Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: P.A. Story

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  • James Butler, in reply to recordari,

    Silly, everyone knows only the Clone Warriors are Māori.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2009 • 790 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Jackie Clark,

    Jackie, I think Lilith is referring to the column I write for my tribe's quarterly* magazine, "Te Karaka"...you can probably find it on-line at the Ngai Tahu site.

    In my final year at secondary school, I was the geography class: the teacher was an enthusiastic young Englishman whose passion was geomorphology, and it became one of my passions too-

    * the 'quakes have meant one issue was cancelled this year.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Lilith __, in reply to Islander,

    Indeed, I clicked through from Recordari's stormtooper link. (sorry to be circuitous, just trying to respect everyone's privacy)

    Dunedin • Since Jul 2010 • 3300 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Lilith __,

    No worries Lilith - and thank you!

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Lilith __,

    (sorry to be circuitous

    It's the circle of life, or alternatively the big O. ;-)

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to recordari,

    Oooooo!

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Lilith __,

    Speaking of ships (as Megan was, some way upthread), I'm hoping to meet an intrepid band of Avonsiders in houseboats at some point in the story. Jolisa's young friend was onto something there!

    Dunedin • Since Jul 2010 • 3300 posts Report Reply

  • tussock,

    Needs more Orcs from Mordor, hunting unionised actors at government expense. The actors have been playing the stormtroopers, but aren't actually Māori at all. Hone's outraged, but the Maori party explains it's the cost of being in government.

    The ACTzis™©, the ones in the Orc suits, they'll sue. They were promised Māori! Equality, damn it! No special treatment!

    Hone to the Red Zone, Hone Harawira to the Red Zone. Te Reo may be an official language, but you can't give oaths in it. It's just not cricket. Swear on a Koran all you like, you cheeky darkie, just do it in the Queen's English as the big O intended.

    Unless that's all to political, this close to an election. Can you imagine the capital gains to be made in the Red Zone? W00t!

    Since Nov 2006 • 338 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark, in reply to Islander,

    And a beautiful column it is too. I didn't find the geomorphology one - I got stuck on the lovely post about your gift kete.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3112 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Jackie Clark,

    O Jackie! I do miss those people so much- but Taua Fan's kete is now safely esconsed in a family house. It contains some of the things I want to hand on to younger generations and - yep, I dont trust this* place to last a lot longer-

    Big O

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Tamsin6, in reply to Stephen Judd,

    Tamsin lurched under the force of her boss' wrath.

    That's uncanny - have you been following me to work?

    London • Since Dec 2007 • 123 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    "Help, I'm sinking" cried the lead character whose name I don't know yet, as she slipped off the bottom rung of the threaded ladder.

    "Wesley, where the bloody hell are you?" she protested.

    "Aaaaas yoooou wiiiiish!"

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan, in reply to recordari,

    “Help, I’m sinking” cried the lead character whose name I don’t know yet, as she slipped off the bottom rung of the threaded ladder.

    “Wesley, where the bloody hell are you?” she protested.

    “Aaaaas yoooou wiiiiish!”

    Emma. Please also include this verbatim. Cos: Fucking brilliant.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1268 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Megan Wegan,

    Cos: Fucking brilliant.

    Thank you! Might just put that on a badge. PB FTW! ;-)

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to recordari,

    The Romaines of the Salad Days...

    Cos: Fucking brilliant.

    Cos : a lettuce of a variety with crisp narrow leaves that form a tall head... *


    *looks a bit like Macaw 7 a.k.a. St Richie

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 4220 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart, in reply to Megan Wegan,

    Emma. Please also include this verbatim. Cos: Fucking brilliant.

    I shall certainly try.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4286 posts Report Reply

  • wendyf, in reply to Megan Wegan,

    There should be five ships.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 76 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    Cos : a lettuce of a variety with crisp narrow leaves that form a tall head... *

    Lettuce not to the marriage of true minds
    Admit implements.

    Oh wait, it's 'let me'. Well, having peaked, I shall retire to my chambermaid.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen, in reply to wendyf,

    There should be five ships.

    That pass each other in the night?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3114 posts Report Reply

  • wendyf, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    One sinks.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 76 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen, in reply to wendyf,

    One sinks

    And all aboard are lost to the deeps save one, clinging desperately to a barrel filled with anabolic steroids destined for the red and blacks, he is washed ashore and found by a chocolatier out for her midnight walk along rocks.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3114 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    clinging desperately to a barrel filled with anabolic steroids destined for the red and blacks

    Oi! We would never so sully the brilliance of our beautiful, beautiful back line. A barrel of Cheekbone Sculpt, maybe.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4286 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    the ship of fools....

    One sinks
    And all aboard are lost to the deeps save one, clinging desperately to a barrel filled with anabolic steroids destined for the red and blacks, he is washed ashore and found by a chocolatier out for her midnight walk along rocks...

    ...near Governors Bay right?

    and just cos it's friday, lettuce play...

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 4220 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen, in reply to Emma Hart,

    Oi! We would never so sully the brilliance of our beautiful, beautiful back line. A barrel of Cheekbone Sculpt, maybe.

    Just checking to see if you were watching - how about moisturizing facial scrub :P

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3114 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan, in reply to Bart Janssen,

    Or a shipment of hair straighteners.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1268 posts Report Reply

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