Posts by Helen T

  • Up Front: Get Your Hand Off It,

    Ugh, To Kill A Mockingbird. I got a detention over that book.

    (Throwing it on the desk mid-lesson and calling the author a hack then getting into an hour long "debate" with the English Lit teacher maaaaay have had something to do with it...)

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: The Up Front Guide to Parenting,

    I'm doing an Open University degree in Politics, Philosopy and Economics. I'm already unemployable but I thought I'd compound it *g*

    I did actually do what my parents wanted at Uni, for a month. It ended spectacularly badly.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Take Strictly, as Directed,

    Not bad. I think it's Trinity on that comment thread who says, look okay, all you not-kinkies go away and work out what you want to be called, and then we'll call you that. In the meantime...

    It is Trinity indeed *goes back to reading said thread*

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Take Strictly, as Directed,

    Aha! Also NSFW. Also black.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Take Strictly, as Directed,

    And where oh where can I buy me some black dildo candles? I think they'd be the perfect conversation piece for the next dinner party.

    Well, there's this (Totally NSFW) but it's not black.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Take Strictly, as Directed,

    The British legal system, in an effort to be able to prosecute perpetrators of domestic violence, can now bring charges even if the victim doesn't want to. Which raises all sorts of questions about people involved with BDSM as noted in the example.

    I really, really wish we'd stop trying to regulate what goes on in people's bedrooms, as long as it's consensual, except then I have to add on caveats and kind of lose the point.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Public Address Medical…,

    Okay, so I just had to explain to a bunch of WoW geeks, in the middle of a pub (hey, they have free WiFi), why I'm laughing.

    They got confused (and somewhat upset) around the words brain tumour. Mark, being in the loop, just giggled. Especially at the Teegan/Nyssa comments.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: The British Are Coming,

    Within minutes of my putting this column up, a friend of mine had produced this. It's crushed velvet, which is a bit... whatever the goth equivalent of twee is, but the colour is good and the cut is almost but not quite right.

    Emo? *snorts* Okay not the word we're looking for here but I couldn't resist. Also, I've got to say it, who gets winter coat in velvet? I mean, hello, rain. Or snow. Wet velvet is not fun - says the girl who got caught in velvet and lace skirt in a sudden downpour last Whitby...

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: The British Are Coming,

    Me too me too! Would trample hoards for such a coat! If we can imagine it, it surely must exist somewhere in this universe?

    My ideal is the same, except in green (goes with the green hair). My mission for this year is to get good enough with a sewing machine to *make* one. If this happens there will be much rejoicing, and probably then whoring out of services.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: The British Are Coming,

    **The British Are Coming**

    We are? I didn't get the memo. Damnit, people have got to stop leaving me off the mailing list.

    It's not my Perfect Coat. That's a tailored Victorian-style purple frock coat. I didn't buy that because it doesn't exist. One day I will be rich, and cause it to exist. Try-hard Goths everywhere will weep with gratitude and use my picture as a screen-saver. In fact, I might well commission my own fashion label, called "Fuck It, It Fits Me". Fuck It will make DD-cup push-up bras, because why the hell wouldn't you? If anyone knows a structural engineer who'll need a job in about 2018, let me know.

    You've been reading my sewing notebook again haven't you. Although I think Companies House might have an issue with that label name.

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

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