Posts by Jackie Clark

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  • Legal Beagle: Think it possible that you…,

    I have one thing to say. And it is this. The argument about free speech being highly gendered that several here have commented on.....Public Address is a wonderful forum for us all. A forum that values and encourages civilised and selfmoderated discussion. Even in this community, however, the gendered voice is strong. We've had this discussion, around the predominance of "bloke" threads, several times. Ironically, Graeme, this entire thread makes manifest that argument. Men, traditionally speaking, are heard more than women. Their voices are louder, their arguments more robust, their attitudes more gladiatorial. This community has had it's fair share of that for a number of reasons. I would posit that womens' voices - in threads like this (and I think it's fair to say that the entire discussion on soical media around rape culture has followed this trend) - have been muted. Graeme, women have been fighting for centuries to be heard. And sometimes, a sister just gets tired. When you have to fight every day for your views to be deemed valid and worthy of listening to, let alone factoring in the dynamics of speech - women are taught fairly early, in general, not to shout/agitate to get what they want - it is nigh on impossible to be able to shout loud enough sometimes. When you talk about people waiting their turn, that sounds so civilised. And yet. Free speech is available - pragmatically - only really to those who have the loudest voices, and that tends to be men. Do you know, in regards to Gio's fine efforts, that I sat here, at one point, and thought "Good. Let the men fight for us." I'm 49, and for all of those years, I have fought to have my voice heard. Fought against a society that still doesn't value the opinions of women - we see it every day. To hear our voices, in that case, sometimes, Graeme, you have to be quiet, so you can hear us. All the men who wade in on our behalf, who get outraged on our behalf, and all those who speak from a position of slightly distanced, and academic, interest....need to shut up. Just shut up. And listen. It may take a while - there are centuries of conditioning that we women have to wade through, always. But we get there. So no, Graham, there is no free speech when you're a woman. It always costs dearly. So please don't tell me/us that free speech always has a consequence. I fight it every day.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: Friday Music: The First Time,

    My first concert was, I believe, not really a concert. Sweetwaters when I was about 18 or 19. So around 1982/3? The best concert I ever went to though was around the same time – Dire Straits at Western Springs (fooled you! you thought I was going to say Elton John. Ha!) I have always loved them, and no-one can tell me otherwise. We went in our flatmate's little Triumph, and he was a bit drinky I think driving us home, but sobered up when we came across a car in flames on Ponsonby Rd.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Capture: The Dark Arts, in reply to Jolisa,

    Oh is that what it was? We were wondering.......

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Good Friends, in reply to TracyMac,

    It's a very delicate negotiation, I believe. But one worth trying, all the same.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Good Friends,

    The Ring Theory. Otherwise known as the Kvetching, or Comfort, Circle. I know it well. We used this when Carol got ill, and then when she died. I emailed everyone in our circle this article,. (There was a joke that I should assign which circle people were in as they came to the hospital. I did not.) It helped Carol's husband, and her other best friend, and I, very much. I had only thought of it in terms of illness though, Emma, but of course it would be applicable to any situation where your friend's in some distress. Thanks for that. As always.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Cracker: Lundy and Me.,

    I can well and truly say that the Ellis case affected my career in a number of ways. We are now allowed to change a child's clothes unwitnessed, but still not supposed to toilet them unsupervised. Load of old bollocks. Most children have enough difficulty toileting with one person present, let alone two.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: Friday Music: Weird Auckland, in reply to Robyn Gallagher,

    thanks Robyn, more stuff for her mum's online scrapbook

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Capture: Dogs Love Cameras Too, in reply to Hebe,

    Oh Hebe. So glad! Much love to you all.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Cracker: Lundy and Me.,

    I'm of the opinion that we have a history of convicting people of crimes because they just aren't likeable at all, or are seen as strange in some way. See Lundy, Bain, and Watson particularly. I don't know whether Lundy did it or not. As with Bain, the only people who know, really, are the men themselves. I have no investment in either of these cases, and just find it very strange that so many people do - totally unrelated to the families, and to whom verdicts of guilty or innocent actually make no difference. I know it's interesting to some, but it just makes me uneasy, this national rush to judgement.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: Rape and unreason, in reply to Russell Brown,

    To your reader, I would say: thank you for telling your story. Your voice is heard, and appreciated. Never let the bastards win.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3124 posts Report Reply

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