Cracker by Damian Christie

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Cracker: That's Not My Name

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  • Danielle,

    I play it all the time

    Snap! 'They call me rudeboy...'

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • chris,

    I've gotta say, the general fuss about all this and that fact it made headlines at all does say good things about New Zealands attitude to race, which although far from perfect, sets a hell of an example to the rest of the world.

    Mawkland • Since Jan 2010 • 1302 posts Report Reply

  • Jeremy Eade,

    Couldn’t sleep last night for the smell of oil and started thinking about this mess.

    The “hug a kid with unusual hair , who you usually give shit to”’ day bothers me as a concept. According to these small boys it promotes bullying in their world and they are the dudes I am listening to in all of this because I dig ‘em.

    Bullying is something we all need to get our head around. These kids are allowed to say, “fuck off”and to be listened to with a degree of empathy.

    But it’s just a promotion in the media world. These fun lovin media promotions are invented in order for our thin veil of commercial media to become their own news for a while, which to be honest kind of defeats the purpose of news. Great ideas like the insane wackiness of our own nudity, the complete irrationality of marrying a compete stranger and “strangely coloured hair person touching day “ come up .

    But look man, the bottom line is some kid is fucking unhappy about it . He’s having complete fucking strangers come up to him and touch him. He’s grabbed because it’s radio promotions day at the edge and the young dude is saying no.

    Now boomer people forget about your stinking oldtime childhood, we have told this generation of kids to do this shit, speak up and tell us how they feel, early childhood curriculum is full of self expression and confidence building activities, this is what we are trying to promote.

    But one day a year the kid is asked for no reason to be part of a radio ratings drive. Man, if someone hugged me and other kids I knew; grabbed me at a certain age ,in a way that frightened me, fists would be flying. That’s a pretty anxious time for a little dude and I don’t think they should have to negotiate the supposed wacky humour of an indiscriminate hug day invented by a buzzy promotions boy at the edge.

    So the father is upset his kid is upset. He uses a racist argument that dies in the uncomfortable world of racist definition and would have been wiser and more “media trained” if he concentrated on the emotions of his kid. It’s still a problem for the kid. The kid is a kid, he uses powerfully simple kid language, he calls other kids mean. Mean is a big fucking encompassing word for a kid, strangers touching you is a big fucking invasion for a small boy. You don’t have to put up with that.

    If this kid is pissed off his father has every right to be pissed off and to stand his corner. I hate the word media training. Maybe journalists should become better trained at talking to us. How can citizens media train anyway, should we prepare for the media on a weekly basis, like a civil defence drill, why the fuck are the media so hard to talk to and why do they hopelessly smudge simple issues many times for uncomfortable and underserved ratings.

    Also the peace and love liberal hippie in me can’t see what quality is bought to the discussion by calling a very agitated father an idiot. His kid says he is being bullied. That’s big emotions for a dad.

    The little boys stand there looking pretty sad .Frustratingly they can’t articulate the obvious response to dom harveys idea of the promotion being an amnesty day.

    The obvious response being to declare an amnesty day admits that these kids are use to being bullied for their uniqueness and opens up all the unhealthy shit that comes from being threatened in your youth . Mark Sainsbury, such a jocular nice big boy seems to have trouble considering the idea that these little boys are unhappy and confused.

    This kid says it is not on and wants something done, he says the promotion is a pain in the ass to him. The adults wink and laugh at him. Well done those kids for speaking up, lets hear more from the new generation y.

    Now Andy Haden’s use of the word darkie is just painfully dumb, but surely the dumber idea is his illusion to significant differences in racial intelligence. That’s just flat out racist but of course it’s rude to call someone racist because you might hurt their feelings.

    So redhead day is a kid bullying issue more than racism , but let’s not fool ourselves, we have a ragged history of bigotry across many skin colours. Our current 2010 hangups are pathetic enough but I know a local website and a comments section where the usual committed revolutionaries would almost certainly develop a keen bigotry against all these red head people if they just could work out what sinful, liberal overtaxed place they all come from. The sad news is both bullying and racism have the potential to make your day / life hell.


    ahh damn it I’ve made myself look concerned. I hate that. I’m no liberal hippie. I’m off to stare in Glenn Becks eyes.

    auckland • Since Mar 2008 • 1112 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Mark Sainsbury, such a jocular nice big boy seems to have trouble considering the idea that these little boys are unhappy and confused.

    To be fair, he seems to have trouble considering almost any idea.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Graeme Edgeler,

    damn it I’ve made myself look concerned. I hate that. I’m no liberal hippie. I’m off to stare in Glenn Becks eyes.

    According to ABC News' Senior White House Correspondent Jake Tapper, Glenn Beck is a voice of reason. Well, once anyway. But in contrast to Rudy Giuliani, and Eric Holder, which is a plus for him.

    Wellington, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 3215 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    Couldn’t sleep last night for the smell of oil

    Yes, it's rather hard to watch each night on the News as a snippet of world information against a plethora of our (NZ) important issues. I mean, never mind, Gaza, how about the Rugby, the football, and murder and weather. For someone who has never watched Sainsbury, but have noted comments now and before on these here threads, I can see why the format of his show is sensationalist. It, follows the News which seems to have the same mindless sameness. Isn't this modern programming? (and I'd thank Fox) Isn't this why Dad brought the kids on in the first place? Isn't it our duty to comment?
    Meanwhile, more wildlife washes up on the sands of US tourist spots.

    " Out damn'd spot"
    Mabeth, Act 5. Scene 1.

    ahh damn it I’ve made myself look concerned.

    And then that happens. :)

    To be fair, he seems to have trouble considering almost any idea.

    Fair? Fair you say??? ;)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Cruel but fair. ;)

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Graeme Edgeler,

    It, follows the News which seems to have the same mindless sameness. Isn't this modern programming? (and I'd thank Fox) ...

    There is a difference between Fox, and Fox News. Similar to the difference between Prime TV and Sky News in New Zealand.

    Although in this instance, I suspect it isn't fair to blame/credit either of them. Fox doesn't do National news (though some Fox affiliates do local news), and the dumbing down of the news predates the Fox News ascendancy by quite some time.

    Wellington, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 3215 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    and the dumbing down of the news predates the Fox News ascendancy by quite some time.

    Why and who is responsible for this dumbing down, and why was it so necessary, or is it just fashionable? I'd suggest then, that Fox's name/ reputation and their rubbish peddled has given rise to much of the same behaviour in worldwide trash telly and frankly, it's insulting to intelligence. Don't y'all think now?

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Geoff Lealand,

    Why and who is responsible for this dumbing down

    Much can be blamed on the American 'consultants' (aka blinkered-vision bozos) TVNZ brought out, to restructure its news, in the 1980s/1990s.

    Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2562 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    The all whites are mostly poms, right? At least, I was told that by a bloke in a pub in Christchurch. They have a quota of no more than 3 players that don't sound like they've just stepped out of Coro.

    Winning formula

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 5550 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Much can be blamed on the American 'consultants' (aka blinkered-vision bozos) TVNZ brought out, to restructure its news, in the 1980s/1990s.

    A foreign egg in our nest, you might say.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    The Governor-General, by virtue of being Commander-in-Chief of New Zealand, shall have such powers and may exercise and discharge such duties and obligations relating to any armed forces raised and maintained under section 5 as pertain to the office of Commander-in-Chief.

    Hey Graeme, somewhat off topic, but could you clarify what the practical consequence of that is? Given that it goes on to say:

    For the purposes of the general responsibility of the Minister in relation to the defence of New Zealand, the Minister shall have the power of control of the New Zealand Defence Force, which shall be exercised through the Chief of Defence Force.

    which sets out the de-facto chain of command.

    Is it just a legal knee-bow to the monarchy, or does it have a purpose?

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 5550 posts Report Reply

  • Yamis,

    I went in to bat for my three red heads in my classes that I teach at school but all three looked at me like I was a weirdo. They think it's great that they get hugs all day.

    I tried to point out to them and others that not every redhead wants to be hugged by complete strangers and that some might be annoyed or offended by it. They kinda got it but I'll be having the same conversation next year.

    On the Haden thing, I was watching it LIVE and I had the impression when he said it that he was implying that that was the Crusaders view towards the Polynesian players, that we can only recuit three of the 'darkies' a year. But he had the chance to state that later but he didn't so the only conclusion that you can draw is that it was a word that he regularly uses and has no problem with.

    As an aside several of the recent Crusaders Super XIV sides have had 7 or 8 Pacific Island players in them.

    What you haven't all heard is that the Blues have a secret policy whereby they can only recruit three decent players a year and the rest have to be hopeless.

    Since Nov 2006 • 903 posts Report Reply

  • Jeremy Eade,

    Using the term "darkies" to describe our polynesian citizens is so basic and dumb. I now feel even less warmth to an Auckland rugby scene I used to adore, an adoration formed in part towards the efforts of players like our great locks of old , like Mr Haden.But you are not a statesman Andy.

    How many pacific island tribal groups must there be out there? How many different philosophies, environments and influences.As varied as the freckly white tribes of europe for sure.This is Auckland.

    The browning of new zild is an inevitable fate for a strip of islands sitting in the low south pacific.

    We should be the Rome of the South Pacific not the last bastion of european geographical delusion.

    auckland • Since Mar 2008 • 1112 posts Report Reply

  • Jeremy Eade,

    GOOD TV

    I just saw Guy Williams with Paul Henry, that is funny on so many levels. This guy could be really good, he just played the thing so well and in the end Henrys bagging the free market principles he usually loves banging on about, desperately trying to help out his guest, "rightwing boy" .Funny.

    auckland • Since Mar 2008 • 1112 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Quite Ali G. Despite the bluster of the official media release that Mr Henry spotted the fake during the interview, I reckon he got well punked.

    Though "libertarian" should have rung some bells after the all-powerful young Actoid Rick Giles graced our screens recently. 'Jay Pryor' was more coherent than that (not that it's saying much) but I certainly didn't see any sign that his oafish host had figured out he wasn't the real deal.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • Kumara Republic,

    Quite Ali G. Despite the bluster of the official media release that Mr Henry spotted the fake during the interview, I reckon he got well punked.

    Or Borat or Bruno for that matter.

    Or maybe even the Sodomobile. ;D

    I'm starting to feel a sense of hope.

    The southernmost capital … • Since Nov 2006 • 5446 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Ae, but it doesn't say much for conventional politics when we have to rely on C4 and comedy proteges to bring the smart activism

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • Sam F,

    Despite the bluster of the official media release that Mr Henry spotted the fake during the interview, I reckon he got well punked [...] I certainly didn't see any sign that [the] oafish host had figured out he wasn't the real deal.

    Ah, but apparently the weaker an argument is the harder it is to counter:

    "You couldn't have a decent argument with him because he didn't have a reasoned, thought-out argument himself so there was nothing you could really counter, there was no opportunity for intellectual debate"...

    Uh-huh. I'm sure all involved are disappointed that Breakfast's stonking record of rigorous intellectual exchange has finally been spoilt.

    A shame also that Williams clearly didn't throw in any foibles of personal appearance to bring out Henry's barely concealed inner 13-year-old.

    Elsewhere in the Herald story, the show is apparently reviewing its vetting procedures, perhaps adding a couple of phonecalls on top of the routine Googling. Funfact: setting up a website is not really an impenetrable web of deception by a reasonable measure, especially not one as laughably weak as this.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1611 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Funfact: setting up a website is not really an impenetrable web of deception by a reasonable measure, especially not one as laughably weak as this.

    Even if it had been a much more elaborate fake, the "they had a website" defense remains my favourite part of the story.

    (Actually, almost: the best part of the story, as David Slack has pointed out, is that it exposed Key's support for commercial whaling.)

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    Or possibly Key's penchant for agreeing with whomever he is talking to...

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    I just saw Guy Williams with Paul Henry, that is funny on so many levels.

    Yeah, wonder if anyone would be seeing the meta-satirical performative humour if Williams really was some right-wing loon pretending to be gay, or a feminist or a greenie.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    No. Only things that mock people I despise are funny to me.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    From that Herald story, our fake spokesperson rejects tvnz's face-saving claims:

    Williams rejected Henry's response.

    "Paul Henry did not catch on to me. It was not until an hour later after the show had finished that they stripped it off the internet.

    "[The news bulletin] had my story in it every 20 minutes up until they found out it was a hoax.

    "I'm very opposed to the way these shows carry themselves, you just see the crap they're putting on there and I thought: 'I'll give you some more crap' ..."

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

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