Field Theory by Hadyn Green

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Field Theory: A vile curse on thee!

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  • Donald Reid,

    You're probably aiming at teams rather than individuals... but i hate Naas Botha. I can't remember ever seeing him play, but he's always got on my wick anyway. Also have a bit of a dislike for the Denver Broncos after they stopped being useless (odd, because I quite like them when they were/are useless).

    Dunedin, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 17 posts Report Reply

  • Gareth Ward,

    In which case I hope you caight South Park last night - in which an elaborate "Hispanic teacher inspires those down-on-their-luck-black-kids-from-an-urban-school" setup was created pretty much entirely to call Belichick and the Patriots cheaters...
    "This is Bill Belichick, coach of the New England Patriots. He's won three Super Bowls. How? He cheated. He even got caught cheating, and nobody cared. Bill Belichick proved that in America, it's OK to cheat, as long as you cheat your way to the top. ... If you cheat and fail, you're a cheater. If you cheat and succeed, you're savvy."

    Auckland, NZ • Since Mar 2007 • 1727 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    If you cheat and succeed, you're savvy

    I'm kind of glad I missed that, it would've sent my blood pressure through the roof.

    When Beilchick was caught cheating and then people were defending him and saying that "every team does it" and that the Jets broke some kind of "code" by pointing out that he was cheating, I almost lost it completely. (deep breaths)

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2090 posts Report Reply

  • Richard Irvine,

    The big obvious ones for me are Arsenal and Chelsea. Fuckers. Let's put them to one side.

    Also the Australian cricket team. Blame the Waugh brothers.

    But my biggie is North Harbour. Being forced to bed down with them in the Chiefs, was bad enough, but they're a union with crap players, crap uniforms, two crap stadiums, never won anything, a 'created' team wtih no history, a sense of entitlement out of all porportion with their ability.

    There was one sheild challenge at Rugby Park in the mid ninties that sealed it, when Richard Turner said afterwards he hoped to not see the shield ever again. That, and two middle aged North Harbour fans getting in a fight with me mate in McDonalds that that night.

    The thing is, I live on the shore now, and my son was born there. Learn from my mistakes, be veeeeery careful out there, team.

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 242 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    I support Canterbury and Chelsea (Sorry Richard). I acknowledge that I am anathema to most sports fans.

    My only redeeming feature is that I support the Sacramento Kings, who, despite being owned by casino owners pretty much suck.

    Having said that, when it gets to the NBA playoffs, and the Kings (invariably) aren't there, I support the San Antonio Spurs. So I'm back to square one.

    It's lucky I am used to having abuse hurled at me.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Richard Irvine,

    I support Canterbury and Chelsea (Sorry Richard).

    Ye gods. Judging by my post above, it appears I'm no fan of spelling or correct punctuation either.

    Auckland • Since Dec 2006 • 242 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    Ye gods

    Oh, and before the Warriors came along, back when I actually cared about league, I was a Manly fan. Who apparently people hate too.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Brent Jackson,

    I'm not sure about hatred, but I've always disliked BP petrol stations. I always avoided using them whenever possible. A couple of years back I did a consumer survey on petrol stations and my dislike of BP was wholly evident. I had never stopped to think about why I disliked them, I just did. I spent a week with it really bugging me. I couldn't work out why I disliked them so much. Then I had a light-bulb moment - I knew why I hated BP. When I was about 10, I was out biking with a mate, and he got a flat tyre. He had those new (at the time) tubes that had the same valves as car tyres. We were near a BP station. It said "Free Air". We helped ourselves. The manager came out it a rage telling us that we were not allowed to use it, it was for the cars. So my friend rode home on his flat tyre, ruining it. So I've hated BP for 30 odd years because of it !

    You'd think that once I'd realised this, I could just let it go. But I still avoid using BP whenever possible. Luckily, I can now rationalise it because they are almost always the first ones to put their prices up, and never the first to put them down. (And I loathe their "Beyond Petroleum" mock-environmental branding).


    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 620 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,



    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • Stewart,

    I'm with you, Richard on hating Arsenal - I lived near Highbury for a few months (including the end of their season) and their fans were by and large not very nice people. I felt seriously threatened just being in the same pub as them when ManU were winning a match and they were losing theirs - the sheer intensity of their hatred was a wonder to behold - and not in a good way.

    Funnily, though, I did like Denis Bergkamp who, apart from being a bit of a dirty Dutchie (he used to stamp on opponents if they were in the ground), was a sublime footballer.

    And when it comes to rugby, it has to be England who seem to have a preternatural attitude of superiority that allows them & their fans to believe that any time they have been beaten it has been by a team of cheats. Oh, the sheer bliss when they get beaten by a team of perennial losers like Scotland!

    Te Ika A Maui - Whakatane… • Since Oct 2008 • 577 posts Report Reply

  • Stewart,

    "...**on** the ground..." obviously.

    Te Ika A Maui - Whakatane… • Since Oct 2008 • 577 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    I have probably mentioned this before, but my husband's list of American sporting hatreds is so comprehensive that it might actually be easier to list the teams he *doesn't* hate. In the NBA, he hates the Jazz, the Knicks, the Lakers, the Mavericks, the Spurs (intra-Texan issues are strong with him, and as a Houstonian, he feels he is an underdog); in baseball, he hates the Mets, the Dodgers, the Yankees, the Braves, the Cubs; in football, he hates the Cowboys (no one has ever hated the Dallas Cowboys as much as he does. It's pathological). I'm missing many of them, probably. I can't keep track, and I don't have that lengthy history of failure and bitterness. Heh. (He does like the Sacramento Kings though, Megan!)

    I hate *several* past and present members of the Australian cricket team. (And Tyra Banks. But that's a fun kind of hatred.)

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    I hate *several* past and present members of the Australian cricket team.

    Ack. Brett Lee. The day he released that Bollywood single was one of the best days of my life, because it gave me something to snigger over forever.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,

    I reckon Lee’s one of the less offensive of the current Aus cricket team; except for when he’s trying to kill our Prince Brendan with beamers.

    Hayden; bible-bashing redneck.

    Ponting; for obvious reasons.

    Clarke; a cheat with an annoying fiancé

    Hussey; Link: statistical anomaly

    Symonds; way too much make-up.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • Naly D,

    Hehe, I'm a Patriots fan. Have been since I was eight.
    I think the reason people 'hate' the Pats is because they're so clinical. I see them like the Crusaders.
    The same 'unexciting gameplay' argument could be applied to the Patriots. They're about short yardage gains [mainly] and are not afraid to run the screen play after play after play after play.
    Their players reflect this. I do get bored of it sometimes, but support them nevertheless [The Patriots that is, not the Crusaders. Hate those f*****s.]
    My other team in NFL though is more comparable to my S14 team [Hurricanes]... The New Orleans Saints. When they win, it's through flashy 50 yard runs/70 yard passes/interception TDs. When they lose, it's because they've just fallen apart.
    I second the Denver Broncos hate-age. It seems every time the Saints or Pats go up against them and I manage to catch the match, they lose. Like the time I missed my flight out of ChCh to watch the playoffs match.

    But as to the team I just wish a curse upon on a nightly basis? The Blues. I still remember the days of the massive trouncings of my beloved 'Canes. Even though the tables have turned, there's still something sneaky about those little b______s*.

    *Ali Williams and Joe Rokocoko excluded.

    Wellington • Since Sep 2008 • 307 posts Report Reply

  • Rich Lock,

    I feel the need to quibble with your irrational hatreds. They're so illogical and unnecessary.

    But first...

    but now I support … I dunno, France?

    France? FRANCE? Those stinky-garlic cheese eating surrender monkeys, with their snooty we're-so-much-more-sophisticated-and-classy-than-you nose-in-the-air gallic ways?

    Ugh, how COULD you?

    Now, where was I? Ah yes, illogical and unnecessary irrational hatreds.

    Oh. Wait.....

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report Reply

  • Richard Llewellyn,

    Hayden; bible-bashing redneck.

    Couldn't agree more. The best description I heard was (maybe Jonathon Agnew?) describing Hayden walking out to open the innings, and behaving in such an over-the-top alpha male psychological warfare way that he was all but cocking a leg on the stumps.

    And Phil Gould. Can't stand his patronising presumption of automatic Australian NRL superiority and his certainty that nobody alive knows more about rugby league than he (or for that matter his dodo-like views on the sanctitude of Origin v International league).

    And Stephen Jones. Yes I know its a tiresome one-man circus act designed to wind up kiwi's, but damn he can be effective at that sometimes.

    And Gary Neville ......

    Mt Albert • Since Nov 2006 • 399 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    Ugh, how COULD you?

    It's cos he's got a crush on a french girl. And they have the nicest uniforms.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Jacqui Craig,

    Admitting to an irrational hatred seems a bit like giving in to it but here goes...

    All Australian sportspeople. yeah yeah sure I bet there might be a few who are true sportsmen/women but in the main they are classless, arrogant and bad losers. Shane Warne used to get me very stressed out - my husband would say "yeah but he's such a great cricketer" which considering I grew up in Canada and will never understand the finer points of cricket, didn't have much impact on me.

    That horrible horrible HORRIBLE Toyota ad with the little boy who goes driving and picks up his girlfriend. Don't ask me why because I know logically it's just an ad, but I hate it and that little boy with the intensity of a thousand white-hot suns.

    Auckland • Since Apr 2007 • 28 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Rowe,

    I hate the Welsh rugby team. With their Gavin "I'm fucking a pop star" Henson and his thousand shades of Beckham hair. Prick.

    But I really hate the Welsh because I was at the 1999 World Cup semi at Twickenham. I'd bought tickets from a scalper, and when I sat down, a dour old bastard asked where I got my tickets? "these seats were allocated to the Welsh Rugby Union, in't they?" I ignored him.

    Then, after the tragedy, I shook the hand of the Frenchman sat next to me and proceeded to file out with a very long face. "Oh well Boyo it's good for Northern Hemisphere rugby innit?" says old Taff behind me with a look of satisfaction on his face, which I ignored again. The fact that the leak-eating bastard had supported the French over the NZers, the only people that love rugby like the Welsh do, destroyed any feelings of warmth towards them on the rugby field. Pricks

    Lake Roxburgh, Central Ot… • Since Nov 2006 • 574 posts Report Reply

  • Angus Robertson,

    Holden Racing Team - sometimes just wish the whole damn company would drop off the face of the Earth, THIS is a good week.

    That horrible horrible HORRIBLE Toyota ad with the little boy who goes driving and picks up his girlfriend. Don't ask me why because I know logically it's just an ad, but I hate it and that little boy with the intensity of a thousand white-hot suns.

    cough - Hyundai add - cough

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 984 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,

    I can’t believe this thread has gone into a second page and no-one mentioned Cristiano Ronaldo.

    (Although Gary Neville was an inspired nomination)

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • Rachel Prosser,

    "I'm not sure about hatred, but I've always disliked BP petrol stations. I always avoided using them whenever possible......t. I had never stopped to think about why I disliked them, I just did."

    I never shopped at Shell. My family shopped at the Red or Blue petrol stations - not that you see Caltex any more. He didn't shop at green ones either, so our family didn't do well out of the "BPs the one place on earth, that you get service with a Smurf" campaign.

    I found out why we avoided Shell one day, when I asked my Dad. The answer was that his Dad said in 1953 (when my Dad was 7) that the Taxis in Te Awamutu went over to Shell Petrol. Then they started having engine trouble. So they switched back.

    Thereafter, my grandfather avoided Shell. And so my Father did too. So I picked up the habit, and just got in the habit of overlooking them. It was like when you looked for a petrol station, you didn't really see the rival stations.

    This, even when the whole family were cricket fans, would listen to the Shell cup and Shell trophy on the radio in the car in summer. And despite the fact that I loved going to Wellington from Wainuiomata and knew I we'd arrived when we saw the huge "Go well, Go Shell" sign as we exited the motorway.

    It was only a habit though, and Fly Buys helped to break it.

    Christchurch • Since Mar 2008 • 228 posts Report Reply

  • Rachel Prosser,

    Oh, and Wayne Smith.

    For scoring the try to take the shield of Wellington.

    When I was 13, and told that Dad had just got a job in Ashburton and we'd be moving south from Otorohanga, I remember saying "but Wayne Smith's the only All Black I don't like"

    It was because he scored the try that took the shield off Wellington. Turns out Mid Canterbury was a different team anyway.

    I got over my dislike of both Canterbury Rugby and Wayne Smith, and am a fan of one and a respecter of the other now.

    There's a meme - any examples of irrational hatreds turning into devotion?

    Christchurch • Since Mar 2008 • 228 posts Report Reply

  • Richard C,

    The effing Bath Rubgy Team (circa late eighties early nineties).

    Loathed the bloody lot of 'em.

    Partly because of the dour, meanspirited way they played the game, partly because of Gareth 'Coochie' Chilcott, but mainly because they were the one team that always, always managed to beat my beloved Gloucester. Who, let's face it, were equally dour but did have much better songs.

    This included the 1990 Pilkington Cup Final at Twickers (which I couldn't attend having come down with Glandular Fever) where, watching propped up on my sick-bed, they larruped us 48-6.


    Waiheke Island • Since Oct 2007 • 27 posts Report Reply

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