With talk of a coup in the air, our Prime Minister is disinclined to visit Fiji next week. If they can't vouch for her personal safety, she says, she's staying home. Fair enough, too. There's nothing funny about a bunch of heavily armed soldiers bundling you into the Toyota Hilux and carting you into the compound.
The TV news tonight somewhat archly informed us that you and I, however, are free to come and go from Nadi at will. MFAT has no words of warning for us.
That could be because the putative provocateur and duly-appointed military commander of the nation, Commodore Voreque Bainimarama, or Frank to his friends, is not in country right now, as they say in the war movies.
MFAT probably don't want to spoil your holiday, but a little preparation goes a long way. If you should happen to notice Frank walking past the airport duty free store, you might want to think about getting back on the plane.
Names and faces are never easy to remember, of course, especially when the local language is not your own, so if you're soon bound for the Fiji sun, you may want to save this cut-out-and-keep Who's Who in the Coup chart. Pop it into your suitcase with your nail clippers and hair gel, and bula!
Dangerous
Frank Bainimarama
A Little Dangerous
Frank, a Brahman, and Ana 
Not Even Vaguely Dangerous
Bananarama
Barney, Brahma, Bananas
UPDATES, related and not.
Fastidious Eighties chronicler Robyn Gallagher writes to clarify:
Bananarama may not be dangerous, but they are FIERCE.
Believe it, yo.
Meanwhile, washing up elsewhere on wilder and angrier shores of the blogosphere is this interesting flotsam: a Google AdSense ad for the Labour Party on the "No Royal Assent to Electoral Act Violations" online petition site. Two questions come to mind:
1. Does the Labour Party really want to underwrite Blair's democratic endeavours?
2. Would a Google AdSense invoice meet the new definition of funding entitlements for parliamentary purposes?