Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Isn't It Romantic?

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  • Emma Hart,

    What about Daniel Craig and that Welsh Eoin Whathisname from all those BBC sailing dramas?

    Gruffudd. Not that I knew who you meant right away, of course.

    Daniel Craig is a bit blond.

    Def not Hugh or Colin.

    Spike or Angel? (Of course we were going there, it was only a matter of time.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Put me down for Elle MacPherson

    Okay. On Elle's behalf, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Beard,

    just too nice for me ... just too nice for me

    So, maybe some of the "brooding bad boy" stereotype from the romance novels did rub off on you then? I suppose that if said novels portray men as arrogant, emotionally unavailable cads then they may indeed play a valuable role in preparing young women for real life.

    OK, but my girlfriend is going to be pissed if she finds out.

    If I had a dollar for every time I'd thought that ... I might have enough cash to pay my legal bills.

    Ahem.

    For all of you who are geeking out on crumpet from some (presumably) SF series that I've never seen, I have just one word for you: Servalan.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    So, maybe some of the "brooding bad boy" stereotype from the romance novels did rub off on you then?

    An interesting theory with just one or two tiny flaws.

    I'm not a big romance novel reader. If any genre was going to influence me, it should have been scifi.

    I like brooding bad girls as well.

    So you may be on to something with that Servalan thing.

    I mean, does the Darcy thing 'work' for me? Yep. Would I want to live with the guy afterwards? Good gods no.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    So why don't we all resolve to give an anonymous gift to someone this year, just to make their day that little bit more magical?

    The most romantic thing that has happened to me in the past couple of years, was a random stranger in the cafeteria of the Bluebridge ferry, who spotted me being offended by some gross old men commenting on my, ah, physical attributes, folded a paper serviette into a rose, and handed it to me, saying "here, a rose for you". So sweet, so timely, and entirely unexpected. I still have the rose.

    Of course, I'm the girl who once kicked an ex for saying, after I lamented that no one would ever create great art for me said "That James Blunt guy wrote a song for you". Vomit.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Of course, I'm the girl who once kicked an ex for saying, after I lamented that no one would ever create great art for me said "That James Blunt guy wrote a song for you". Vomit.

    Oh blarf. You know who wrote a song 'for' me? The Sisters of Mercy.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Tim Darlington,

    And indeed: if I could read science-fiction novels like you’d eat fistfuls of popcorn and still not expect to be serving on a spaceship next to impossibly handsome incredibly intelligent delightfully emotionally-retarded men, why shouldn’t the same be true for the girls reading the pink books?

    Same here. Even more astounding: the reading mainstay of my primary school years was Commando war comics, and yet somehow I made it to adulthood without feeling the slightest urge to make Fritz eat hot lead, or for that matter to cause squinting, bandy-legged Japanese men to screech "Aiieeee!!!" as I give them their deadly just desserts. Has anyone carried out any research on exactly how that's possible?

    Since Nov 2006 • 54 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    Okay. On Elle's behalf, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.

    I love it when Elle talks trash to me

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • Stuart Coats,

    While we're here, has anyone ever been to a singles bar in the US (or anywhere else for that matter). And, if so, how does it differ from, say, going down the Loaded Hog on a Friday night and trying to score?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 192 posts Report Reply

  • Stuart Coats,

    I should say that my Loaded Hog days are well and truly behind me!

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 192 posts Report Reply

  • stephen walker,

    SoM?!!?

    omg, everyone hated that album when it came out (you would have been 14?) because the production was crap and their previous 12" singles had been so much better. but i thought it was ok. used to listen to it quite a bit. amphetimine logic is a good track, in an andrew eldritch sort of way. great song title though!

    recommended: Alice 12", Temple of Love 12"
    (SoM version of 1969 is screamingly excellent, imho)

    (one of my friends even bought a drum machine the same as they used on that album: DR-55)

    nagano • Since Nov 2006 • 642 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    Has anyone carried out any research on exactly how that's possible?

    I've always thought there was a PhD topic in "cultural representations of Germans and Japanese in Commando Comics". Winners of wars not only get to write the history books, but the comics that kids grow up reading.

    I wonder what German and Japanese children think of them.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6242 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Beard,

    I mean, does the Darcy thing 'work' for me? Yep. Would I want to live with the guy afterwards? Good gods no.

    Of course. I just hope you're the "Know who to shag and who to marry" type of woman, rather than the "Fall in love with a bad boy, then try to change him into a good boy" type. The latter is a recipe for disaster all round.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1040 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder,

    You know who wrote a song for me?

    You know who wrote a song for me?

    No-one, that's who.

    Not that I'm bitter.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 708 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    (one of my friends even bought a drum machine the same as they used on that album: DR-55)

    Doctor Avalanche!

    (you would have been 14?)

    Man... I was thirteen when First and Last and Always came out. I didn't hear any Sisters until 1990 though, so I started with Floodland.

    I just hope you're the "Know who to shag and who to marry" type of woman

    One largely works this out by trial and error.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    I forgot to mention before that in 12 years Amy and I have never done anything for Valentine's Day. And only partly because it's my birthday two days later.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2090 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    So why don't we all resolve to give an anonymous gift to someone this year, just to make their day that little bit more magical?

    Does marking my mother's birhday by sticking a few more pins in her voodoo doll count?

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12359 posts Report Reply

  • Megan Wegan,

    I forgot to mention before that in 12 years Amy and I have never done anything for Valentine's Day. And only partly because it's my birthday two days later.

    This year, I will be at a wedding. In Ashburton. If I'm the only single, cynical woman there, there could be tears*. Thank God I've got hot shoes to wear. (Sorry Emma.)


    *I am not sure who will be crying though, Probably me.

    Welly • Since Jul 2008 • 1275 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I forgot to mention before that in 12 years Amy and I have never done anything for Valentine's Day. And only partly because it's my birthday two days later.

    In fifteen years, my partner and I have never done anything for Valentine's Day. He says all the pink cherubs appear in the shops to remind him that it's my birthday three days later.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4619 posts Report Reply

  • Mikaere Curtis,

    Ditto the "never do anything for Valentine's Day". Mainly because it's our wedding anniversary four days earlier.

    Which would be today.

    We kind of got carried away at the kid's school's fundraising auction last year and ended up with a voucher for the French Cafe...I think I'll be late in for work tommorrow...

    Tamaki Makaurau • Since Nov 2006 • 522 posts Report Reply

  • Sayana,

    librarians, particularly in big branches, never, ever look at the books they're issuing to you. They don't care in the slightest what you're reading, and moreover are (mostly) trained not to comment without you saying something first

    Ummm - this is not necessarily true... Ok, probably we never said anything offensive to the person in question, but there were certainly giggles afterwards...


    On the subject of Valentine's Day, my husband and I have never really been in to it, except for our first year together - I gave him an inflatable tulip, and he gave me a coffe table. Our disinterest is partly due to the rampant commercialisation and bollocks of the occasion, and partly due to the fact that my husband had his birthday last week, followed the next day by our wedding anniversary.

    Oh, and could I have Colin Firth, Hugh Grant AND Angelina Jolie?

    Since Sep 2008 • 50 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Okay. On Elle's behalf, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny.

    Hah!

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    In fifteen years, my partner and I have never done anything for Valentine's Day. He says all the pink cherubs appear in the shops to remind him that it's my birthday three days later.

    Have we done the "snap" on the birthday timing yet?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2090 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Have we done the "snap" on the birthday timing yet?

    Our anniversary: the 15th.
    My birthday: the 20th.
    St. Valentine's Day: what is that?

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Jackie Clark,

    librarians, particularly in big branches, never, ever look at the books they're issuing to you. They don't care in the slightest what you're reading, and moreover are (mostly) trained not to comment without you saying something first.

    I'm on first name terms with my local librarians so we always have a good natter about what I'm reading, what they're reading, and other such things. I like my librarians, and don't tend to use the self service thingies. On the romantic valentines thing - not a goer in our house either, although my husband is very romantic. Just not in a conventional way. He recently made me a hysterisis loop ( a maori design they call a twist). Oh, and definitely Colin Firth.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report Reply

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