Random Play by Graham Reid

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Random Play: All Apologies

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  • andrew llewellyn,

    Awesome!

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • andrew llewellyn,

    Sorry.

    Since Nov 2006 • 2075 posts Report Reply

  • dc_red,

    Gordon Brown's remorse in relation to the death of a British soldier - and some fuckups in a subsequent letter seemed genuine - and he said sorry about 13 times in a personal phone-call following up on the whole saga.

    As for Mssrs Hide and Harawira - the former is sorry because he got caught (and had his apology 'perfectly' scripted), the latter isn't sorry but knows he needs to offer at least a Clayton's apology.

    Oil Patch, Alberta • Since Nov 2006 • 706 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    it is of modest ambition and good humour in places, and I (of course) think would make an excellent Christmas present,

    Could you bring me a signed copy to the book launch on Dec 2.You are going aren't you? I know I promised to get to your book launch but I left the country. Sorry. Sincerely. I will bring cash. Promise. :)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I make no apologies for it. But if anyone does take offence then . .

    Whilst I don't feel I need to apologise, I thought I would apologise for any offence taken by this
    lil' controversial building

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Holy shit, that video has go-go dancers. That dance is less comprehensible than crumping.

    WLG • Since Nov 2006 • 2264 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen,

    I kind of disagree that the word sorry is over used.

    All too often people seem to go to extraordinary lengths to avoid having to use the word when they've fucked up. Even to the extent of avoid repairing the harm because that would be like admitting there was a problem.

    In my own life I find that when I make a mess of things that saying sorry early seems to allow me the opportunity to try and fix things.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 4451 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    The word sorry also doesn't mean anything if you don't change your ways, and continue on with the same behaviour. People I know are beginning to wonder, or have for some time, what Kevin Rudd's apology to the Stolen Generations (but not to Aboriginal Australia) actually meant.

    Hone was on the lawn outside the Australian Parliament that day, talking to people and the New Zealand media, and I felt quite proud of him for representing Aotearoa. I still like what he stands for, but I wonder whether his ego is getting the better of him. That would be a pity, because he has always been a very sincere MP, in my experience.

    WLG • Since Nov 2006 • 2264 posts Report Reply

  • simon g,

    Thanks, that really is a superb post from Graeme Reed.*

    Don't forget "hindsight". As in, "with the benefit of hindsight, I accept that constantly trying to grope the office staff and threatening to sack anyone who complained was inappropriate". Because I couldn't possibly have known that in advance.

    Extra points for "20/20 hindsight".


    *sorry

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1324 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    But it is still a great song by the Easybeats.

    Oh boy, is it what! I clearly need to investigate them further, rather than just bopping about to 'Friday on My Mind'...

    Holy shit, that video has go-go dancers. That dance is less comprehensible than crumping.

    The male go-go dancer is my absolute favourite. He's really putting some stank on it, isn't he?

    I think go-go dancing is perfectly comprehensible*: it is saying 'here, look at my bullet-bra boobs'. (That's why the guy is trying extra hard: he doesn't have the bullet-bra boobs to fall back on.)

    *I also enjoy watching crumping, FWIW.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    I still like what he stands for, but I wonder whether his ego is getting the better of him. That would be a pity, because he has always been a very sincere MP, in my experience.

    I think he's been too cute by half this week. He spent most of the day, and performed his apology, with two broadcasters who weren't going to challenge him. I really couldn't believe it when I heard Willie and JT agreeing that he'd delivered "an unqualified apology", when he'd qualified it every whichway.

    Sean Plunket was very good this morning in treating the bad language as a diversion, and putting it to both Derek Fox and Ranginui Walker that he'd justified his personal behaviour in going AWOL (including lying to his party leader and the Speaker) on the basis of colonial wrongdoing, and asking whether that was valid. They both squirmed.

    Like you, I have hitherto had a lot of time for him.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22756 posts Report Reply

  • James Littlewood*,

    Jacque Derrida reminds us that an apology is only meaningful if offered for an act that is unforgivable. His example is the S.A. reconciliation thing, but of course, there are more personal possibilities ...

    I often wonder if apologies get a bad rap in western culture. We tend to suck at them (now, why might that be?).

    Some Asian cultures are just brilliant at it, and offer them in job-lots by the thousand.

    Auckland • Since Mar 2008 • 410 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    I think go-go dancing is perfectly comprehensible*: it is saying 'here, look at my bullet-bra boobs'.

    I was distracted by their arms. Sorry.

    WLG • Since Nov 2006 • 2264 posts Report Reply

  • Leigh Kennaway,

    Apologies? They're becoming iconic kiwi behaviour it seems.

    sunny Pt Chevalier • Since Mar 2008 • 40 posts Report Reply

  • Rachael J,

    Best apology I've ever received: "You're right, I was wrong. I'm sorry." Simple, to the point, and takes the wind out of the sails of anyone gearing up for an argument.

    Auckland • Since Apr 2007 • 7 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    Like you, I have hitherto had a lot of time for him.

    I didn't particularly mind when he went off in Australia rather than do the select committee thing. It was rude to his fellow committee members, but at least he did something with the time that I thought came within his job.

    Skipping off work to go sightseeing, not so much.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Semmens,

    "You're right, I was wrong. I'm sorry."

    If that came from a guy, it might not have been quite the apology it sounds like.

    Sevilla, Espana • Since Nov 2006 • 2213 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Best apology I've ever received: "You're right, I was wrong. I'm sorry." Simple, to the point, and takes the wind out of the sails of anyone gearing up for an argument.

    Yeah, pretty much. Mine, from an ex-boyfriend: "I'm sorry for, y'know, everything."

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Lyndon Hood,

    he'd justified his personal behaviour in going AWOL (including lying to his party leader and the Speaker) on the basis of colonial wrongdoing

    That's pretty much my whole beef with the post-Paris side of the business.

    [Though re: the being-sick thing he said that was a misunderstanding. I don't know if that's true; but it's not covered by the 'justification' or the 'apology']

    He sounded pretty sorry for what he apologised for. But it's fair to say he didn't wallow in humility.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1115 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    What I really loved about Hone's exercise in using the Passive-Aggressive Voice was when he said "motherfucker" is demeaning to women -- no it's not, it's demeaning when thrown at anyone, given that we live in a culture where parent-child incest is not only taboo but criminal -- but apparently doesn't apologise at all for trivialising rape for rhetorical effect.

    I'll call bullshit on that -- just as many PASers did when Chris Trotter described criticism of Winston Peters as a "the media equivalent of gang rape" -- and assert that the only thing that's LIKE rape IS rape.

    He sounded pretty sorry for what he apologised for. But it's fair to say he didn't wallow in humility.

    Feh... More like Scarlett O'Hara from Gone With The Wind, who, in Rhett Butler's assessment, is "like the thief who isn't the least bit sorry he stole but is terribly terribly sorry he's going to jail."

    I'm reliably informed that many of his constituents are a damn sight less impressed with Hone's bullshit than the likes of Walker, Fox and Dover Samuels would have the MSM believe. Dare I say it, Tariana Turia was right at the start: This kind of crap is damaging to the Maori Party's credibility, and you can bet you arse that Labour will be down at the flaxroots milking this for all it's worth. And who could blame them?

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Richard Aston,

    Great post Graham - your right - so many light weight apologies so few meaningful sorrys. Its a bloody hard thing to do and its a vulnerable place to go . Maybe it does take time along with courage and humility to really say sorry and mean it. Maybe we need a new word that says "I'm on my way to finding sorry , not there yet need some time" .

    Its like forgiveness - another bloody hard thing to do. It never gells with me when a parent of some child killed in a crash say at the funeral they forgive the driver. I think WTF its only been 3 days and you have found forgiveness - yeah right.

    I guess the length of time it takes to say sorry could be related to the depth of hurt you are apologizing for. In Hone's case I reckon 2 hours is about right - for a child murderer maybe a life time.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 509 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle,

    If that came from a guy, it might not have been quite the apology it sounds like.

    So I can only roll *two* eyes at this? Why don't humans grow more eyes, dammit?

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3828 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Semmens,

    I find the the release of the recording of Gordon Brown's phone conversation an appalling breach of trust.

    Unfortunately, the message politicians of all stripes will take from it will be that they simply shouldn't bother trying to have unscripted encounters with the public.

    Sevilla, Espana • Since Nov 2006 • 2213 posts Report Reply

  • Tom Semmens,

    Oh as for Hone Hawawira - I think Key might be right, the public has made it's judgement on the man. He is politically dead, no one will take him seriously again.

    From now on he will be treated the way you treat a taxi driver offering an unsolicited opinion. With a faint sense of embarassment and a glance at your watch.

    Sevilla, Espana • Since Nov 2006 • 2213 posts Report Reply

  • andin,

    An apology by a politician who appears contrite probably doesn't mean much. These people are politicians, they are trained to fake sincerity.

    Is that cynicism creep or a fatal indictment of our society?

    Does that training stick or does it come unstuck when they leave office.

    raglan • Since Mar 2007 • 1882 posts Report Reply

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