Up Front by Emma Hart

Read Post

Up Front: Casual, Shallow and Meaningless

223 Responses

First ←Older Page 1 4 5 6 7 8 9 Newer→ Last

  • JacksonP, in reply to Sofie Bribiesca,

    yes going now :)

    Bingo!

    ETA: So we appear to have mastered this smalltalk thing.

    See you soon.
    ‘Not if I see you first’.

    Auckland • Since Mar 2011 • 2450 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to Steve Barnes,

    Smalltalk? pub

    Rhubarb, hubbub...

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Gregor Ronald, in reply to Russell Brown,

    What's "hair"?

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 103 posts Report

  • JacksonP,

    So tonight in a real life example of this discussion we learnt the phrase 'so where do you fit in?' works quite well.

    Although it is not too much of a stretch to imagine the circumstances in which such an inquiry could be misconstrued.

    Auckland • Since Mar 2011 • 2450 posts Report

  • Rich Lock,

    What would be some good ice breakers that aren’t of the How are you?, What do you do variety?

    I might try "what are you interested in?". As Emma has mentioned a couple of times, watching someone get their freak on about something they're passionate about is pretty entertaining for both parties.

    What’s “hair”?

    Part of an English upper classes smalltalk introduction 'Air, hair lair. How do you do?'

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report

  • Sacha, in reply to Rich Lock,

    I might try "what are you interested in?"

    I knew someone who routinely went straight for the jugular with "what are you passionate about". Her all-round cuteness may have helped overcome any initial resistance.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • 3410,

    "what are you passionate about"

    Ugh. Even all-round cuteness doesn't excuse that.

    Auckland • Since Jan 2007 • 2618 posts Report

  • Sacha, in reply to 3410,

    Worked a treat. Cut to the chase. Charming though so probably could have got away with asking anythng.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Rich Lock,

    Yeah, the P-word has been comprehensively devalued by a billion bad recruitment ads and similar marketing shite.

    There are currently 1,339 jobs advertised on Seek that use that word.

    Including one that asks if you're 'passionate about 2-3 year-olds?'. Did no-one at the recruiters double-take that before posting and decide to have a rethink on the wording?

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report

  • Sacha, in reply to Rich Lock,

    This was in the 90s before the word got corporately thrashed (but after any residual hippies had finished with it).

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel, in reply to Rich Lock,

    Words for lost, am I...

    Yeah, the P-word has been comprehensively devalued...

    Just like 'Vibrancy' in Chchch, which is trotted out by our Great Communicator at the drop of a hat or the opening of a bus stop - in this case it is laughably paired with 'restore' - I hadn't noticed much vibrancy in the inner city even well before the actual shaking started.

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Steve Barnes, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    ‘Vibrancy’

    I think that would be a great descriptor for Christchurch.
    "What do you do?"
    "I vibrate"

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report

  • Joe Wylie, in reply to Ian Dalziel,

    Just like ‘Vibrancy’ in Chchch, which is trotted out by our Great Communicator at the drop of a hat . . .

    "Vibrancy". Fnarr fnarrr. (Caution: Semi-sfw).

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report

  • Steve Barnes,

    That picture kinda says "I've got one too"

    Peria • Since Dec 2006 • 5521 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel,

    how to make friends and influence people...
    There's possibly a great opportunity for someone who can draw,
    on the Big Idea jobs list at the moment...
    It sorta even sounds like it could be the graphic novel
    of Emma's Great Blend story - fun!

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Speaking of...

    ...“Vibrancy”. Fnarr, Fnarr.

    Vibrancy (sounds like Viper) Fnart fine art...
    an early Joe Wylie classic as reprinted in the
    Spanish underground comic magazine El Vibora...
    - hope ya don't mind Joe, great colouring -
    I remember the original in black in Strips.

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Kyle Matthews,

    I still haven't worked out a way to say "I've got a TV show" without sounding like a wanker ...

    Lucky that the government is shutting that channel down to solve that problem for ya.

    Since Nov 2006 • 6243 posts Report

  • Hebe,

    Hebe: you must come out the next time we go for Beers and Talking About Sex

    Why thank you Emma; I could try to listen.
    BTW if you need a non-braindead hairdresser try Teo at Shambhala, now in an otherworldly Thai tea garden (really) near the South Library.

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2899 posts Report

  • Isabel Hitchings, in reply to Hebe,

    Why thank you Emma; I could try to listen.

    A couple of drinks next to Emma and you'll be over-sharing with the rest of us.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report

  • Hebe, in reply to Isabel Hitchings,

    A couple of drinks next to Emma and you'll be over-sharing with the rest of us

    Actually I don't drink (then I can remember what everyone said) and my real name is Peg Bundy...

    Christchurch • Since May 2011 • 2899 posts Report

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Pearls before swan…

    …at Shambhala, now in an otherworldly Thai
    tea garden (really) near the South Library

    In Ernlea Tce at the end of the dead end st (for cars) opposite South Library – called Swan Lake – it’s where I get my fresh water, they have diverted a lead from their spring out onto the street – I used to play round there as a kid, when it was a run down abandoned mansion with an overgrown lake with a sunken punt in it, magic place – it has scrubbed up nicely…

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7953 posts Report

  • Islander, in reply to Jackie Clark,

    Okay, this has made me think. Everyone is, at some stage, strangers to each other. So how have you initiated your friendships?

    Interesting question Jackie: for me, it has been physical proximity & a large amount of time, and shared experiences (from floods to bonfires; from teaching the neighbours about hangi, and them teaching me about barbecues; from sharing griefs, and supporting each other in the bad times… and lustily celebrating the good ones.)

    It’s not so much initiating a friendship as having it grow over the decades.
    This applies to some of my family in-laws too-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report

  • Lucy Stewart,

    Okay, this has made me think. Everyone is, at some stage, strangers to each other. So how have you initiated your friendships?

    With great difficulty.

    More seriously: via the Internet, or through discovery of shared interests. I would love an Idiot's Guide To Making Friends With People. I can socialise without making a complete fool of myself - or if I can't, no-one's been unkind enough to tell me - but the step from acquaintance to active socialising outside of obligatory contexts (work, university, clubs, etc)? Still a bit of a mystery. It's happened, but I couldn't tell you how.

    (Of course, this is largely because I'm fairly introverted and the difficulty/benefit ratio has never been on the side of me putting a lot of effort into learning this stuff, but it still would have been nice to know how.)

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report

  • Amy Gale,

    I rather like "what have you been reading lately?" because it's broad enough to encompass whatever item they actually want to talk about and because you then get to talk about books. And because if it doesn't work, that's ok too because I've still learned something significant, if negative. Like this one time, I was seated next to a reasonably-famous [field redacted] at dinner and his answer was along the lines of "I don't read books, I just write them".

    I have another one but I might want to use it when I come to NZ in a week.

    tha Ith • Since May 2007 • 471 posts Report

  • Lucy Stewart, in reply to Amy Gale,

    his answer was along the lines of "I don't read books, I just write them".

    I wonder if he realises that's pretty much the same as advising people to not bother reading anything he writes, on the grounds it has a high probability of being awful?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report

First ←Older Page 1 4 5 6 7 8 9 Newer→ Last

Post your response…

This topic is closed.