Posts by Isabel Hitchings

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  • Up Front: Lighting the Dark,

    What is blowing my mind at the moment, is how many things I have not recognised as problematic because, at the time, I saw them as normal and unremarkable.

    Like, as a teen, engaging in intense, romantic, hand-holding because that was the best way to stop my date touching where I didn't want him to and a verbal "no" would lead to belittling and persuasion.

    Like, having agreed, in principle, that (PIV) sex might be a thing I wanted at some stage meaning that consent was, henceforth, assumed.

    Like knowing that, when the skinhead in the cafe where I was waiting for a bus invited me out back for a fuck, the only safe refusal strategy was to invoke my large, possessive, boyfriend.

    These things, and more, happened at a time when I would have cheerfully told you that, apart from that one intermediate school art teacher who liked to wind me up, I had never encountered sexism. I'm rather more aware these days but still rarely call anyone out as to do so often feels, socially if not physically, unsafe.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Feed: Meals for Me,

    The last time I regularly dined alone it was on a student's budget and I was rather more carnivorous than I am now. I seem to recall a lot of sausages.

    My partner is allergic to eggs so that's what we eat any time he's not around - mostly either fried eggs and chips or a quiche.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Just Like Unicorns,

    Sex drive is a thing. And sex between some people at some times can lead to reproduction. But I think it’s quite a leap to tie all sexual behaviour to a reproductive purpose.

    Oh absolutely, we have sex for pleasure and social bonding purposes far more than for reproduction and we mostly choose our sexual behaviours based on anything but an increased chance of conception but that reproductive urge is in the mix..

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Just Like Unicorns,

    Welllll...but also the sudden horniness just before menstruation, when conception is impossible?

    That I'm not so sure of. Bonus time?

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Up Front: Just Like Unicorns,

    It's not so much that (female) humans are fertile all the time, as that the few days a month we are fertile are hidden such that it's often safest to treat every day as a fertile day. I find it interesting that many women find our libidos match up neatly with our fertility - As if nature was quite invested in getting us knocked up.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Feed: My Life in Curry,

    I've just had the most intense memory/craving for the curry my Dad used to make when I was small and we were hippies. Hard boiled eggs and a mildish tomato and onion curry sauce atop a pile of brown rice.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Feed: My Life in Curry,

    For most of my high school years my best friend was a girl whose family had moved to Nelson from India to help in her uncle's restaurant. I spent many happy evenings hanging out in their kitchen, sampling the food and helping out where I could. On busy nights they would dress me in a sari and send me out to help my friend wait tables. Invariably a customer would say "But you're not Indian." To which I would reply "No, but I'm family.‘

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: What Hekia Parata actually said, in reply to Yamis,

    And when kids do get funding for extra help it only lasts until the end of the school year and then has to be re-applied for in a process that often takes the whole first term.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Capture: One picture of you, and no more, in reply to Lilith __,

    What a gorgeous smile. We can't see your parents but the love is so apparent.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

  • Hard News: What Hekia Parata actually said,

    What makes performance or added value impossible to judge is the amount of stuff that needs to be in place before results can start to show up. Kids can’t learn until they feel safe to take risks and often need to interact with ideas quietly and internally before they can show what they have learned. If a child does well in a test, it is not the result of just six months of teaching but of all the groundwork put in by parents, teachers, teacher aides, coaches, tutors….over the course of years.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 715 posts Report Reply

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