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Random Play: Carter The Unstoppable Dick Machine

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  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    In Europe you must keep left and everyone does (if you don't you get tooted) and it really helps with traffic flow.
    But here in NZ people drive as they please and only speed up when you try to overtake them.

    Yes, its a bugbear of mine too but what my other 1/2 has taught me, is to use the horn. He's got a scary loud horn that is very effective and gets the message across.I never really used them until I saw how well they work.A toot to be polite,a longer beep to bring attention to inconsideration and a full on stay on horn until the twit in front (that is taking up the entire lane double parked, only thinking of the "sale" banner outside the shop, and too lazy to park in side street and walk around said corner) moves! Having vented that,I do think we are becoming more considerate on the road so perhaps it is out of necessity as the roads become more clogged.
    What is it about the speeding up only if you do want to overtake? The car you attempt to pass didn't want to go as fast as you do so why all of a sudden, do they want a race?

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6025 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    forcing me to overtake

    Yanno, there isn't a gun to your head.

    I'm a slow-laner myself, because I really hate tailgaters, but does it matter if you go at 95kms/h for a few minutes, in the grand scheme of things? What's with this bizarre need to pass everyone ahead of you? Why not just... slow down? Are you in labour? Are you a fireperson? Will the car explode if you go below 100kms/h? (Hrm. Someone should make a movie about that last one...)

    It's even worse in the country. I'm constantly terrified that some impatient dickhead will overtake me on a blind bend and kill six people in one fell swoop. I'm constantly pulling over on the way back from west coast beaches to let people zoom past me. I remember one morning when I pulled over *six times* on the way back from Piha to let people pass me who were actually *driving directly up my ass*. Yes, 90 kms/h on mountainous country roads is too slow, apparently. Meh. Just call me Granny Danielle from now on...

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3628 posts Report Reply

  • Deborah,

    Oh Danielle, you are forgetting the basic rule of the road. If someone overtakes you, your ah, equipment shrinks. If you have to go slower than you want because someone is travelling at or below the speed limit, your equipment shrinks. If you pull over to let someone past, your equipment shrinks.

    For women, if you are overtaken, if you have to go slower, if you pull over, then you look old and unsexy and god forbid, as though you are kowtowing to men. It's a FEMINIST statement to be a road pig. To hell with actually doing anything feminist - just dominate the road instead, and then you need not trouble your pretty head about silly little things like gender equality, because being a road pig proves you really can foot it with the men.

    Manawatu City • Since Nov 2006 • 1303 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    For women, if you are overtaken, if you have to go slower, if you pull over, then you look old and unsexy .

    Yep that's me without the car!:-)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6025 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    but FFS look at some of the time-servers on the National bench, starting with Hone here.

    Well, DC, take it up with the fine electors of Northland who, last time out handed him a majority north of nine thousand. Stupid fragging peasants...

    My American husband has a theory that New Zealanders are, in general, so laid-back and easygoing in their daily lives that the pent-up aggression has to come out somewhere, and that place is on the roads.

    Buy a stress ball and give me a break, is my response. :) I know that owning a car is a fundamental and inalienable human right in this country, but there's a reason why I don't drive. Just don't need the irritation.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11867 posts Report Reply

  • Shep Cheyenne,

    That trying to be tough kinda annoying Radio & TV DJ D'Arcy once told me, you're not hard core untill you stick to the 30km speed limit around road works at 3am.

    I still find that hard to do from time to time. I blame my only speeding ticket on lending the car to Dad.

    Mutual friends thing in Christchurch - you meet everyone.

    Since Oct 2007 • 927 posts Report Reply

  • Shep Cheyenne,

    Driving licences should be a 5yearly practicle resit.

    Since Oct 2007 • 927 posts Report Reply

  • Evan Yates,

    The law we don't have on the books, which we should, is to require motorists to KEEP LEFT UNLESS PASSING.

    Actually, we do have that road rule. It just is not particularly well enforced by neither peer pressure nor police punishment.

    However I would say that the Keep Left simply cannot practically be adhered to at times on motorways.The traffic density overwhelms the road carrying capacity and you just have to fill both lanes, leaving little opportunity for overtaking. Because of that, we forget how to keep left properly when traffic isn't so heavy. (They even make an allowance for traffic density in the road code.

    My experience with European motorways was a real eye-opener in terms of average traffic speed and lane discipline. I guess the difference is that Europe is a big place and motorways go in all sorts of directions across large distances between large cities. In New Zealand we only have a few motorways and generally speaking we are all trying to go to the same place (across a city) at the same time. The Waikato Expressway 4-lane to Hamilton (only to Ohinewai presently) is very seldom blocked up and people do tend to keep left (even obvious Jafastanis).

    BTW, it was me in 1997 that started the whole "Let-People-In" movement in Auckland. I was crawling along Greenlane Road in heavy traffic looking at the glum faces of those waiting hopelessly to join from side roads. In a rush of blood to the head, I let a car in (they hesitated at first, suspecting my motives) and gave me a friendly wave. This released self-congratulatory endorphins which I enjoyed and since then I have always looked for opportunities to let motorists in when it can be done safely. This has expanded in a "Pay-It-Forward" manner and now a lot of people are commenting on the overall change in driver behaviour.
    No thanks are necessary. Just send cash.

    Hamiltron, Te Ika-a-Māui • Since Nov 2006 • 190 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    I'm with the keep to the left lobby. Or if you're on a b road and you aren't in a huge hurry, and there's traffic behind you, pull over. Sometimes we're in a bit of a rush because it's a matter of life and death, and we can't judge why others' are in a hurry, can we? I would just relate the story of the night my brother called me to tell my that my dad had had a cardiac arrest and to get to the hospital quickly. I tried, I really did, but I was stuck behind this man doing 40kph. It wasn't peak hour, it was 8pm, it wasn't on the motorway........I didn't know if my father was dead or alive, and I wanted to get there in time. My whole thing is this, and I try to remember it at all times - don't drive in a bubble. There are people all around you who have their own stories, their own needs. Try to drive with consideration for other people, and don't do shitty things just because you don't know these people. We're all in this together, and just because you are in a one ton machine doesn't make you exempt.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3123 posts Report Reply

  • Shep Cheyenne,

    Two lanes & we're to keep to the left lane, unless ....

    I oppose that rule as a waste of money. All the cash that goes into roads & you're only supposed to use the right hand lane on the odd occation. Traffic engineers need a kick in the wallet.

    Since Oct 2007 • 927 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    Keeping left works fine in Germany. And people drive at 160Km/h as a matter of course, without all becoming extinct.

    What might be a fine scheme would be to introduce competitive driving tests, with the number of licenses in circulation capped at the present number. New licenses would only be issued as existing license holders die/emigrate/become too addled to drive.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 4422 posts Report Reply

  • Phil Sargent,

    Ah yes Evan,
    <quote>In a rush of blood to the head, I let a car in (they hesitated at first, suspecting my motives) and gave me a friendly wave. This released self-congratulatory endorphins which I enjoyed and since then I have always looked for opportunities to let motorists in when it can be done safely. This has expanded in a "Pay-It-Forward" manner and now a lot of people are commenting on the overall change in driver behaviour.<quote>

    You forgot to add the "road rage" like feeling if said let in motorist fails to make the friendly wave gesture.

    Since Nov 2006 • 28 posts Report Reply

  • Louise,

    I followed a car up 10 flights of a central Auckland parking building on the weekend that indicated every left turn (a right turn is the wall). Must have been a visitor to our city.

    Auckland • Since Feb 2008 • 19 posts Report Reply

  • Angus Robertson,

    When walking around in USA I was shocked to find out they noticed pedestrians (never happened in Auckland). Asked a few people who said they were taught in school Driver Education, they got cheaper insurance by completing the course and the lessons stuck.

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 984 posts Report Reply

  • Shep Cheyenne,

    Rich - "New licenses would only be issued as existing license holders die/emigrate/become too addled to drive."

    What is it about pepole of a certain age thinking the market is the answer to everything.

    And they do die - just because the can't find all the pieces doesn't mean they have a lower road toll.

    Since Oct 2007 • 927 posts Report Reply

  • samuel walker,

    You forgot to add the "road rage" like feeling if said let in motorist fails to make the friendly wave gesture.

    and the next level road rage when the three following cars take the opportunity to push their way in.....

    Since Nov 2006 • 203 posts Report Reply

  • Gabor Toth,

    When walking around in USA I was shocked to find out they noticed pedestrians (never happened in Auckland). Asked a few people who said they were taught in school Driver Education, they got cheaper insurance by completing the course and the lessons stuck.

    Another reason is a belief among some Americans that there are pedestrians who are actually trying to be struck by a motor vehicle to sustain minor injuries - so that they can then attempt to sue the driver of the vehicle for an obscene amount of money.

    Wellington • Since Dec 2006 • 119 posts Report Reply

  • Nick D'Angelo,

    Yanno, there isn't a gun to your head.

    Tee Hee Hee. I was going to say exactly that when I asterisked the following:

    Nothing drives me more crazy than having someone driving down the motorway at 95kmph in the 'fast lane' forcing me to overtake on the inside lane*

    i.e. (Cue response: no-one's forcing you to - is a life really worth the extra speed?) but deleted it because if I said it myself then no-one would actually say it. Of course you're right Danielle, but I'm right too. I prefer to get somewhere in a timely fashion and not be held up by someone who feels they're going fast enough thank you so just fall in behind. (and I'm not suggesting Dannielle does this, it's a generic 'you')

    Actually, we do have that road rule. It just is not particularly well enforced by neither peer pressure nor police punishment.

    Thanks for that it's no saved to my Toolbar favourites. I shall forward to all and sundry. (And they in return shall mock me).

    BTW, it was me in 1997 that started the whole "Let-People-In" movement in Auckland.

    Heh heh. The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Why am i always stuck behind the car that lets in the other car from the side road. but the car he lets in is always trying to get across two lanes to turn right and ends up blocking all lanes because the way is not clear? :)

    what my other 1/2 has taught me, is to use the horn. ...I never really used them until I saw how well they work. A toot to be polite,a longer beep to bring attention to inconsideration and a full on stay on horn until the twit in front ... moves!

    I took your advice this afternoon on Balmoral Rd heading towards Greenlane. A chap couldn't decide what lane he was in and since I wanted to turn left at the intersection ahead I gave him a polite toot. He shifted right, allowing me to pass on the left, and turn. He then followed my left turn, and chased me, hooting continuously. At the next stop sign he tried to get out of his car, but I continued on, and he continued chasing me, hooting continuously. At the next stop light he got out, thumped my car, and insisted I get out. I did not. He continued chasing me, hooting continuously, until giving up halfway down Gillies Ave. I believe he only stopped because he could guess I was on the phone to the Police. Little did he know they were not much help since they wanted to know exactly what part of Gillies Ave I was at, and what his registration number was. Sorry Constable but he is tailgating me and I am unable to read his number plate, or the numbers on the letterboxes I am passing. Should I pullover, get out, and have a look?

    And of course if I did that I'd end up thumping him, probably killing him with just one punch (yes, my hands are lethal weapons) (makes up for my tiny equipment) and then I'd be in the dock ...

    Oh look, Desperate Housewives is almost on ...

    Simon Laan • Since May 2008 • 157 posts Report Reply

  • samuel walker,

    He then followed my left turn......

    how the heck can someone think that is a rational response? or, be so lacking in any kind of self control to be unable to rise above what even at the worst, considering a miss-translation, could have been what seemed like a rude gee-up. I mean just label the rude hooter a wanker and go on with their life. i bet the miscreant is sitting at home right now fuming over it still. mulling over lost opportunities to inflict more terrorism.

    can someone like that lead a normal life? shit is dangerously close to setting a man up for some serious contemplation about the state of our species.

    but seriously nick, desperate housewives?

    Since Nov 2006 • 203 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I took your advice this afternoon on Balmoral Rd

    :-) Oh yeah, that does happen occasionally.Trick is to stare back honking but plan the speedy get away down the next side street and overtake on the in/outside,whichever works, cos I believe it's a grid anyway.(albeit a slightly wonky one sometimes.
    Also you're lucky you didn't go down Mt Eden Rd,Just after Balmoral Rd, Suv's and sports cars were floating or acting like hydroplanes , nicely thanks.I now know what the roadworks had been.
    It is nice to know there are people out there giving the police something better to do than tickets. Thanks for that, keep up the good work!
    P.S.I also know someone with a bread gun.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6025 posts Report Reply

  • Nick D'Angelo,

    but seriously nick, desperate housewives?

    Seriously? Life On Mars actually.

    how the heck can someone think that is a rational response?

    I was driving someone else's Audi, hence my reluctance to get out of the car and see who's equipment is biggest. This doesn't happen to me when I'm in my Mitsubishi, so I wonder if it was the car. Did he think I was a 'Rich Prick', and if he did does that justify his response? And if it doesn't then do we blame Cullen for stirring a class war?
    But he coulda just been Random Angry Guy.

    Simon Laan • Since May 2008 • 157 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    P

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6025 posts Report Reply

  • Mark,

    Carter's my local MP and he is a very approachable person and works hard for his electorate. Swearing at a cop and ringing up a radio station 13 years ago pretending to be a Maori does not constitute "ample evidence" of being a dickhead. I've told you a million times not to exaggerate Graham ...

    Since Dec 2006 • 28 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    Carter's my local MP and he is a very approachable person and works hard for his electorate. Swearing at a cop and ringing up a radio station 13 years ago pretending to be a Maori does not constitute "ample evidence" of being a dickhead. I've told you a million times not to exaggerate Graham ...

    Heh, Do you think the "not registered" comment was a dig at the car not being registered as a political pamphlet or what__ever__

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6025 posts Report Reply

  • Mark,

    Knowing the particular copper who stopped him, I wouldn't consider him to be that politically aware

    Since Dec 2006 • 28 posts Report Reply

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