Posts by Jackie Clark

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  • Hard News: The Casino,

    Islander - some days I pinch myself that I get to come to a place where I have the opportunity to have discourse with people that I greatly admire. That's all.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Casino,

    Oh, and lest I forget, I'm with Russell. I find casinos joyless, dreary places. I'm incredibly bummed that Sky City also has a great theatre.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Hard News: The Casino,

    I have no legal knowledge about Kindles or copyrights, nor am I an author. So I won't venture to comment on those things. What I do want to say is this. No-one on this forum has the right to address someone by their first name, when, in fact, they choose to use a pseudonym. I don't believe that's fair, nor is it good internet etiquette. We are incredibly honoured that people who are of great cultural importance in this nation choose to post here. There are a few. Some choose to use their "real" names, some do not. Let's all respect that. I fear that should people not want to be "outed" they will not continue to come here, and give us their valuable points of view.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Missionary Position,

    Then there are the apples.

    We love our apples, right? We're famous for it. And you know, if you cut an apple in half horizontally, there's a pentacle inside?

    I quite often cut apples, for the kids at kai time, in a horizontal manner. It's actually a cool trick cos kids don't expect to see a flower in the middle of their fruit. You say it's a pentacle? That works even better. Thanks for that!

    It's just that when the Hare Krishnas knock on my door, they bring samosas.

    I used to think the HK's were wonderful, mostly because they had a restaurant up the top of Queen St that, when I was a poor student, provided many a cheap and nourishing meal. I changed my mind when I met a few to talk with, who discussed what they really believe in. (It's a bit like everyone who loves the Dalai Lama and then get all shocked when they think about what some of his beliefs are.)

    I haven't had the same experience you have, but wondering if maybe being a member of a relatively small (and seemingly shrinking) group is forcing these religious folk to be more up front about it?

    Are you talking about religos being a shrinking group, Morgan? Cos in my VHO, they are breeding and are to be found in unpleasantly increasing numbers all around the place. I feel more and more set upon by people like this. My advice to people whose god(s) I don't believe in? Piss off and leave me alone. I have a very strong set of spiritual beliefs, and they don't involve an old geezer with a long white beard sitting on a cloud. Nor do they involve convincing people that edicts, that are patently humanly constructed to keep people you don't like - like women and such - down, come directly from said old geezer. What don't these people get about the concept of spirit being intangible?

    I've found that barking loudly like a dog gets JW's, Mormons and the like to leave you alone. Quite quickly.

    You know what? After my last comment, I have to admit we don't get door knockers of the holy variety anymore. It may have something to do with the fact that the last testifiers to the goodness of their church were innocently to be found peddling their beliefs when they knocked on my door. And I talked to them for half an hour about my flavour of spirituality. We talked, they nodded a bit, laughed, then left. And have never been seen again. Me? Talk the hind leg off a donkey? Never!

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Holland Diaries, Pt 1,

    But I could be provocative and ask who wants to foster connection, and why?

    Of course, Hilary. I had asked myself that. A valid question indeed. Let me think on that one!

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Holland Diaries, Pt 1,

    And, I should add, what of those children who are on the autism spectrum? I would be interested to know how you foster connection with those children who find it difficult to deal with the concepts of what we see as social ablility.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Holland Diaries, Pt 1,

    the most difficult part for me was maintaining intense eye contact, which let me feeling vulnerable and exposed. Clearly I am used to using language in a way that deflects attention from myself, a language culture where people read your face so intently doesn't allow this kind of distancing.

    You raise an excellent point, Ali. Very few of us use verbal language, in a group setting, that tells anyone who we really are, and if we do, too often, most people are so used to not reading body language, and more used to just using superficial cues, that we often end up feeling unseen .To be seen completely, people have to stop and really look at you. Look you in the eye, or in cultures where that is not appropriate, be able to listen very carefully to your words. So to be unable to hear what another person is saying, obviously requires intense scrutiny of that other's lips, or their hands , or, as you said, of their eyes. And yet. Do deaf people feel that the only people, most of the time, that really see them are the members of their own community? That you can be who you really are only with those who also feel unseen or unheard? Is it fair or right to lump everyone who has hearing loss, together? Of course not. We all strive to be seen as individuals. To be seen, or heard, or sensed, for who we really are, underneath all the words - spoken with our mouths or our hands. The soul of us. And, for those of us who are seeing, you can only ever do that, if you look into another being's eyes - deaf or not. All those children who do not hear, all those children that hear but whose brains scramble the words, all the children who cannot speak, - either because the words get jumbled in their mouths, or because their words are locked inside them - and all those children who do not communicate in a way we think of as "normal" . All those children who cannot communicate with the rest of the world, without huge frustration. Distancing ourselves is something we teach ourselves as children, when the world gets too much. It's connection with each other that we need to practise. We could all, those of us who have sight, do okay if we just looked in each others' eyes a little more.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Holland Diaries, Pt 1,

    Add that to a few basic greetings and questions, and it wouldn't take too long while providing people with an opening.

    Interestingly enough,signing works really well with babies. I had a friend who, 15 years ago, used it with her children - after they were about 8 mths or so - and it was very successful. They signed when they were hungry, when they had had enough, when their nappies were full, how they were feeling etc. I thought it was fantastic - seemed to limit the amount of temper tantrums too.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Up Front: The Holland Diaries, Pt 1,

    Unfortunately, I know exactly what you mean.
    here was a point at which the doctor's voice receded, becoming inaudible under a white sea of shock. He was telling us quite important things, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't hear a word he said.

    Oh yes. The writing things down is important, and I always advise people to take a nonfamily member, or someone suitably objective, as well. so that what the doctor actually says is noted accurately by someone. Cos let's face it, if you can remain congniscent whilst your world crumbles a little, then there's something wrong, somewhere.

    She was naturally so pretty and clever and talented that she's been given an extra load to carry, just to make it fair on everyone else.

    Fantastic. Love that. You know, life is shit sometimes but there are people who seem to live without major trauma. I can't see but that a charmed life must be so limiting. And I have met people who live those sort of lives, and generally, you know, they are very lacking - im empathy, in spirit, in humour. Those who do it hard recognise easy when they see it.

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

  • Island Life: There is no depression in…,

    I was just with my dogpack, and had an argument about why it's okay for women not to like their bodies.

    See, I argue with my dogs about why they shouldn't be barking, coming and going when they don't want to, and about not stealing food.

    Clearly your dogs are a lot smarter than mine.

    Ahem. There is a pack of dogs and a pack of people, who are the owners of the dogs. You see?

    Mt Eden, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 3136 posts Report

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