Posts by Deborah
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Regarding that Boganette thread: Thoughts?:
There's a long nuanced discussion there, and the quotes that have been pulled out and pasted here aren't from Boganette's own comments. Some of the more dubious comments there (eg. the slut-shaming ones) have come from people like Muerk (known around these parts as Tess Rooney), and an anonymous commentator. Boganette herself is arguing something much more like Megan's and Emma's position, as are several of the other women who have been commenting in the thread.
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In some book I read once, the author has a character who is an older woman "who no longer took the trouble to dress out of fashion." The description has stayed with me, 'though for the life of me I cannot recall book or author now.
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Up Front: Say When, in reply to Bart Janssen,
[Emma's] desire to conform
Hmmm.... umm.... are we talking about the same Emma here?
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Up Front: Say When, in reply to Tom Beard,
if I’d got a haircut with a particular look in mind, and it didn’t suit me, I’d rather people told me rather than snigger behind my back.
Yes, but that's a technical mismatch between what you want to achieve, and what you have achieved, not an injunction to conform to a particular ideal.
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Up Front: Say When, in reply to recordari,
Expressing appreciation is fine, mostly (because telling a complete stranger of the opposite sex that he looks fabulous could be interpreted in all sorts of ways, offensive to both speaker and speakee, so really, you do need to exercise some judgement on this).
Telling people what they ought to do, especially so that they fulfill the speaker’s gender norms / expectations, is full of fail.
Actually, even saying, “If you want to look more feminine, then grow your hair longer,” could be problematic, because of the way it links into cultural definitions of femininity, and how women ought to be ( mutatis mutandis for definitions of masculinity). It can all be very tricky.
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At the risk of being shot down in flames…
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Keep the longer locks, ladies, and it does wonders to maintain a more youthful look and your femininity, no matter what your height or weight.Well, I'll rise to that, Pat.
Lay off with the instructions about what to do! That's the point of what so many people have been saying here, that it's not about trying to look youthful or feminine to other people but about feeling good about ourselves, from the inside.
That's precisely why my hair is short, and dyed a loud shade of red, because it makes me feel good. And to hell with what anyone else says.
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In the room the women come and go
Talking of Michelangelo....For I have known them all already, known them all:—
Have known the evenings, mornings, afternoons,
I have measured out my life with coffee spoonsTriple merge.
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resurrecting the plunger
There's nothing wrong with good plunger coffee. The usual rules apply: use freshly roasted beans, grind them just before use, keep your equipment clean.
but not really to my taste.
This is what we have been teaching our daughters to say when confronted by food they don't like. Not, "Yuck! That tastes disgusting", but, "Thank you, but it's not really to my taste."
I haven't yet found good coffee in Palmerston North, 'though I haven't been cafe hopping all that much either. Anyone got any helpful suggestions?
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Sigh. With contentment. I'm delighted that you will be posting here, Craig.
I was 11 in 1977, and the thrilling, rumbling awe produced by the battle cruiser flying over my head still stounds me. It was absolutely marvellous, and nothing in movie special effects has matched it since. It was the shock wave of an entirely new approach to making movies.
Hyperbole, I suppose. But it's hard to capture just how remarkable that first sequence in Starwars IV was. You young fullas have grown up with special effects, but for those of us who have four or more decades under our expanding belts, it was a revelation.
Wednesday’s post is a joint review of The King’s Speech
You will report on whether any shirts are removed, or decorative ponds swum through in frustration?
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Oh, Emma. I'm like so many of your friends here - I have tears running down my face, for you, for your family, for your mum, and for the beauty of your writing. It is a fine tribute, and it shouts loud and clear, this woman was deeply loved by her daughter.