Up Front: Does My Mortgage Look Like a Slag in This?
650 Responses
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This thread has been a pretty good reminder of why I'm pretty much a homebody, though not sure that was the intended effect. Ta for the positive reinforcement of my lifestyle choices, folks! :)
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to try to enjoy your own sexual energy/power (because you can and you should and there is no reason to hide your light under a bushel)
Kowhai? Yay!
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My wife is working in the UAE and she must cover neck, arms, and dress to the ground. Those are the rules at work. They are told to be careful in the street in Abu Dahai or Al Ain when wearing more exposed skin, as this would be a signal apparently that they are loose women.
Dude, last time I checked, sharia law hadn't made it to New Zealand yet. "Wear certain clothing because the law of the land is sexist" is not the same thing as "wear certain clothing because certain people are being sexist assholes", though I think that's the analogue you're going for.
And, hey? That still wouldn't make the people who harassed your wife for being a "loose woman" any less morally culpable for doing so.
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Ah, I suck at this Internet thing. Is this thing even on? Where do you speak into? Hello?
Is there anybody out there? I'm comfortably numb :)
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Ah, I suck at this Internet thing. Is this thing even on? Where do you speak into? Hello?
That's because your tubes are blocked. It happens to me all the time. See that blue cord that leads into the back of your computer? You need to unplug it and let it drain for a few hours.
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Lucy. That was a simple piece of information in answer to the question about overseas. Baffled again how you put "I think that's the analogue you're going for. " into it.
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Ah, I suck at this Internet thing. Is this thing even on? Where do you speak into? Hello?
I think that's the analogue you're going for
Gio, just upgrade to Web 2.0
I've heard it runs on digitals.
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A wee ways upthread it looked like flirting and harassment were being discussed as different points on the same continuum of sexual behaviour but I really don't think they are because I think they often have very different intents.
To me flirting has the main aim (whether it ends in bed or not) of making recipient feel good about themselves (and therefore about the person flirting with them) whereas harassment is about one person demonstrating power over the other.
Flirting can be a beautiful thing and a fine art and there should probably be more of it
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Right, folks. It is my weekend, and in about an hour, I am about to sit down to lunch at the Restaurant of the Year.
And here I thought my man had taken me to the restaurant of the year ! I guess I'll have to explain to him that Merediths is no longer. Happy to say though we weren't interupted by strangers sayin' "you wanna fuk?"
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I'll be back on Monday, or earlier, depending on how slow the internet is in rural Canterbury this weekend.
You're travelling by internet? giga megabits of cool.
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a woman's virtue being like a castle
Rapunzel, let down your hair...
Ah.. erm... well it is Friday.
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Lucy. That was a simple piece of information in answer to the question about overseas. Baffled again how you put "I think that's the analogue you're going for. " into it.
Context, dude. Context. If you weren't trying to make a point about wearing "appropriate" clothing in certain places, what were you saying?
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Ian, sorry I was talking about the way your post was structured just like Holmes' rambles on his tv show, not your content. I was confident others had more than enough feedback to offer about that.
I think it's safe to say what used to be regarded as instinctive or universally obvious is subject to social change. Not so long since women were not up to voting, poor dears, and owning slaves was a damn fine idea.
And now we're seeing the pendulum swing against feminist understandings that were ascendant a few decades ago. That's fine to discuss.
However, some of the common arguments do not stand up to the slightest scrutiny and are as old as the hills - so you can imagine people who have heard them many toes before groaning and eventually being quite curt when they get trotted out again. I hope you understand.
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Toes, times - must have been all the talk about footwear.
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Thinking on your feet I see.
(Happy birthday, btw.)
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Heh. Thanks.
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I get it Sacha. Ta.
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I like a woman that's quiet
A woman that (sic) carriers herslef like Miss Universe
Take my hand
Come with me baby to Loverland
Let me show how sweet it can be
Sharing loving with meSeemed right to drag that up.
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Attitudes to women in other countries: I spent a fair amount of time in various parts of China (mainly Beijing and the surrounds) in the mid 90s, in my university holidays. Since it was cold, everyone wore great big coats to prevent bits dropping off. This meant that any secondary sexual characteristics below the neck were effectively off display.
So on several occasions (at least three), I heard a discussion nearby about whether I was male or female. On the argument for female: long hair and earrings. On the argument for male: beard. Twice, it reached the point where someone just came up and asked me. I found this hilarious (obviously - I'm still telling this story a decade and a half later), and there was no malice - I just came outside the standard gender categories that people were used to. Everyone was very nice about it; more curious than anything else.
Disclaimer: I was not sexually harassed at any point. Unless you count overly aggressive prostitutes touting for business in the nightclubs.
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Seemed right to drag that up.
Right you are.
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A nice read on 1940 style flirtation, from period Esquire.
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Cheers Joe,
As a 13 year old I loved that song, and knew it was well, not right.
For 30 years I'd forgotten about it, and then downloaded it recently.
It's way out there, and don't they dress like their lyrics?
But shit those boys could sing.
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I came home last night after being trapped at a dinner party by a pro-lifer/anti abortion woman. I never thought I would be so badly affected by the sanctimonious and unforgiving rant of a privileged woman who has been with the same man since 19 and never worked. It shook me - I need to toughen up as this is the US.
Came home and read the rest of this thread, as I needed contact with sanity. Thanks all :)
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I came home last night after being trapped at a dinner party by a pro-lifer/anti abortion woman.
Pity you're not still in New Zealand, I believe you could have at least claimed some ACC for that.
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I need to toughen up as this is the US.
I feel for you, as Prince (and later Chaka Khan) sang. I generally just try to avoid those topics of conversation to keep the peace (but that's because I'm usually related by birth or marriage to the wackaloon and need to maintain familial relations!). Sometimes, of course, you can't avoid it because the person is determined to Tell You Things, and then you're stuck doing that weird 'trying to keep stuff lighthearted and changing the subject but still vehemently disagreeing' dance. It's very tiring and can be hugely upsetting, particularly if the person says something really *grim* (like advocating bombing Iraq and killing everyone in the entire country because they were 'behind 9/11', which happened to me once). Then you're stuck thinking 'but you were so *nice*! We were eating cheese together! What happened?'
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