Southerly by David Haywood

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Southerly: This Week in Parliament

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  • Jake Pollock,

    There was a lengthy discussion about SETI on Radio 4 this morning. They didn't mention Lockwood Smith, or camels.

    Raumati South • Since Nov 2006 • 489 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Campbell,

    I think that just points out how effective Dr Smith is working behind the scenes ("danger! danger! Will Robinson") - I for one welcome our new alien overlords as they take over Auckland's local bodies ....

    Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 2615 posts Report Reply

  • Geoff Lealand,

    The connection between camels and Steven Joyce is something to do with date palms?

    Screen & Media Studies, U… • Since Oct 2007 • 2550 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    One of the policies proposed in Mark Thomas' People's Manifesto collection is that goats are to be released into the debating chamber, but the members are forbidden to refer to them.

    But perhaps the parliamentary camel just stuck his nose in. As you know, once you let the camel's nose in...

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Ian MacKay,

    Recently while riding a camel in Abu Dhabi, I casually dropped Rodney Hide's name in the ear of my camel, and she bleated, dribbled then bit my dangling leg. Hard! "Oi!" I murmered. "David Hayward said that Hide was the wisest leader in the World and..." Then she bit me harder! A communication problem David?

    Bleheim • Since Nov 2006 • 498 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder,

    Taking advantage of the time before Emma gets broadband hooked up in her new house to write stories with headlines like "One hump or two", I see. Probably wise.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 708 posts Report Reply

  • Ian MacKay,

    Hello? My page shows the full name and location of posters??? Is it supposed to do that?

    Bleheim • Since Nov 2006 • 498 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    "One hump or two"

    in the wise words of the Tuareg tribesmen
    (aka the Blue men)
    "Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel"
    not to be confused with the Australians':
    (aka Bluey)
    "Tie me kangaroo down sport..."
    or
    "If it humps ride it, if it doesn't hump it..."

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7902 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Hello? My page shows the full name and location of posters??? Is it supposed to do that?

    Don't worry I believe Bleheim is off planet...
    ;- )

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7902 posts Report Reply

  • Ian MacKay,

    Yes Ian. We have been sending strange messages by bouncing them off Pluto and aiming them to excite Lockwood. ‘:twisted:’

    Bleheim • Since Nov 2006 • 498 posts Report Reply

  • Paul Litterick,

    Hello? My page shows the full name and location of posters??? Is it supposed to do that?

    You must have subscribed for the Public Address Premium Stalker plan.

    Are you going to share?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 1000 posts Report Reply

  • Pete,

    interesting post - are you off your meds?

    Since Apr 2008 • 106 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    Here, we share meds at every opportunity- anyone got some Bowmore (pref.15yrold)? I'm out-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Evan Yates,

    I bet he'd be a lot faster than Olympic gold meal swimmer Danyon Loader

    I've never consumed a gold meal, let alone swam in one. I do remember from primary school "religious instruction", that Moses (or some similar biblical figure) reputedly melted down a golden calf idol and made the Israelites drink it. Doesn't sound very tasty.

    The best thing about our religious instruction sessions in early 1970s rural NZ, was that Mr. Levac (don't remember the denomination - but probably not Catholic ) was an excellent cartoonist and his chalkboard illustrations of biblical scenes made me want to be one. (cartoonist that is... not a religious instructor)

    Mind you I'm just as unlikely to ever have a gold medal either...

    Hamiltron, Te Ika-a-Māui • Since Nov 2006 • 197 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    sharing medics is not advised - call me monogamous

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19699 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    gold meal

    pure corn, from the wit fields...?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7902 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    I've never consumed a gold meal, let alone swam in one.

    However did you know that if you filled an olympic pool with custard you could comfortably walk on it? True story.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder,

    However did you know that if you filled an olympic pool with custard you could comfortably walk on it? True story.

    Pics or it didn't happen.

    Actually, do you happen to know at roughly what size of receptacle you can get custard to take a point weight of 100kg? There's probably some relation between depth and width of the custard field that defines how much weight it can support. And I'm sure there's an contributing factor from how thick the custard is.

    I'm just wondering. Obviously, filling an olympic swimming pool full of custard is going to be prohibitively expensive, but if (for example) you can get the same effect in a domestic bathtub, I think you could probably bring that in for under $500 - making it well within the realms of the home hobbyist.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 708 posts Report Reply

  • Kyle Matthews,

    However did you know that if you filled an olympic pool with custard you could comfortably walk on it? True story.

    You crazy Italians!

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    Non-Newtonian fluid, right?

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Pics or it didn't happen.

    Non-Newtonian fluid, right?

    Precisely.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Pics or it didn't happen.

    The pool is a little on the small side, but still.

    (We did once sit in the Botanic Gardens trying to work out how much it would cost to turn Christ's College's swimming pool into a giant jelly.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    Emma, we really should form a QI-watchers posse.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Emma, we really should form a QI-watchers posse.

    Again, I believe we need to conduct some kind of finger-based ritual to avert disaster now.

    Like Toy Stories, if you have kids they should be watching Brainiac.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Mounting Olym-pus...

    However did you know that if you filled an olympic pool with custard you could comfortably walk on it? True story.

    Are you sure you are not thinking of Benny Hill's
    The Underworld Water of Jacques Custard?
    :- )

    Pie = arts queered...
    and let's not forget Adrian Mitchell's John Custard from his fun dystopian novel The Bodyguard (1970)
    (no relation to the Costner/Houston movie)

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7902 posts Report Reply

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