Cracker by Damian Christie

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Cracker: Wallywood

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  • giovanni tiso,

    Well that's even more silly. What are you going to watch it on if you're leaving your computer behind?

    There's a computer on the capsule.

    __If I was to be forced to take only one movie, I'd take one I haven't already seen.__

    Good luck, man; they're mostly rubbish.

    Wild applause.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report

  • Russell Brown,

    I can see you now. Up in space, by yourself, holding your wee USB stick in front of you. "Man I should have brought a book!"

    You don't already have a USB port in your neck? Man, Dunedin is really the end of the Earth ...

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22850 posts Report

  • 3410,

    lol

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report

  • BenWilson,

    There's a computer on the capsule.

    Don't forget to bring the right codec for your AVI.

    It's hard to imagine any kind of data that would be more wasteful to bring than a movie.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • B Jones,

    Also, it better have the subtitles if it's a foreign film.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 976 posts Report

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    either Citizen Kane or Young Frankenstein. There is no time to compress them so that they will both fit.

    Well I would prefer something a little more cheerful.How about a nice children's movie. :)
    Yes, it has sub-titles.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report

  • Craig Ranapia,

    BTW, anyone pick up on the delicious irony-gasm of the very media outlets sneering at this sign as being "cheesy and parochial" getting rather drippy knickered and awfully parochial about Temuera Morrison and Taika Waititi being cast in supporting roles in 'Green Lantern'.

    BTW, much as I love Tem any comic book geek would tell you that you're really stretching it to call Abin Sur a "key role" -- which it is in one sense, but not really much in the way of screen time.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report

  • Caleb D'Anvers,

    Perhaps we can use this to settle the film-quality conundrum, once and for all ...

    London SE16 • Since Mar 2008 • 482 posts Report

  • 3410,

    My problem here is that I can't see how objective, absolute categories can also be historical.

    Can't you just say "taking into account the period"? Absolute speed is clearly not the best way to compare Owens and Patton; something more like 'relative dominance in the field' seems a better measure.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report

  • philipmatthews,

    BTW, anyone pick up on the delicious irony-gasm of the very media outlets sneering at this sign as being "cheesy and parochial" getting rather drippy knickered and awfully parochial about Temuera Morrison and Taika Waititi being cast in supporting roles in 'Green Lantern'.

    I know. I haven't been this excited since Rawiri Paratene was cast in Brett Leonard's straight-to-video Man Thing.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 656 posts Report

  • giovanni tiso,

    Can't you just say "taking into account the period"? Absolute speed is clearly not the best way to compare Owens and Patton; something more like 'relative dominance in the field' seems a better measure.

    But why do that? Isn't the faster runner the objectively better runner?

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report

  • BenWilson,

    No, it's how they felt when they ran, and the message they conveyed. Also, the originality of the running is very important. We need to see running in a different way. It's not just about speed, but also about the narrative arc, the way the runners interacted and developed through the race.

    Anyone can be a champion runner. You just have to train heaps and be naturally gifted. That side of it really doesn't come into things, indeed excessive training devalues the runner, makes their efforts mechanical and formulaic.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report

  • giovanni tiso,

    Nicely done sir.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report

  • Rich Lock,

    But would the best runner be the best athlete full stop?

    Or do we have separate 'runners' out as a subset of 'athletes', and put the 'pole vaulters' over there, and the 'swimmers' over here, and the 'shotputters' in another separate area? And then try to come up with some sort of empirical set of measurable standards to objectively define 'best athlete' which applies to all of them?

    No, it's how they felt when they ran, and the message they conveyed. Also, the originality of the running is very important. We need to see running in a different way. It's not just about speed, but also about the narrative arc, the way the runners interacted and developed through the race.

    You've been watching that 'Chariots of fire' again, haven't you?

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report

  • Russell Brown,

    Can't you just say "taking into account the period"? Absolute speed is clearly not the best way to compare Owens and Patton

    Also, neither of them are as fast as a cyclist (or, for that matter, as fast as me on a bike) so who would care?

    (Point being that we apply relative rather than absolute measures all the time. I know a really tall bloke but he's nothing compared to the Sky Tower. Just tall for a human. Owens was peerlessly fast for his time.)

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22850 posts Report

  • philipmatthews,

    But would the best runner be the best athlete full stop

    Or do we have separate 'runners' out as a subset of 'athletes', and put the 'pole vaulters' over there, and the 'swimmers' over here, and the 'shotputters' in another separate area? And then try to come up with some sort of empirical set of measurable standards to objectively define 'best athlete' which applies to all of them??

    But why stop at athlete? Why not the best human? Best athlete over there, best surgeon over there, best mechanic over there, best chef over there and so on.

    Which proves nothing other than that the running/cinematography analogy wasn't much good to start with.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2007 • 656 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel,

    I can see you now. Up in space, by yourself, holding your wee USB stick in front of you. "Man I should have brought a book!"

    or as Ron Cobb depicted it ...

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Martin Lindberg,

    Why not the best human?

    I'm waiting for New Zealand's Next Top Human to hit the screen soon.

    Stockholm • Since Jul 2009 • 802 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel,

    But would the best runner be the best athlete full stop?

    how about athletes vs aesthetes

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Rich Lock,

    Why not the best human?

    Modesty prevents, old chap...

    Which proves nothing other than that the running/cinematography analogy wasn't much good to start with.

    No, but it does help to support my hypothesis that there is no way of empirically/objectively measuring what is a 'good' film.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I'm waiting for New Zealand's Next Top Human to hit the screen soon.

    I'm waiting for page 17.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report

  • Sacha,

    Catching up I'm struck by a more basic question - why on earth the need to apply any notion of "best" or "better"?

    I enjoy discussing movies, music, etc - not so I can rank them, more so I have a better idea what I might like next. Where they fit in culturally also interests me, and I'm certainly not a complete relativist about it.

    Not everyone brings the same motivations but I wonder how many spend this much energy trying to decide whether movie A is "better than" Movie B? Except maybe when they're choosing what to see/hear next..

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    Not everyone brings the same motivations but I wonder how many spend this much energy trying to decide whether movie A is "better than" Movie B?

    But Sacha, this is Public Address!

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report

  • Sacha,

    I believe that was Danyl's point..

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • giovanni tiso,

    I know a really tall bloke but he's nothing compared to the Sky Tower.

    He might be if you put a giant needle on his head.

    Aucklanders... sheesh.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report

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