Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: What Sorry Looks Like

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  • Rosemary McDonald,

    And speaking about the Media....

    This article appeared on Stuff the other day...

    Moko Sayviah Rangitoheriri's sister told social worker toddler was being abused

    Seven-year-old Anna told Trina Marama, a trained social worker who worked for Te Whare Oranga Wairua Maori Women's Refuge in Taupo, that her three-year-old brother was being abused by Shailer.

    The manager of the refuge, Mahia Te Tomo, said that Marama phoned Shailer to ask if that were true and Shailer blamed the seven year old for the abuse. Marama believed Shailer, even though the refuge was aware Shailer herself had escaped from a violent relationship with Haerewa and had returned to that relationship after Haerewa was let out of prison.

    Marama supported Shailer at a meeting with CYFs on July 30, 2015, approximately 11 days before Moko died, where Shailer made allegations about Moko's mother, Nicola Dally-Paki.

    But despite this, at no time did any adult from the refuge or CYFs go to the home to check on three-year-old Moko. Read said Shailer's allegation that the children were at risk from their mother was taken at face value. No checks were made of Shailer and Read said CYFs was unaware that Shailer herself had fled an abusive relationship.

    Because CYFs took Shailer at her word, no one visited the home,

    Moko died a miserable, painful lonely death.

    According to the article, disclosures were made, and nothing was done.

    I won't have been the only person bitterly disappointed by the inaction from Te Whare Oranga Wairua Maori Women's Refuge in Taupo to whom Moko's sister disclosed the abuse, and who did worse than nothing....they believed the abuser.

    Yesterday Women's Refuge says that the claim that Moko's sister disclosed the abuse to Trina Marama from Te Whare Oranga Wairua Maori Women's Refuge in Taupo is untrue.

    Florence Kerr's piece on Stuff goes into detail. She quotes the manager of Te Whare Oranga Wairua Maori Women's Refuge in Taupo...who says

    that Marama phoned Shailer to ask if that were true and Shailer blamed the seven year old for the abuse. Marama believed Shailer, even though the refuge was aware Shailer herself had escaped from a violent relationship with Haerewa and had returned to that relationship after Haerewa was let out of prison.

    Yet , Chief Executive of Women’s Refuge Dr Ang Jury, now says

    This is untrue.

    We had not heard any direct allegation from a child on our programme that an adult had physically hurt Moko or any other children. Had this in fact occurred I am sure the response would have been very different.

    “It is only now, with the benefit of hindsight, that all of us can look back and wonder what might have happened if more was done for this family,” she said.

    This is so much bullshit...

    Waikato, or on the road • Since Apr 2014 • 1344 posts Report Reply

  • Rosemary McDonald,

    Stacey Kirk calls for a Ministerial Inquiry into the torture and murder of Moko Rangitoheriri.

    It was not just the two people who beat, tortured and eventually killed three-year-old Moko Rangitoheriri who knew the little boy was at risk. There were others.

    Tania Shailer and David Haerewa committed unimaginably sadistic violence against a toddler. Some of the others who failed him are good people.

    They're all complicit in Moko's death.

    The little girl who felt so responsible for the plight of her brother spoke up, despite one of their carers (now killer) Tania Shailer – a friend of the children's mother – telling her she'd kill her parents if she said anything.

    This public culture of not intervening is beyond disgraceful, so here's the list of people and organisations that we know knew something – there are likely more:

    The Maori Women's Refuge social worker: she followed up the seven-year-old's claim by ringing Shailer. Shailer lied and blamed Moko's sister. She said she feared for Moko's safety once he was back in the hands of his mother.

    The refuge was aware Shailer herself had escaped from a violent relationship with Haerewa and had returned to that relationship after Haerewa was let out of prison.

    The same social worker was there when Shailer went in to CYF to say the children were at risk of being exposed to domestic violence.

    Shailer told CYF she wasn't coping with Moko, 11 days before his death. CYF denies being told Moko was being hurt.

    Shailer told a friend Moko had fallen from a woodpile, when his situation was becoming dire. The friend was concerned, but never spoke up when Shailer declined her offer to drive them to the hospital.

    At no point did anyone go to see Moko.

    Frances Kerr updates her original piece, and includes the fact that Dr Ang Jury, CEO of Women's Refuge

    ...disputed details of what they were told.

    "We had not heard any direct allegation from a child on our programme that an adult had physically hurt Moko or any other children. Had this in fact occurred I am sure the response would have been very different."

    Now, this still stinks.

    I emailed Frances Kerr the other night, confused as to why a manager of a regional Women's Refuge would say one thing, and the CEO of the National organisation would say that was untrue.

    Frances's response was that they stood by their article.

    She also strongly exhorted me to continue to support Women's Refuge, stating quite rightly that for years volunteers have saved many women and children from domestic violence.

    Which I will, once the truth emerges.

    This is what "sorry" looks like.

    A respected national advocacy group, now corporatised by government funding, behaves just like an abuser...

    Dismisses. Dissembles. Denies.

    Waikato, or on the road • Since Apr 2014 • 1344 posts Report Reply

  • Sister Mary Gearchange, in reply to Rosemary McDonald,

    I wonder if people who engage in psychological abuse and manipulation within a family or relationship setting should also be similarly held to such high standards viz responsibility for their actions? Is psychological or emotional violence as bad as physical? Worse? Less? Simply different and not something to try and compare/rank/place value judgments upon? Personally, and fully acknowledging that in many (most?) instances the emotional is frequently interwoven with the physical, I incline towards the latter - however you want to dissemble it after the fact, it's all unacceptable. If we have to have labels then the label "Bad" for both is simply enough. Someone that torments and violates another person's trust and emotional and psychological wellbeing should probably be similarly socially ostracized. I wonder if that will happen for those guilty of that who are writing here with such righteous indignation? Do they see what they have done? Given the pattern of actions covering decades of abuse, I'm guessing not.

    Since Oct 2015 • 19 posts Report Reply

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