Posts by Jackie Clark
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Up Front: That's Inappropriate!, in reply to B Jones,
Yes, B. That is exactly it. Because no-one can ever imagine you being a bit naughty, you just aren't. Ha! Mind you, I've been smoking for 25 years, and there are still people who are surprised when I light up.
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Seems that society still thinks that women who have casual sex are dirty whores
Sing it, sister. Although I quite like the term “dirty whore”. Slovenly, slatternly…….I am all of the above. Only now it’s my house that gets the benefit of my dirty whoredom.
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Promiscuity is IMO a series of short term, uncommitted sexual relationships that don’t involve emotional intimacy. Examples would be one night stands or the tour de first year (that when people – usually women – have sex with plenty of young 18 year old first years – usually men – at university).
And, again, what is your point, Tess?
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And also, really? How in god's name are you going to stop kids from giving out sexual signals? They have hormones, and pheromones, and let's face it, biologically speaking they are hardwired and supposed to give out sexual signals. From about the age of 12 or so, actually.
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Tess thinks that promiscuity leads to an inability to form long-lasting monogamous relationships
Hang on. I’ll just tell my husband of 18 years that one. Yep. Thought so. He’s laughing like a drain. And may I just add, to anyone who may think similarly, my former promiscuity may very well have saved my marriage. Because when someone goes through intense chemo and radio, and it ravages the body, let's just say you're left with your memories. Apparently, I had enough promiscuous sex to last me a lifetime. Just as well, really.
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Then, your point would be?
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First of all, Jacqui, you aren't by any chance a Marsden girl, are you? Because that would be scary.
Secondly,I very seldom wear long pants.
Oh, I can attest to that. And when I first met you, I remember thinking how very endearing your shorts were. Just like you.
And finally. Tess - I have very rarely dressed up to attract men, I certainly have never worn short skirts, nor leather of any sort. There may have been a few cleavagey outfits in my 20's but that was because I liked my tits. And I was a full-on, hard out slut.
If someone wears a short skirt to school, yes there should be some teacherly intervention if it contravenes the dress code. Normally, one expects, a Dean would write a letter home to Mum and/or Dad to remind them of skirt lengths. Instead, what happened to her, was appalling. Her teacher went against most of the Code of Ethics that all registered teachers must adhere to. As such, words should be had with her.
As for skirt length/sexual availabilty etc. Do not conflate your personal experience onto this child. Anyone of any age of any gender should be able to wear what they like, when they like, and not be abused for it. I don't like it when young women wear revealing clothing. But they aren't my daughters, they aren't me, and if anyone were to act inappropriately toward them, I would defend them.
As someone who has been in terrible situations, late at night, a number of times in my young womanhood - and I wasn't wearing revealing clothing - I would have to say to you that it really doesn't matter what message we want to send with our clothing. I can guarantee you that the message you will never be sending is "Rape me", or "Abuse me". Not when you're 14. Not ever.
I was easy, honey, and believe me, I never wore a dress or a skirt, let alone a short one. -
Okay, I wrote this big long post, which I then, by sleight of hand, lost completely. Anyway, here is a link to the teachers' Code of Ethics . Read it carefully, if you can be bothered. The teacher at Newlands College was in serious breach of our Code, in my opinion.
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An interesting link. I must admit that for crayfish, putting them in the freezer where they go to sleep seems less cruel.
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Appalling. The whole bloody thing is appalling. To make such comments to a child is completely inappropriate, and from a teacher, ridiculously unprofessional. And then making her skirt length an issue when there are obviously other stuff the school, and parents, need to be looking at in the first place. Like, if she's missing class, why so? And if she is getting in fights, why would that be? And to suggest that the teacher in question was simply equipping her for life? What a very laughable excuse for poor teaching strategies. Breaking the uniform code is not a reason to make comment on a child's appearance.
If the young woman is, as the DomPost editorial suggests, heading in the wrong direction, then telling her she looks like a slut isn't helping her. It hinders her perception of self. And as educators, we should be looking at how we can broaden a child's horizons, not limit them.