Goodbye to all that

12:26 Dec 21, 2009 27

Some fell, others are hanging on in much changed circumstances. Some are in love and happy for the first time in many years. Yet others await the call.

Last Friday night the taxi driver, from Iraq seven years ago, told me his fiancée was arriving in 10 days. He was happy and I was happy for him.
We agreed that for him next year should be better.

And it is that time of year when the arbitrary turn of a calendar rings out the old and rings in the new. We wish each other a happy new year. I like that.

We enter a new year with optimism, and Lord knows there any number of people and factors beyond out control which could make it miserable.

But we look ahead and hope for the best. We are amusing animals to observe.

I cannot lie. We had a good year, yet are aware that all around us others didn’t. We especially wish them a happier new year. We are grateful for all we have -- and it isn’t the Beatles box set in mono.

We have a small circle of fine friends, a larger circle of helpful and forgiving acquaintances, and families who are loving and supportive. I find it sad that so many can’t say such simple things, can only say them cynically, or will detect cynicism in those who do say them.

At this time of the year I especially miss my three kids who are all in London. My sisters live in Singapore and Melbourne. So there’s just me.

Which is okay, it means I get more ham.*

I hope you had a good year and have an enjoyable Christmas and holiday season. And I also genuinely hope you do have a happy new year.
See you on the other side.

PS. At Music From Elsewhere I have chosen the best 25 albums of 2009 out of the many hundreds I heard and profiled for your pleasure, so feel free to Post a Comment. (People already are and many agree with me, that I have terrible taste).
Oh and the 26th is that Beatles mono set. I’m grateful I have it.

* This quip backfired within a few minutes of writing. We had ordered some kind of PC South Island free-range ham and after many delays it just turned up. I signed for it and paid, not knowing what Megan had ordered. It turns out what now occupies the whole of our modest fridge-freezer is twice the size of what she wanted. It is a whopping 10kg and is as big as my chest.
More for me? And for everyone I know.

Graham Reid is the author of the book 'The Idiot Boy Who Flew'.

(Click here to find out more)

27 responses to this post

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Paul Campbell, 13:23 Dec 21, 2009

2009 was a sucky year I've spent way too much of it on the road. Friends have passed away too young, others have been struck with cancer - we declared it over a month ago, roll on the new year

Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 2623 posts Report
3410, 15:01 Dec 21, 2009

Mmmmm... surplus ham.

Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report
andin, 15:01 Dec 21, 2009

As years go its was a middling year. Enjoyed your writing and am annoyed I cant listen to more music. But from now on I'm more inclined to lump years together into decades and wonder how different 2019 will be.
All the best.

raglan • Since Mar 2007 • 1891 posts Report
Lucy Stewart, 16:35 Dec 21, 2009

Mmmmm... surplus ham.
It's not Christmas unless you're eating ham for the next fortnight because the person responsible for ham purchasing bought an enormous one in a moment of over-enthusiasm. At least, that's how it always worked in my family.

Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report
Dinah Dunavan, 16:41 Dec 21, 2009

Ham freezes well. Mum would slice lots of it and freeze in suitable sized packages for the weeks to follow.

Dunedin • Since Jun 2008 • 186 posts Report
Geoff Lealand, 16:44 Dec 21, 2009

A good year, except for the terrible middle bit, when a close friend died in a snow storm in the Tararuas.
Thank you, Graham, for all your insights into good music this year. I have purchased at least 6 CDs based on your recommendations.

Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2562 posts Report
Kyle Matthews, 16:52 Dec 21, 2009

It's not Christmas unless you're eating ham for the next fortnight because the person responsible for ham purchasing bought an enormous one in a moment of over-enthusiasm. At least, that's how it always worked in my family.
My family is developing a tradition of trying to cook the ham on the BBQ, letting the fat run off to the tray, which then catches fire, cooking the lid of the BBQ, flames six feet high, almost setting the house on fire.
But each to their own I guess.

Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report
Isabel Hitchings, 19:48 Dec 21, 2009

Our year wasn't really that flash and then we lost a family member to suicide in August. I will be very very glad to see the back of 2009.
I am optimistic that 2010 will be, at least, better.

Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report
UncleMike, 21:51 Dec 21, 2009

Also going for the free range hippy ham. And at $130 it better be a big fat squealer! Still at least it got to walk the earth before my family consumes it.

Since Sep 2009 • 8 posts Report
Sofie Bribiesca, 21:53 Dec 21, 2009

and then we lost a family member
Well that was a bummer then. Sorry to hear of your loss. We lost 2 family and it really does zap the bejesus out of one (with hindsight). One thing I do appreciate from the mexican side of my family is the celebration of the lives of those you lose.Then the Irish side have a bit of a singalong as well and the many English in my family have really taught me about grieving and really mourning the loss of loved ones.
We have a small circle of fine friends, a larger circle of helpful and forgiving acquaintances, and families who are loving and supportive. I find it sad that so many can’t say such simple things,,
Too true.
Best of luck with all 10kgs of ham. Thoroughly enjoying "The Idiot Boy Who Flew". Who could've guessed. ;) I am wandering across America in your shoes and they feel like my shoes. It's wonderful .Merry Xmas to you and yours xxx

here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report
Joanna, 01:28 Dec 22, 2009

Let me join the chorus of those saying Two Thousand and Whine can fuck off already with its redundancies, burglaries and hospitalisations, and that's just the start of my list of complaints about it, to say nothing of all the crap that my friends have been through as well...

Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 746 posts Report
giovanni tiso, 08:26 Dec 22, 2009

I'll be happy to see the back of 2009 as well, because of reasons. But I'm glad it didn't uniformly suck for everybody.

Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report
Lucy Stewart, 09:10 Dec 22, 2009

My family is developing a tradition of trying to cook the ham on the BBQ, letting the fat run off to the tray, which then catches fire, cooking the lid of the BBQ, flames six feet high, almost setting the house on fire.
But each to their own I guess.
That sounds like the kind of tradition I could get behind, but I admit there are potential downsides.
I quite liked 2009 - I acquired a husband and a degree, and ditched a much-hated job - but it was very much a year of transition. Glad it happened, happy to move on.

Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report
pollywog, 09:30 Dec 22, 2009

i dont dine on the swine so the x-mass ham thing doesnt do it for me.
they year itself started good, got a bit shit in the middle, picked up towards the end and is still picking up.
musically, i mourned the death of hiphop, the passing of michael jackson and the homogenisation of dubstep.

somewhere else • Since Dec 2009 • 152 posts Report
recordari, 09:47 Dec 22, 2009

Cancer, suicide, breakups and more cancer. It has been a year for grown up stuff, and I'm regressing towards my childhood as it goes on. So yes, 2009, go away and leave me alone.
On the flip side some lives have been saved, and the good thing about really crap years is the next one is usually better, if only by comparison.
Is that Christmas cheery enough? Oh well, Ham, ahhh, time!
I should say that I'm also feeling very fortunate, with all the guilt edged angst that that entails.

AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report
Hilary Stace, 13:31 Dec 22, 2009

I think next year is going to be turbulent - but not necessarily in a bad way. A bit like the late 60s. Turbulent, activism, turbulent protest and probably turbulent weather.

Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 3229 posts Report
Sofie Bribiesca, 11:00 Dec 23, 2009

This will probably mean nothing but now at page116 of Mr Reid's fine book "The Idiot Boy Who Flew", I feel compelled to tell Graham that I and Steve have been to Brunei.We went on the Sultans birthday and it really does make a difference.The whole town has a party for the weekend, concerts through the evening, buildings all draped in colourful lights, with boat and jetskis races.Picnics along the river, The markets across a waterway from our hotel are a weekend delight with water taxis that will take one on rides to view the Palace and the villages in the water. I think it was $2.After 2 hours wandering along the river, we gave the guy $10 and he was truly grateful. Our meal was worthy of a photo. I have never seen such a beautiful giant prawn of which I enjoyed at 10pm upon our arrival. Hospitals are free. A donation of $5 was considered appropriate.The Sunday morning Marketplace lead me up some ancient steps to a grave yard that had some really fascinating/beautiful tombstones and exotic bugs.
So been to Brunei, Bandar Seri Begawan.Didn't go to the movies but. I guess timing is everything. We loved the place, especially after needing a stop on the way home from London. C'est la Vie! :)

here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report
Islander, 11:24 Dec 23, 2009

I'm beginning to distrust this millenium's odd-numbered years...2001, death of a close family member, family friction and a lot of legal angst; 2003, personal probs like arthritis really starting to kick-in, and family illness; 2005, really hideous year for family illnesses, and 2007 ditto, culminating in the death of one of my sisters. 2009 saw only 3 hospitalisations of whanau, but a slew of other problems, which have been wearying and wearing-
the nice thing about the Hogmanay bonfire is you can metaphorically toss in all the old year's pains and disasters and watch them spark up & extinguish. And then, Yay! welcome 2010!

Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report
Caleb D'Anvers, 11:45 Dec 23, 2009

I think next year is going to be turbulent - but not necessarily in a bad way. A bit like the late 60s. Turbulent activism, turbulent protest and probably turbulent weather.
Good call, Hilary. It's also forecast to be the hottest year in recorded human history. I'm thinking a global Do the Right Thing moment, though what the pizzeria will be remains to be seen. The environment? The global economic system? The possibility that complex human societies will be able to remain on the planet long term? I shudder to think.
I also think that there is something really nasty brewing in American politics, and that we will see the first real fruits of it next year. Ugh.

London SE16 • Since Mar 2008 • 482 posts Report
pollywog, 12:08 Dec 23, 2009

hmmmm...maybe there really is something prophetic about 2012.
was at a party the other night and some cute canadian good time traveller was talking about all the places she'd been, the drugs she'd taken blah blah blah and the conversation turned to movies. 2012 came up and she starts talking about the start of the mayan calender as oppposed to the end of the world so i threw in, it's probably when the aliens will reveal themselves and that pretty much killed the conversation...i laughed:)

somewhere else • Since Dec 2009 • 152 posts Report
Graham Reid, 07:40 Dec 24, 2009

You really are reading my book Sofie! Cool.
Yes, I agree it does depend on when you go to a place. For the benefit of the rest of you who don't know what we are talking about, I went to Brunei . . . during Ramadan. Different vibe -- but any place where you can't get a drink and sit and chat with people is kinda tough.
And the movie that Sofie mentions?
I went to a film to fill in time because I was bored witless and was the only person in the 500 seat cinema. Weird.
And keep reading Sofie -- that long title story at the end might throw some perspective on what is happening in Australia right now with Mary MacKillop being hailed as a native saint.
Happier new year everyone.
G

auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 45 posts Report
giovanni tiso, 08:34 Dec 24, 2009

I also think that there is something really nasty brewing in American politics, and that we will see the first real fruits of it next year. Ugh.
I was going to poo-poo your pessimism but then I read that Bondy has retired from test cricket so yeah, I think that's going to open the floodgates in a cosmic sort of way.
What will the pizzeria be indeed.

Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report
Hilary Stace, 09:19 Dec 24, 2009

And goodbye to Kim Peek, the man the movie, Rain Man , was based on. Died in the US aged 58. Rain Man was 'the foundational text in the cinematic representation of autism' says Stuart Murray of Leeds University and probably the person who has had the most to say on the representation of autism in movies and literature.
Kim Peek, thank you for the genre and the knowledge.

Wgtn • Since Jun 2008 • 3229 posts Report
ScottY, 09:45 Dec 24, 2009

For me personally it has been a good year. With two young ones at home there has been much sleep deprivation, and I've felt tired all year. I am looking forward to the "break" (i.e. being run ragged by two under threes for days on end). But it's been a good year because I feel blessed (in a non-religious way ) to have a happy healthy family.
Bond's retirement though has saddened me :(

West • Since Feb 2009 • 794 posts Report
Steve Barnes, 13:51 Dec 24, 2009

I am optimistic that 2010 will be, at least, better.
Hurrumph. Isn't that what John Key promised us for 2009 with his new fangled government? Better? Humbug. 2009 will go down in my history book as one of the worst years in memory.
Apart from PAS of course, which remained a high point throughout.
:-)

Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report