Hard News: For Young and Old ...
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I don't know that I'm in favour of jolly funerals. They seem very self-indulgent of the mourners and more than a little unfair to the departed, who probably enjoyed a good knees-up as well.
Wouldn't it be great if we could affirm people's contribution to our lives, remember funny things about them, deck them with flowers, and console ourselves for the sudden thought that we'll be off too, one day - all while the recipient was able to join in (and had right of rebuttal to those "humorous" anecdotes)?
I'm all for having a party to celebrate someone's life. But can I have mine now please, while I'm still here to enjoy all the (presumably) nice things you'll say about me.
Flowers for the living.
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Regarding the "new" funerals and attitudes to death, yes, there is something to be said for them, but I have been to some where I really felt there was no space left to mourn, which is what I wanted to do.
I can remember a few years ago driving with friends to a funeral in Hamilton, and we were all in black. We stopped somewhere for a coffee and someone asked why we were dressed that way. When we explained he said "Come on! I thought we were supposed to celebrate people's lives now, not be sad!"
Some deaths actually deserve mourning, they deserve grief. I think this "Let's all party" attitude can be another way of denying the reality of our emotions.
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Put our 48hours film on the list of tributes to Finn.
He was in our team last year and we wanted to do something for him. Finn's partner, Sophie, and Finn's dad, Sean, sent us down a heap of his old recordings and we used them in our film.
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Watched your show on TV last night for the first time. Finally gotten the Freeview decoder, just when I had gotten use to everyone being short and wide on my TV. Well except for Harrison Ford's missus. Didn't help her at all.
Even sat through one of those god awful CSI programs because it was in HD. So pretty.I'm not a reader of Girlfriend. Way too old and the wrong gender. But the quotes you presented don't surprise me. Though the more graphic ones were actually questions from readers, not what the magazine was promoting. The only advice quoted from the magazine was how to french kiss. Hardly that shocking for teens.
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The only advice quoted from the magazine was how to french kiss. Hardly that shocking for teens.
There was also the advice on deceiving your parents and putting yourself in a risky position with some guy you hardly (go off the the beach where there's no one around!), and just a general lack of good sense, I thought.
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We also had a look at New Zealand's biggest (181,000 readers) magazine for teenage girls, Girlfriend -- and were a bit shocked at what was in a issue whose reader of the month is 13 years old, and which was announced in the editor's blog with a cheery "Hi girls, how were the school holidays?"
I wonder if there's any causual relationship between your shock and being the father of a teenage son. :) I'm probably going to get written off as a right-wing nut for saying this, but what happened to the notion that just because you can, doesn't mean you should?
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Wait a mo', Russell, that sounded utterly appalling. I'm confident that you and Fiona have a damn sight better judgement than the editor of Girlfriend. Giving advice on deceiving parents and how to be a rapist's wet dream? Cheese and crackers...
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Finn's partner, Sophie, and Finn's dad, Sean, sent us down a heap of his old recordings and we used them in our film.
That's a really lovely thought. I can't wait to see it.
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I find the 'sexing up of our children' (phrase taken from an article by Miranda Devine see http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2008/05/21/1211182891875.html) to be abhorent. I honestly think that we need to be far more pro-active in condemning the ideas in our society that allow this attitude to exist. I worry about my girls, but I worry more about their kids. Where's the politicians on these issues? Put 'standard of living' concerns aside for once and start talking about what we want for our kids.
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The quote on the show was 'favourite beach or park' and nothing about deceiving parents. Though there may have been in the article.
(You read it, so we didn't have too).
I was just thinking something like Graig was (A first, I'm sure). That it may be that I'm not a parent, so I don't naturally assume the worst.
I had to rewatch the programme. There was a glitch during the second ad break and so I missed the half of the discussion about the pornstar clothes for tots.Loved comment about using younger models. "..because when they are 18, their ass gets fat". lol
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Where's the politicians on these issues?
As far away as possible I hope, Andrew. One of the greatest Simpson characters is Helen Lovejoy, whose mantra ("Will someone please think of the children?!") is inevitably the prelude to an act of utter imbecility.
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Oops, that should be Craig, not Graig.
Sorry mate. -
I'm 22 and started reading Girlfriend and Dolly when I was about 11. They were first given to my by my mum who had bought them for research as she was a community health educator. I'd have to say that they provided my friends and I with a whole lot of really solid information about sexual health - mostly in dismissing common myths about virginity and stds.
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Oops, that should be Craig, not Graig.
Sorry mate.No harm, no foul. Me spulling and poof-riding rilly sux so cant complan. :)
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Stella editor Emily Wilson, who kindly stepped in at the last moment, after Pam Corkery's bum exploded.
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Other subjects include Tiki Taane, Jan-Marie, Kevin Milne, Pam Corkery and Mike Hosking.
I'm hoping that these two things occurred apart in time. Pam Corkery's bum exploding is bad enough in text.
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On another note (while I do enjoy reading people's commentary on funerals and tweeny mags)... I am so stoked at how well Marty Welch is doing!
Not to name drop (which of course leads to doing it anyway) ... Once upon a time I used to work with Marty in an Irish pub on Ponsonby Road (an Irish pub which is now a foodhall). It was ten or so years ago, but I clearly remember him being just a lovely and very interesting bloke - and certainly really handy to have behind the sports bar on a quiet night when there was no other security.
His work looks great, and I couldn't be happier for him.
(BTW Please excuse the overuse of parentheses. I talk in a series of asides too.)
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Pam Corkery's bum exploding is bad enough in text.
I'd still like to know more about this though. What the hell is going on in our society when exploding bums warrant only a passing mention in a blog post?
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Re: Pam Corkery's bum exploding...please no, we don't need any more details (even though we're all kinda wondering what you meant by that RB...)...won't somebody think of the Hard News readers?!
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I was going to say the same thing Rogan.
I had to read twice to make sure that I had read it correctly. Then thought it was probably something I didn't want to know more about. -
And last month the LA Times ran a feature on ta moko.
And last month I saw a banner ad on a foreign site promo'ing the latest episode of The Hills (a teen 'reality' show). The girls were all off to a tattoo parlour and (as best I could judge from a 15 sec promo) the man with the needle was Maori.
it may be that I'm not a parent, so I don't naturally assume the worst.
Yeah, well that will all change when you do mate! And fast. I used to do a club night called Cheap Sex in the 90s. Then I had a daughter ... now I'm a born again Puritan.
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Then thought it was probably something I didn't want to know more about.
And yet...
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Woman's Day editor Sarah Henry disagreed and thought it was the same as the Dolly magazines she read as a lass.
Why am I not surprised that one magazine editor won't criticise another? Her argument is just as sound as insisting that today's marijuana is no stronger than what we smoked in the 70s. Speaking of which, we may all have sneaked a salacious peek at Mum's Cosmo back then, but back then those mags were produced for women, not teens and tweens.
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As teenage lads we used to love reading the problem page in Jackie and the like. They had one feature where they would print answers without questions, e.g:
LL:
No, you can't get pregnant that way. You shouldn't do it, because you could catch a very nasty nasal infection.MC:
Do *not* let your boyfriend do this to you. It might be true that anything is normal in the context of a loving relationship. But that isn't! -
Then I had a daughter ... now I'm a born again Puritan.
This issue's one of those times when I feel like I might have dropped in from another planet. People keep telling me this will happen, but my daughter is eleven, I wasn't shocked by the Girlfriend content, and I can still remember what it was like to be a teenage girl. I believe the biggest thing 'sexualising' me was all the rampant sex hormones running round my body.
I did manage to work out how to snog boys in parks all by myself, though.
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There's two kinds of messages magazines put out - here's what you should look like, and here's how to do various things you might be considering. I don't have a problem with the second. We can read about road rules, after all, before we sit our learner licences.
I thought Sarah Henry was eminently sensible. It's been a while since I dived into teenage magazines (I moved on to Cosmo at 17 or so before I took the sunscreen song's advice and realised that beauty magazines only make you feel ugly), but nothing I heard quoted on Media 7 seemed any different to what I'd read back in the late 80s/early 90s. It's no new thing for girls to freak out and write to advice columns about whether their experiences are normal - I remember one poor girl whose boyfriend's explorations led her to worry she had cancer - the advice person calmly explained what part of her anatomy he'd found, and suggested that perhaps they needed a bit more maturity before they go there.
Whether or not kids need to know certain bits of information at certain times of their lives, I think there's more harm in providing it too late than providing it too early. Magazines are only a slice of teenagers' socialisation. It's the ones that boys get into that worry me - that heavy dose of wishful thinking in advance of experience seems to me more damaging than straightforward how-to guides and advice. At least the latter canvasses the risks you're taking.
And wow, it's amazing how a few years in the fashion industry can apparently obliterate the philosophies one learns in women's studies.
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