeah, I'm a total wee battler, me. What I've been working on is getting as much booze, smoking and crap food in before somebody tells me I shouldn't.

Posted at 3:44PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

before somebody tells me I shouldn't.

I doubt they could ;) Cheers.
p.s. I think the 20 secs cry part really showed your human side.

Posted at 3:47PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

The feeling you get when you are told you have a tumour in your head is not fun. I had an acoustic neuroma (benign tumour on one of the nerves in the acoustic canal) few years ago. Eventually had to have surgery and lost hearing in that ear but a nurse in the hospital told me that if I was going to have a tumour in my head this was the one to have. Good luck with everything.

Posted at 3:52PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

What I've been working on is getting as much booze, smoking and crap food in before somebody tells me I shouldn't.

On my 90th birthday I will cease to resist cigars, cheese, and Class A drugs. I hope very much to see you at the party.

Posted at 3:59PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Oh, hon. Well done for coming this far without punching a medical specialist. And good luck with Adric. I always thought removing minor characters was fairly easy? I hope this proves so.

The radiographer was lovely, though with a curious total inability to refer to my partner as my partner and not my husband.

I once saw a neurologist who was at least four thousand years old. Explaining to him that I'd had an epileptic fit, while innocently alseep in bed with a gay man - and no I don't have a boyfriend, I'm a dyke - was the most fun I'd had all week. I hope that twitch stayed with him for months.

Posted at 4:01PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

On my 90th birthday I will cease to resist cigars, cheese, and Class A drugs. I hope very much to see you at the party.

I shall pencil it into my diary, darling.

Explaining to him that I'd had an epileptic fit, while innocently alseep in bed with a gay man - and no I don't have a boyfriend, I'm a dyke - was the most fun I'd had all week.

Heheheheheheh.

Posted at 4:18PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I postulated that perhaps what they'd seen was an obscuration caused by all the porn I'd read and watched in the last few years: a smut-clog. Either that or there was now medical evidence that 'it' really does make you go blind.

Your superpowers of humour are clearly unaffected.

Apparently half an hour after Mum woke up from her Adricectomy her surgeon said "Well then, the speech functions seem to be okay" and everyone in the room laughed and laughed.

Posted at 4:21PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

cigars, cheese, and Class A drugs

the combination for real grownups.

and Emma, just tell Adric to stay cool and act like nothing's happening at all.

Posted at 4:35PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

[...] the sort of tumour that you just leave in and keep an eye on.

Heeeeee. :D

Posted at 4:37PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Super powered tumour hmmm?

I expect a perpetual motion machine and the launch code for the US missile silos on my desk by morning!

As for the rest of you I am disappointed in you, I all the way at the bottom of this thread with out a Travolta reference!

Posted at 4:48PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

("but not as much as this would") and sent me out into the waiting room to wait for them to take effect.

Hah, been there (cataracts) you hang out with a bunch of others with watery eyes (and twice your age if it's cataract patient day) all peering in vain at the magazines & newspapers.

Posted at 5:03PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

"Offica I habve a bwain tumour, i wuv you" - please, oh please use that in anger at least once .....

In the mean time I'll be completely selfish and look forward to more hospital stories ....

Posted at 5:11PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

On my 90th birthday I will cease to resist cigars, cheese, and Class A drugs.

Isn't that leaving it a bit late? (Especially for the cheese?)

Posted at 5:19PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I'm already quite late. The next forty two will just fly by.

Posted at 5:34PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

The next forty two will just fly by.

So that's the booze and drugs. Just leaves the cigars and cheese....

Posted at 5:50PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

p.s. I think the 20 secs cry part really showed your human side.

I'm curious about what Emma's other side is now! Emma, are you secretly half-something-else? Like Lieutenant Saavik, say? </nerdlinger>

(Also: Christ, all that sounds scary. Empathetic ACK!)

Posted at 5:56PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I'm really glad it's not life threatening Emma, in the last two weeks I've had one friend diagnosed with skin cancer and another with MS, when I started reading this I thought "here we go again.."

Your superpowers of humour are clearly unaffected.

Set against the pathos, it's hilarious reading. Sorry if that's not quite what you were going for ; )

Posted at 6:35PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I'm curious about what Emma's other side is now!

I guess I always think of TANK GIRL

Posted at 6:40PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

Adric eh?
Good one.
I'd call arthritis a pet name too - say Phuqueu?- except I cant find a modicum of petsiness about the bloody thing.
I really enjoyed your post Emma - and empathise as only another myope who does the gamut of those kinda tests at least twice yearly - but without (to date) such an unnerving result..
may all come well -kia te hauora, kia te koa, kia ora na-

Posted at 6:43PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I've always wondered what it sounds like inside one of those machines. Congrats at defusing this so well that I have nothing other than that to focus on. Maybe I need some of them Jessica Rabbit drops..

Posted at 6:43PM on 27 Jul 09. Permalink.

I've had those pupil-dilating drops, so my optometrist could take piccies of the backs of my eyes. Amazing. I got lots of very odd looks for the next few hours.

I've never had the it's-a-brain-tumour-but-not-a-bad-one experience, 'though I have had the OMG-I've-found-a-lump-in-my-breast experience. It was... frightening, the first time. And completely benign. By the time I found the third one, some years later, I had gotten a little blase about it all, 'though I still got it checked out as soon as I found it. Benign, again, thank goodness.

I'm very glad to hear that Adric is a passive wee chap. Your sangfroid in the face of looming disaster astounds and humbles me, Emma.