Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Take Strictly, as Directed

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  • Stephen Judd,

    the German movie industry

    I thought we were avoiding stereotyping here?

    (I still have a copy of Dundes' Life is like a Chicken Coop Ladder lying around somewhere, in which book he controversially posited that scatology was deeply embedded in German folk culture, tying Swabian folk rhymes, Luther and the holocaust into one folkloric mess. It also has a lot of funny poo jokes in it.)

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 3122 posts Report Reply

  • Josh Addison,

    I'd just like for there to be a word for 'not kinky' that isn't 'normal'.

    Yeah, I'd like that too - I was conscious of posting an objection without actually offering an alternative, which pisses me off when other people do it...

    Onehunga, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 298 posts Report Reply

  • Tim Michie,

    Among the sites I read, male subs and female Dommes are both referred to as 'unicorns', due to the extent to which their existence is ignored.

    I wonder whether boingboing know what with they're Unicorn Chaser but it would certainly take your mind off things and that was the aim...

    Auckward • Since Nov 2006 • 614 posts Report Reply

  • 3410,

    I'd just like for there to be a word for 'not kinky' that isn't 'normal'.

    Erotypical?

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report Reply

  • Josh Addison,

    In terms of educational experiences, Warren Ellis' blog (NSFW, depending on what's taken his interest that day) has taught me many things, mostly involving the merits of clicking a link titled "Conan, What is Best in Life?" <\injoke>

    Onehunga, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 298 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    French vanilla, on the other hand...

    The real stuff gets its distinctive flavour and slight yellow tinge from egg yolk. Read into that what you will.

    An interesting read - thanks. I imagine everyone has a list of sexual practices that make them go "ew" or even just "I don't geddit"

    Sure -- on the shortlist of most uncomfortable conversational openers ever was the (female) lunch date -- who has no idea of the intimate indoor voice -- who bawled in my general direction: "You're a fag, why does even thinking about sucking cock make me want to gag?" Thanks, hon', outed and grossed out all at once...

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    But I don't see 'vanilla' as boring. I love vanilla as a flavour.

    Also a pleasantly base for whatever combo of garnish, sauce or random foliage floats your taste buds, one might think. :)

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    "You're a fag, why does even thinking about sucking cock make me want to gag?" Thanks, hon', outed and grossed out all at once...

    "And today on Ask a Fag, anal sex: why is it only inherently degrading for women?"...

    Erotypical?

    Not bad. I think it's Trinity on that comment thread who says, look okay, all you not-kinkies go away and work out what you want to be called, and then we'll call you that. In the meantime...

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    "And today on Ask a Fag,

    We sooo have to pitch that to NZ On Air. Why should Brown suck up all the glamour?

    anal sex: why is it only inherently degrading for women?"...

    Please... I've already over explaining that teh gayz aren't all parties to the anal apocalypse, and just because you were drunk and the only thing that went up your arse last night was your pathetic closet case head, you're still a flaming queer. There are days when getting to a nunnery looks extremely attractive.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Helen T,

    Not bad. I think it's Trinity on that comment thread who says, look okay, all you not-kinkies go away and work out what you want to be called, and then we'll call you that. In the meantime...

    It is Trinity indeed *goes back to reading said thread*

    Yorkshire (West if you're… • Since Jun 2009 • 14 posts Report Reply

  • Lyndon Hood,

    I wonder whether boingboing know...

    Unicorn chaser LOL

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1115 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    "And today on Ask a Fag,"

    We sooo have to pitch that to NZ On Air. Why should Brown suck up all the glamour?

    Not feeling remotely glamorous today. Will probably have to front up and present the show tomorrow night with a thumping cold, then get up first thing the next day, go to a meeting, fly to Christchurch and talk to students.

    The only consolation is the prospect of introducing Hart and Dalziel over dinner later on. Perhaps we'll go somewhere with vanilla.

    But to answer your question (yes, alright, it wasn't a question), 'Ask A Fag' is a great idea. The problem isn't getting NZ On Air to fund it, it's getting the networks to screen it ...

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22754 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I'd just like for there to be a word for 'not kinky' that isn't 'normal

    Ken and Barbie ? normalacious? standardista, or my fav of all Lisa and Gary Johnston
    <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvdlvNdVI-I>
    Not only better than a poke in the eye,there is one.:)

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    OOps

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Damn, Sofie, this is the most disturbing sex scene ever -- think its the absence of genitalia that does it.

    The problem isn't getting NZ On Air to fund it, it's getting the networks to screen it ...

    Oh well, back to the proposal for 'Psychics Sense Gangs of Morbidly Obese Teenage Pit Bulls With Leaky Breast Implants and Funny Looking (But Very Big) Penises Gone Wild on P in South Auckland'. Got Paul Holmes' cell number?

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • Angus Robertson,

    The person with the power to bring the whole thing to a screaming halt, whose needs supercede the other party’s, is the sub.

    Its a voluntary coupling where no one has power over the other, either of them can walk away and end the thing. If the dom(me) is not having fun then that is the end, just as much as if the sub is unhappy.

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 984 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    'Psychics Sense Gangs of Morbidly Obese Teenage Pit Bulls With Leaky Breast Implants and Funny Looking (But Very Big) Penises Gone Wild on P in South Auckland'.

    So,back to basics eh?

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Josh Addison,

    Now that I'm at home and able to look up the link: the self-promoting reference to French vanilla I would have made earlier.

    Onehunga, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 298 posts Report Reply

  • Joanna,

    Dear Craig: please don't ever mention Paul Holmes in a thread about kinky sex ever again.

    Yours,

    The entire world.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 746 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    So,back to basics eh?

    I prefer to call it reaching my target demographic with an iron fist in a full length rubber glove.

    Dear Craig: please don't ever mention Paul Holmes in a thread about kinky sex ever again.

    Paul Holmes' sex life (even if it does lurch towards new frontiers in autoeroticism) isn't kinky enough for you? I can see Christmas shopping being more than usually challenging this year.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 12370 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    The only consolation is the prospect of introducing Hart and Dalziel over dinner later on

    And I shall be hiding behind a ficus, recording a bootleg of the whole thing.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7473 posts Report Reply

  • Islander,

    And I shall actually be the monstera deliciosa to the left awaiting copy of aforesaid bootleg...the mind is unreeling at the thought-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Morgan Nichol,

    Vanilla, seems to me to be merely dismissive, so doesn't feel nearly as nasty as Breeder.

    As for the awful English B&D witch hunts, I've got a couple of friends who fled England for that very reason, escaping to our liberal isles where we - at least mostly - let consenting adults be consenting adults.

    Auckland CBD • Since Nov 2006 • 313 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Its a voluntary coupling where no one has power over the other, either of them can walk away and end the thing. If the dom(me) is not having fun then that is the end, just as much as if the sub is unhappy.

    I have this whole 'yeah but nah but yeah' thing going on here. It's different, I feel. It is very much a part of the culture that the sub's happiness is the Dom(me)'s responsibility. The reverse, not so much. I think there'd probably be some disagreement about whose fault it is if the Dom(me) isn't having fun: the sub's or the Dom(me)'s. Some people are very down on topping from the bottom or pushy subs, some not so much.

    The only consolation is the prospect of introducing Hart and Dalziel over dinner later on

    And I shall be hiding behind a ficus, recording a bootleg of the whole thing.

    I shall be on my best behaviour, unfortunately. Well, at least initially.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Zippy Gonzales,

    Once flatted with a fetishist. There are times it's good to be deaf, what with trying to read while some chick tied to a bed is waiting eight hours to climax next door.

    The mindsets of BDSM fascinate me. The master is the servant is the master...

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 186 posts Report Reply

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