Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Newsflash: Women Have Eyes

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  • Stewart,

    Fear not, Ms Wegan, for it is my belief that the most attractive thing about a woman is an air of confidence . Admittedly, I am not in the 1st blush of youth and would not turn your head in the beefcake stakes, but over the years I have come to realise that the overall outward appearance is only slightly important.

    But that 'head up, shoulders back' look of confidence is one of the sexiest damn things a woman can wear.

    We are all hampered (or helped, for the very fortunate) by our genes, but the confidence thing is something we can work at, regardless of genetic inheritance.

    [I never would have fit the parameters for inclusion in Filament.]

    Te Ika A Maui - Waitakere… • Since Oct 2008 • 563 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    A friend of mine back in high school had a name for the projecting confidence thing: walk around pretending you're a turkey.

    Actually - and this is quite interesting - he was very unattractive indeed, whichever way you looked at him, but he did project an air of confidence. Not that it helped him any, he was simply too unattractive. But still.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7351 posts Report Reply

  • Lyndon Hood,

    Improv guru Keith Johnstone says the heroic attitude is achieved by visualising a radiant ball of blue light on your chest.

    That may not be the effect you're after here, but he assures the world it gets you served quicker at the bar.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1095 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Hosking,

    A friend of mine back in high school had a name for the projecting confidence thing: walk around pretending you're a turkey.

    Excellent. So you pour a jar of cranberry sauce over your bonce and suddenly its babe magnet time.

    South Roseneath • Since Nov 2006 • 802 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    which I would describe as "so many hot young long-haired men in PVC, so little time."

    I very slightly pre-dated the PVC, but the general principle is the same and the task more overwhelming if one substitutes the word 'people' for 'men'. And I think KAOS is so insidious that one never actually needs to join to be considered to belong forever.

    Thanks for dropping in Suraya, it's good to see. I always feel better when I don't have to speak for people.

    Fear not, Ms Wegan, for it is my belief that the most attractive thing about a woman is an air of confidence.

    Megan is gorgeous.

    I would just like to say that Daniel Craig is a very intelligent man.

    I do find intelligence attractive. Even the one beefcake gym-bunny I... was intimately acquainted with was doing a double post-graduate degree and spoke fluent German. (He had the body of a Greek god. I know cause he told me.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    He had the body of a Greek god.

    Which Greek god, though? Aephestus was supposedly very ugly indeed (although, great buns according to the old Italian 50 Lire coin).

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7351 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    great buns according to the old Italian 50 Lire coin

    Okay, now there's a country that knows how to make coinage! I say we agitate for a newly redesigned dollar coin with Kevin Smith on it. (Actually, come to think about it, he'd be better on a bill - something you can comfortably tuck into a g-string.)

    And I did consider asking him if it was the ol' lame smith, but he'd already totally failed to get my 'Miss Perkins, you're beautiful' joke when he took my hair down and my glasses off.

    Mike, if you're reading this, it's okay. You're pretty, you don't need credibility.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • Stewart,

    My apologies for even the merest suggestion that Megan is anything other than ravishing.

    Te Ika A Maui - Waitakere… • Since Oct 2008 • 563 posts Report Reply

  • Julian Melville,

    Hi Suraya - I have no opinion on near-nekkid men, but I can say that Panasonic definitely make hi-fi headphones that are too small for a man-sized head. I have such a head and the damn things don't fit!

    (Good luck with the mag too)

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 183 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    ... but I can say that Panasonic definitely make hi-fi headphones that are too small for a man-sized head.

    As do Technics.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Intelligence is far and away the sexiest thing ever, especially the way it can light up in someone's eyes. I've been known to go completely gooey for the kind of eyes that are all pensive one moment and sparking with devilment the next.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 705 posts Report Reply

  • steven crawford,

    I've been known to go completely gooey for the kind of eyes that are all pensive one moment and sparking with devilment the next.

    I'm all ears, looking for ways to squeeze some throttle out of my middle aged ora. What about men in suits?

    Since Nov 2006 • 2600 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    What about men in suits?

    A well-cut suit can do wonders for a man's 50 Lire region. Nummy.

    I also like, however (and I'm not quite sure how to describe this) a sense in either a man or a woman that they've largely dressed to please themselves, that they have some individuality and flair in what they wear. That could well be a confidence thing too.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Aephestus was supposedly very ugly indeed

    Typical. Always ragging on the engineers for their hideous deformities and lack of success with teh wimminz.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2357 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Always ragging on the engineers for their hideous deformities and lack of success with teh wimminz.

    Er... you know whom he was married to, right?

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7351 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    What about men in suits?

    Depends entirely on how he's wearing the suit. If he's feeling good and having fun with his suit wearing then it is hottt but if he's looking all itchy and restricted and like he wants to race home and put on something, anything, else then it's not so sexy (though it could be endearing and endearing can definitely work with the ladies).

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 705 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen,

    for it is my belief that the most attractive thing about a woman is an air of confidence.

    yeah right

    So the same eye movement studies Emma mentioned show that those who like women like the hourglass proportion. Size make little difference and neither does an air of confidence, if she has that ratio of bust to waist to hips a women will get looked at. Which is interesting when you consider that models almost never have that ratio.

    After that you may well be right, the things that make you want to keep talking to her and noticing she has eyes as well will be things like confidence and the ability to use words with more than two syllables. But the initial "attractiveness" is dependent on that damn ratio, oh and of course youth which is all about reproductive ability.

    Pretty much the same is true for guys. The things linked to probable reproductive performance are right up there in initial attractiveness, shoulders, buttocks (as my mother informed me while she "watched" ice skaters), not too much fat although no fat at all isn't good either. Oh and indicators of power.

    However as we get past reproductive concerns it may well be true that we look for different things. It would be really interesting to do the same eye movement studies with people in their 40s and 60s and see if we become more interested in indicators of people we might like to talk to and live with rather than just those with which we want to reproduce.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3264 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    for it is my belief that the most attractive thing about a woman is an air of confidence.

    yeah right

    Oh yes, please, if I get to have this conversation one more time I think I'm due to win a motorboat.

    You veer dangerously towards the evolutionary biologist's view of what makes people attractive, which may have some generic and general speculative validity but doesn't speak for all of us. So if somebody tells you they are turned on by intelligence or an air of confidence, hey, probably pays to believe them, until you get proof to the contrary. I can certainly think of a lot of people I know, men and women, whose modest conventional attractiveness was greatly supplemented by their personality, intelligence, dress sense and savoir faire. It doesn't mean that the drop dead gorgeous of both sexes will be left biting the dust, but we all have to play with the hand that we are dealt.

    (Another cliche and the motorboat gets a minibar.)

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7351 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    Er... you know whom he was married to, right?

    Arranged marriage.

    And that didn't stop her sneaking off with that beefcake Ares behind his back.

    See, women tell you they want a thinker, and someone who's good around the house, but then they're off making eyes at some well-chisled murdering munter in a nicely-tailored uniform.

    I kid, I kid.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2357 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Arranged marriage.

    Hey, it just came back to me: Oliver Reed and Uma Thurman! Boy, was that a genius piece of casting, or what?

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7351 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Er... you know whom he was married to, right?

    Indeed, a woman who was not averse to a bit of take-out.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    That's extremely reductionist, Bart.

    I absolutely believe that when a large group is sampled, these tendencies in preference emerge. But how strong is that preference? What is the deviation in the range of preferences? I suspect that any given person's preferences are likely to differ from these statistical averages substantially.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2936 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I can certainly think of a lot of people I know, men and women, whose modest conventional attractiveness was greatly supplemented by their personality, intelligence, dress sense and savoir faire.

    Consider, people who are not attractive in photographs, but in person always attract attention and never appear to be 'short of options'.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    See, women tell you they want a thinker, and someone who's good around the house, but then they're off making eyes at some well-chisled murdering munter in a nicely-tailored uniform.

    Okay, now see, that's hardly fair when in one's head Ares looks like this.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    It would be really interesting to do the same eye movement studies with people in their 40s and 60s and see if we become more interested in indicators of people we might like to talk to and live with rather than just those with which we want to reproduce.

    Or, y'know, gay people.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4340 posts Report Reply

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