The quote from the policeman in this article:

I have never seen a person so drunk in my life

Reminds me of a story that was told to me by a proffessor at Canterbury Law School

A notable member of Christchurch's white bread community was arrested and charged with drunk driving, and hired the services of one of the best barristers in town, pleading not guilty.

The prosecution case proceeded as planned; until the flash barrister stood up to cross-examine the doctor who had taken the evidential sample of blood from the “innocent” accused.

“Come now doctor” the barrister began, “my client wasn’t that drunk was he?” The doctor, somewhat shocked, stared blankly for a second.

The barrister continued, “My client hardly appeared drunk to you, isn’t that right?”
“Are you kidding!” the doctor exclaimed, “He was so intoxicated he didn’t know what he was doing!”
The triumphant lawyer turned to the judge and said “I make a motion to dismiss this case on the grounds that my client, given the testimony of the police doctor, cannot have had the intention to drink and drive.”

The case was dismissed forthwith.

As an aside and having registered specially to make this comment - I am very surprised to see html not supported here - it is a global standard and your method seems beta'ish