Posts by Jackie Clark
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I wonder if Mr 6 likes to swim
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I know. It's funny because in some places, names are purely matriachal. Alot of our kids have their mother's surname, and some have both (Maori families are particularly fond of names that incorporate both, in our kindergarten anyway). When I taught in Owairaka, most of our children carried their mothers' surnames - whether they were Indian/Somalian/Ethiopian/Sudanese.
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The older I get though, the more I think I want to hang on to Wegan.
I also meant to say that some people have awesome, distinctive, surnames in the first place. And that has been the reason from some women of my acquaintance either keeping or discarding their own surnames.
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It might be wrong, and I know I've discussed this before over on Twitter, but all I want in life is to become a Dame.
We are dames, darling, just not Dames. It's good enough for me.
my awesome, thematically consistent French-assed name *remains* awesome, thematically consistent, and French-assed.
From a feminist perspective, I have been, in the past, very conflicted about this. When I got married, I changed my name - yes, at the bank, all that bollocks - to his. I was a silly little girl, really, because I was full of " I am his" lovedupedness, and Ian couldn't have cared less if I changed my name. I did, though, and so, for years, I was Mrs (his last name). Even though none of my friends or family ever remembered his last name. I was always Jackie Clark to them. I used to get quite annoyed about it. And then, as we went on, I became Jackie Clark again, although by now all our bank accounts, power etc were addressed to Mrs or Jackie (his last name). So I became both. Mrs G, or Ms C and even Ms G, on occasions. And I am fine with that now. Because Mrs or Jackie or Ms G is a part of me now, as much as Jackie Clark is or ever was. And, after all, all surnames in most of the Western World, are patriachal. So conflicted I am, no more. I, like everyone, am different things to different people. And that goes for my name.
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So one of our Christmas traditions revolves around us getting cards addressed to 'Mr and Mrs'. I laugh while she fumes. Then she kicks me in the nuts so she can have a laugh.
Do you get the Mr and Mrs His Full Name ones? We did, last Christmas. I went rather beyond fuming.
Ah, it's all about the etiquette. Interestingly, when a man is knighted, and he is still alive, the nomenclature when the spouse is there, is Sir (his first name)__ and Lady (insert surname here, but not her name)_. When he dies, then she becomes Lady (her first name, followed by her married surname)___. However, when a woman is a Dame - as appointed by the GG on behalf of HM the Queen - she is Dame whoever, and her husband? Well, you can see my point. He retains his identity.
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And one for Mr 6 (who wears a size 8). He gave me props for standing up to a bully.
And that, my friend, is why you rule. Because the kid sees his dad as someone to emulate. And that's a great thing.
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(Also, is there a point at which I stop loving Tim Gunn more and more every time I see him?)
Never, because he is awesome and also very beautifully turned out. All the time. And he is kind, and caring. And also, I believe, quite near to my concept of a god. (And don't think I don't see you doing what we talked about the other day. You are also very special. Did I mention that?)
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Me too. I have been at work, watching those "It Get's Better" videos all morning. I am not so much crying as leaking.
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I am ashamed to say that I hadn't thought of the fact that it's the school holidays, and of course, children were more than likely watching the aforementioned discussion. I would love to host Paul Henry in this kindergarten speaking to 90 Pasifika/Maori/Urdu 3-5 year olds who, as it happens, display many great leadership qualities. Not least of which is that they know BS when they hear it. And also they are alarmingly honest because that is the way their families, and we, have encouraged them to be. They own up to their mistakes - when I look them in the eyes and tell them not to lie to me, and then I thank them for their honesty - and I would suggest that Mr Henry could learn a few lessons from them. Who do we see about actioning your excellent plan, Jolisa?
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Except there was the one night I let slip to a classmate, as we were having dinner in one of the handful of restaurants in our tiny college town. He pushed his chair back from the table and bellowed "You're MARRIED?!"
Oh, I do relate to that. There are a few peripheral friends I have who were somewhat, perhaps less violently than in your case, Jolisa, surprised that I, a feminist scion in my social circles, would be married. And then, having got over their surprise, and after having found out how long I have been married for, wanted to know how to make a successful marriage.