Poll Dancer by Keith Ng

No secrets here.

I have just been advised by the PM's Press Secretary that there are no plans to release any dirt files, that Labour does not keep dirt files, and that any reports to the contrary are untrue and malicious.

The comes after inquiries from the press gallery asking after this dirt file. Geez guys, thanks for getting me into trouble!

For the record (and this was how I replied), I wasn't suggesting that Labour was going to unload its dirt, I was simply saying that Labour was going to unload something, and it certainly has dirt (in a file or otherwise), and I went on to explain why it was unlikely that it would unload the dirt this weekend. There are, incidentally, plenty of things that Labour can unload that is not dirt.

My biggest concern now is that Labour has been spooked enough (and it has enough of its paw-prints over whatever will be leaked) to not release whatever it was they were going to release, thus rendering my report a self-falsifying one. Then Labour, National *and* the rest of the Gallery will hate me for giving them ulcers, heart attacks, and extra work respectively.

One member of the gallery I spoke to this evening put it well: "It's a sign of these sensitive times."

All I can say is, if Labour doesn't release "it" now, then we'll *know* that "it" was really an icky dirtball.

At least that's the best spin I can put on it, now that my mini-scoop has backfired on me. Bugger.

(And please, won't someone pick up the stuff about the surplus? Pretty please? It's genuinely more important and solidly proved and argued. Sigh. If anyone needs me, I'll be at the bar.)