Hard News by Russell Brown

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Hard News: Perverse Entertainment

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  • Heather Gaye,

    Can we go back to talking about ammonites & trilobites? I felt like I was actually learning something.

    ETA: anagram generator! FTW! The internal PA one is called Alien Lizard, right?

    Morningside • Since Nov 2006 • 532 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite,

    Tea. Lie down. OK?

    Try deep breaths, counting to ten and that sort of thing. I hear that when hyperventilating occurs, one should breathe into a bag to prevent over-oxygenation. Obviously the word "victim" gets to you.

    On the off chance that you... no you didn't. Even in quoting you miss the point. It is not about whether you are able to assert yourself with dignity, it's whether you allowed any dignity in your characteristation of others, which you ostentatiously failed to do by being a puerile smartarse from the very first.

    We know who "Little P" was, it's obvious that you chose your moniker because you are the same or wish to emulate them. Your lies are tiresome and you've ceased to be entertaining. You were fun, but nothing lasts forever. Time to pull the plug. Come back when you have a full crop of pubic hair.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Heather Gaye,

    Alien Lizard is a total goodie Heather! Playful, punning, great & poetic insights ( and *not* ‘Lil P’!
    He has come back, irrgegularly posting under his own name, and I appreciate him very much. Is in CHCH. May have access problems-

    BUT – anyone wants to chat about ammonites/nautilids/trilobites et al – I am your – ur, thing?!

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Heather Gaye,

    Yes, of course.

    Well, I’m not sure if ammonites are that interesting – even nautiloids, thought to be the most primitive cephalopods, seem to be more robust.

    This

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-12127790?print=true

    seems to indicate that they weren’t really able to deal with very large prey. Mind you, it could only relate to one species. I think that there is a bit of excessive generalisation going on.

    Trilobites, on the other hand, are really cool. I recommend Trilobite: Eyewitness to Evolution by Richard Fortey as a read. He’s a specialist in trilobites and writes very eloquently. His discussions of the eyes of Phacops are the origin of the pun in his title.

    They were an incredibly diverse, long-lasting and successful group and they all seemed to vanish in a mass extinction. Horseshoe crabs are their closest known living relatives, but considering how little of the deep sea has been explored, I live in hope that some true living trilobites, like the coelacanth, will be found.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • son of little p,

    and you sir Mr Kracklite of course are now "allowing dignity in your characteristion of" myself. Via a string of abusive terms one after the other I'll be damned if you ain't the most fantastically condescending voice i have ever heard

    Since Apr 2011 • 38 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite,

    That’s “Dr” actually.

    I do lots of voices. This is just one of them. You should hear my Cornish accent.

    Now, as for arthropods. Mantis shrimps. Really amazing. Hyperspectral vision, can even see – and communicate – using polarised light.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Ammonites make beyootiful fossils (and trilobites even better ones.) Given what __may__exist still in the oceans of our world (coelacanths are the least of 'em, compared with giant eels) - there is a possibility that an evolved trilobite may still be around - it just wont quite look like it's ancestors-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    O berloody hell Kracklite!
    I love mantis shrimps!
    Almost certainly the fastest mover on the planet, and - the vision!
    When I mentioned this, on my only visit to Japan, my hosts organised 3 of them, beautifully prepared, and very very dead, as a special treat. I loved their hospitality, truly & deeply-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite,

    Yes, there’s this, this and this!

    In a novel that I wrote a while back,* I couldn’t resist adding a character whose office is panelled in slabs of polished stone rather like this (hope the link makes it – I had a bit of difficulty).

    *Fingers crossed. Typesetting and illustration is under way, but the publishing industry is in flux these days, and my publisher himself isn’t in the best of health.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Islander,

    Here's a question, what would be your favourite aquarium pet? Octopus or mantis shrimp? Both clever, both weird (that's a plus for me - I love cats, like Lovecraft, but could they be just a bit more... eldritch?). The latter live longer, however.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Greville Whittle, in reply to Kracklite,

    Mine would be a Cuttlefish. I watched a tank full of them in Singapore, swimming and changing colours, for ages*.

    I also like turtles, have no idea why, not one I can convey articulately anyway.


    *Ages in this case, was when my Wife tugged my sleeve and said "It's been fifteen minutes"

    Hamiltron • Since Oct 2008 • 50 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Kracklite,

    Glory to our world!!!! - opalised!

    The only 'pet' I have is an axolotyl - which is just there, in it's tank, after one of my nephews decided he couldnt look after it-

    I'd prefer an octopus - it's that brain/eye conjunction, with the displayed curiosity-
    but actually setting up a tidal saltwater aquarium...

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Greville Whittle,

    Ah, turtles, well now, one of my favourite writers, Ursula LeGuin, uses them as a motif in one of my favourite novels, The Lathe of Heaven. They have a wonderful absurdity, and yet, ahem, dignity in their slow grace.

    That novel has something to say about the virtue of a particular kind of passivity.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Islander,

    Scanning Peter Watts' blog, I noted a reference he made to the fact that octopuses don't necessarily have full control over their tentacles...

    Ah, here it is! Mantis shrimps as a bonus. Consciousness is distributed it appears.

    (BTW, Watts has a notoriously black sense of humour, and having recently survived an attack of necrotising fasciitis, he has, with considerable glee, posted images of the results. The images are horrifying and Not Safe For Your Last Meal. Typically, he followed it up with a post entitled "Gangrene" which showed an image that seems to be truly horrible indeed. It is in fact, a pastry. You have been warned. He is evil, but he also likes cats.)

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Kracklite,

    Waua! Will go look. Apopo- (have lots of medics in family so am - um, accustomned - to *really horrible photos*-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Islander,

    Of pastries?

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Kracklite,

    Worse! Curries!
    Bugger- that doesnt seem to have loaded-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Islander,

    OK, here were my google search terms:

    watts “your brain is leaking"

    His old blog has been stopped, though it’s still going in its new form as

    No Moods, Ads or Cutesy Fucking Icons (Re-reloaded)

    And the worst is No! Don’t, I really mean it!

    He does have an interesting and practical way for tracking his cats about the apartment, I must say.

    This is also, I suppose, perverse entertainment, but with the far more self-aware intention of the object.

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Kracklite, in reply to Islander,

    compared with giant eels

    Bloop?

    The Library of Babel • Since Nov 2007 • 982 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Play Misty for Me - or pushing solvent abuse?

    a community of blogs = a numb osmotic fog

    sadly an anagram fail: the "ly" is missing...
    a numbly osmotic fog would nail it!

    according to my stubby pencil and old envelope back
    a more damning rearrangement of a community of blogs
    might be a snide dig at the glib cant of you moms
    that's telling ya!
    :- )

    ...it's a nice concept though - in some ways the
    whole internet is a numbly osmotic fog
    - Osmosis - the process of gradual or unconscious
    assimilation of ideas, knowledge, etc.

    We just have to watch out for those who only absorb the rich
    free-methane-laden ideas of Kiwiblog and similar oxygen-starved
    cesspools - and any incoming intergalactic Black Clouds ...

    yrs
    Trilobiter
    The Ammonite Rider

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7889 posts Report Reply

  • Leopold, in reply to Greville Whittle,

    Yep - thought cuttlefish were great - its the way they wave back at you when you wave at them. Interspecies communication of a very basic sort

    Since Jan 2007 • 152 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Kracklite,

    Very possiblely…

    There is a wonderful passage in the non-fiction book “Leviathan” by Philip Hoare:

    “-the barque Pauline was sailing in moderate winds and fine weather when her crew saw some black spots on the water, with a whitish pillar high above them. As the ship drew near, it became apparent that the pillar was more than 30 feet tall, and was rising and falling with a splash. George Drevar, ship’s master, picked up his eye-glass and could not believe what he saw: a sea-serpent with its coils wrapped twice around a sperm whale.
    -
    “Using its head and tails as levers, the serpent was twisting itself around the whale ‘with great velocity’. Every few minutes the pair sank beneath the waves, only to reappear, still engaged in mortal combat.”
    _
    “From its coils, Drevar estimated the serpent to be in excess of 160 feet long. He noted that its mouth was ever open.” p.224

    The sea serpent won.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Carol Stewart, in reply to Kracklite,

    Ah, turtles, well now, one of my favourite writers, Ursula LeGuin, uses them as a motif in one of my favourite novels, The Lathe of Heaven. They have a wonderful absurdity, and yet, ahem, dignity in their slow grace

    Ditto with one of my favourite writers, Russell Hoban, and his lovely book Turtle Diary.

    Wellington • Since Jul 2008 • 822 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Carol Stewart,

    Goodness! Havent even thought of The Lathe of Heaven or Turtle Diary
    for years...must go reread both, because I love 'em too.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • recordari, in reply to Carol Stewart,

    Russell Hoban, and his lovely book Turtle Diary.

    +1

    The Lathe of Heaven.

    +2

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

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