Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Time for an Intervention

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  • Kyle Matthews,

    PS: Don't forget you're a drained swamp, we can take that great leap backwards.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6208 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    PS: Don't forget you're a drained swamp, we can take that great leap backwards.

    See, this is why we're not worried about rising sea levels. All that water'll just go where that water used to be. Simple.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4369 posts Report Reply

  • Dave Patrick,

    you'll still pick Sideshow Bob, because you genuinely believe he's got your best interests at heart

    And you could type this without laughing?

    /me doesn't feel quite so bad being in Waimakariri District, even though we gave Jim Gerard a job for a few years

    Rangiora, Te Wai Pounamu • Since Nov 2006 • 237 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    All that water'll just go where that water used to be

    So draining your region's water table now to irrigate farms is part of a long-term cunning plan. Genius.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16794 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    And you could type this without laughing?

    It's an art. Also, no-one can see me.

    So draining your region's water table now to irrigate farms is part of a long-term cunning plan. Genius.

    It's part of the John Key hydrology engineering plan. If you don't use water, it goes out to sea and gets wasted. So it stands to reason, if you can get that water to come back from the sea, you can use it. Otherwise Bastard Nature is just getting a free ride again. Sorry, Lake Ellesmere, the dream is over.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4369 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    It's part of the John Key hydrology engineering plan.

    Such a versatile expert. I wonder if farmers will also save on salt licks for those extra cattle?

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16794 posts Report Reply

  • chris,

    That was a very funny blog Emma.

    中国 • Since Jan 2010 • 900 posts Report Reply

  • richard thomson,

    What? We're cool in Wellington? Cos for mayor we picked the person who managed to get her photo on the front page of the paper standing next to Peter Jackson?

    owhiro bay • Since Mar 2008 • 9 posts Report Reply

  • webweaver,

    Of course! We're cool just... because.

    Not as cool as Carterton of course - anyone who votes for Georgina as mayor has to be the coolest of the cool in my book. Wish she'd stand for Mayor of Wellington (there was a rumour she might a coupla years back) - maybe she'd be able to release us from Prendergastly's iron grip...

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 329 posts Report Reply

  • Dave Patrick,

    Emma, a question for you, from someone who's only lived down this way through Sideshow Bob and his predecessor Garry "Not Vicki Buck" Moore - was Vicki Buck really as great as everyone seems to make her?

    Rangiora, Te Wai Pounamu • Since Nov 2006 • 237 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    was Vicki Buck really as great as everyone seems to make her?

    *looks shifty* Vicki Buck was at FooCamp, and everyone seemed very impressed by her. Down to earth, no airs, ready to listen. Also she was integrally involved in setting up the special-character school my children attend.

    My partner did have a run-in with her while she was mayor, however, which doesn't show her in the best light. He was working customer service in a video store, she used the phrase "Don't you know who I am?"

    We're cool in Wellington? Cos for mayor we picked the person who managed to get her photo on the front page of the paper standing next to Peter Jackson?

    As long as "cos" means "in spite of the fact that", then yes.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4369 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    As long as "cos" means "in spite of the fact that", then yes.

    Correlation is not causation.

    Here, have one of ours. We will soon have several left-over mayors looking for a new gig. Dya want Banksy or Harvey? Oh yeah, he's Bob too. That your uncle?

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • amanda peter,

    ohh long time enjoyer, first time caller. Driven to print by the travesty of Sideshow Bob.

    Don't even start me on the Art Centre, Odeon, Regional council debacle!! and then two days ago I get some creepy call on who would I vote for, Jim Anderton perhaps? wrong wrong wrong!

    Bob the show pony do seem cut from a similarly poor cloth as Banks and the "lets rip those hundred year old sheds down" brigade.

    So apart from a couple of dodgy moments, at least 1 with the Edgeware pool, Gazza was mint, low key, always personable and has a son who runs the best sifty joint in town 'Goodbye Blue Monday', which I will need to visit much more frequently to recover from these awful choices.

    Otautahi-the flat city • Since Sep 2008 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • philipmatthews,

    I think we'd happily settle for Harvey. Not Banksy. Actually, Banksy would be fantastic -- but not Banks.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 642 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Bob the show pony do seem cut from a similarly poor cloth as Banks and the "lets rip those hundred year old sheds down" brigade.

    1. Bizarre as it feels to say it, Banks 2.0 has been better than the first-generation mayoral prototype, even if only because it doesn't talk fanciful crap all the time, and appears to have gained the humility feature (although this feature remains unstable).

    2. Level the bloody sheds. Not all old buildings are important. (And, indeed, our business overlords got rid of most of the important old buildings 25 years ago.)

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 18991 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    What's a sifty joint, pray tell?

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    We'd settle for Harvey over the Wallbanger any day also. Well, I would.

    Banksy is legend. Can't wait to see that film.

    2. Level the bloody sheds. Not all old buildings are important. (And, indeed, our business overlords got rid of most of the important old buildings 25 years ago.)

    Word. Elvis Costello at St Kevin's Arcade. What were we thinking?

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    Whoops. Wrong building. His Majesty's Theatre I mean. Too many Wallbangers.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Dya want Banksy or Harvey?

    Yeah, if you're giving away mayors we'll have Harvey. by now I'm pretty sure he's not a a giant invisible rabbit.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4369 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    It would be so awesome to have that Harvey in charge of things. Or indeed that Banksy.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7386 posts Report Reply

  • Joe Wylie,

    (And, indeed, our business overlords got rid of most of the important old buildings 25 years ago.)

    And overladies. The real rape of Auckland's meagre remaining architectural heritage took place under the active connivance of Cath Bloody Tizard.

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 3565 posts Report Reply

  • amanda peter,

    What's a sifty joint, pray tell?
    one of these http://goodbyebluemonday.co.nz/

    sorry this whole cut'n'paste could be an epic fail!, but loved his Majesty's & yeah Jim Gerard...deep unimpressive sigh...

    Otautahi-the flat city • Since Sep 2008 • 11 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Nice site, ta
    (and Amanda, it's Otautahi)

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16794 posts Report Reply

  • Just thinking,

    Faark, you didn't hear half the names a group of pinko-subversives I incriminate myself with were talking about on Sunday.

    Jim didn't come up though, good of him to signal an intent though.

    Emma, I am most disappointed in you siding with Aaron (ACT candidate) and chief tagger of Christchurch.
    Ya'know all those pasted ABBA signs on the street lights and phone boxes - HIS business, a Community Bored member. If not tagging, it's illegal advertising.

    Is it too long a bow to draw by highlighting Dave Henderson is the landlord to our cities sex industry & Bob (er us) is his banker?

    24April in the Square there is a protest against the survaliance bill- shhsh.

    Putaringamotu • Since Apr 2009 • 1147 posts Report Reply

  • Lucy Stewart,

    and then two days ago I get some creepy call on who would I vote for, Jim Anderton perhaps? wrong wrong wrong!

    I'm pretty sure there were several other names in that survey. And Nicky Wagner, also mentioned, is *much* creepier than Jim Anderton. By several order of magnitude.

    He was working customer service in a video store, she used the phrase "Don't you know who I am?"

    Euuuuughhhhh. OTOH, competency + dickishness >>>>>> incompetency + dickishness, and we all know on which side of that equation Parker falls.

    Then again, wouldn't it be nice to be able to choose between *several* competent, decent candidates? One can only dream.

    Amherst, MA • Since Nov 2006 • 2093 posts Report Reply

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