Business was light on the main Snitch Board today, after the flurry of yesterday’s trades in Solid Energy spy contracts.
Inside cleaning lady contracts for the Immigration Department were up $15 to $145, in solid trading.
Corrections Department whistle blowers fell $6 to $38.25.
Disgruntled ex-police officers also fell sharply in early trading before recovering to $88.00 plus GST, including travel expenses.
There were no trades again today for the Colonel’s secret recipe.
An unnamed party was said to be bidding $843,000 in an off-board offer for “anything interesting” about John Key.
On the Glucina Board, trading was described as detumescent.
Grainy photos of Noelle McCarthy in her smalls were steady at $2400.
Vile stories about Susan Wood dropped $215 to $4000
Interviews with builders about anything to do with poles, bedrooms and Nicky Watson or any old Auckland slapper were down $5 to $32.50 and a six pack of Export Gold.
A spokesman for the Snitch Market said that media revelations about the so-called “Snail Trail Snitch” had done little to cool demand for insider information. “Do you know what it costs to hire a team of lawyers and PR people? These people are a bargain by comparison, and the market’s flooded with them. As fast as one of them goes down, there’s another one looking for a lazy fifty. For as long as a 30G iPod costs four hundred bucks, we can keep wheeling out the bodies.”