Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: The Ex Files

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  • Emma Hart,

    I note that Paul's career seems vastly more exciting than mine so far.

    Ditto, I'm starting to feel a bit whiny now.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Paul Campbell,

    my career fortunately wasn't that exciting - at the time I was the mystery employee - the guy who architected some of the major products but only came in 1/2 a day a week, most people (including the crazy one) had never met me - this was pre-internet, I lived 100km miles away and had young kids - I worked at home, time shifted and spent the mornings with my kids, until they got old enough to go off to pre-school.

    These days I still work at home but 10,000km away from work, time-shifted the other way (I start insanely early now) and go into work once or twice a year - so my kids can be teenagers growing up in NZ ..... sadly I don't get to hang out at the park every morning with them and the other mothers any more though.

    Dunedin • Since Nov 2006 • 2623 posts Report

  • Karen White,

    <It boggles me how these people hold jobs>

    Unfortunatley this ex-boss owned the company so therefore (in his mind) he 'owned' us too, as he paid our wages.

    Still tho, not nearly as exciting as Paul!

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 79 posts Report

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    I remember you and Pauline being unable to work out what I saw in Mike the Bartender, and me waiting until he was walking away from us and saying 'there it is'. But that may turn out to not have been you at all.

    I think I do remember that.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report

  • Eric Dutton,

    The question was answered on National Radio this afternoon. Sea Lions give birth around boxing day and are impregnated within three days. This is made more comfortable because they have two uterusses or uteri or whatever. If someone calls you bisexal it just means that your breath smells of fish.

    Whangarei • Since Nov 2006 • 13 posts Report

  • Lucy Stewart,

    If someone calls you bisexal it just means that your breath smells of fish.

    One can't help feeling this would interfere somewhat with the acquisition of multiple spouses.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2105 posts Report

  • JoJo,

    When I stumbled upon the Peter Principle in the dictionary, I felt an overwhelming sense of ... comfort. It became apparent that other people had incompetent bosses who mis-used their supposed power to mask their inability to do their job. It was a bitter-sweet realisation.

    Wellington • Since Jul 2008 • 95 posts Report

  • Sacha,

    The Peter Principle explains ending up one level higher than is warranted. The example I mentioned sits several layers too high, and is so distasteful that charm can't be the answer.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • TracyMac,

    I like JackElder's relationship (or sex) calculus at the beginning of the thread.

    I think there was a point at which she spent more time thinking about my sex life than I did.

    Those who can, do. Those who can't write shitty inappropriate letters to their employees.

    (Yes, it's probably inappropriate for me to speculate on the state of their sex life, but hey, stories like that bring out the bitch in me.)

    Canberra, West Island • Since Nov 2006 • 701 posts Report

  • 81stcolumn,

    The Peter Principle explains ending up one level higher than is warranted. The example I mentioned sits several layers too high, and is so distasteful that charm can't be the answer.

    So would some variation on the Post Turtle be more applicable ?

    Nawthshaw • Since Nov 2006 • 790 posts Report

  • Public Servant on a tea-break.,

    “On an unrelated note, if you are going to have sex with your ten wives and husbands, we'll set up a pay site. Streaming video. Web 2.0! I'll take a cut. Call me, we'll put together a deal.”

    Count me out John. Based on my limited (and utterly clothed) contact with individuals who actually group together to do that sort of thing, I’d pay money not to watch. Not that I am presuming that Emma looks repellent naked (or even speculating on the topic), but nine of the other ten spouses could be guaranteed to.

    “It boggles me how these people hold jobs. I mean, my ex-boss was running her own business, but she also had a real-life middle-management job where she had to deal with real people face to face, and we were seriously considering that she might be an actual sociopath. Yet once you get on to this subject, these mad bosses don't seem that uncommon.”

    I once had a boss who had is position because he could wear a suit and convince a bank to lend him money. Once he owed the bank the money, well they were stuck with him, and so was I. Your former boss puts him in the shade though Emma.

    Wellington • Since Apr 2008 • 67 posts Report

  • Emma Hart,

    Not that I am presuming that Emma looks repellent naked

    Aw, thanks, that's sweet.

    (Yes, it's probably inappropriate for meto speculate on the state of their sex life, but hey, stories like that bring out the bitch in me.)

    You can rest assured that her former employees have said much, much worse.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Andrew Stevenson,

    Is

    Aw, thanks, that's sweet

    Related to

    What I learned from this was to hone my sarcasm to such a razor-sharp edge it was barely noticeable.

    By any chance?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 206 posts Report

  • Public Servant on a tea-break.,

    "Is 'Aw, thanks, that's sweet'

    Related to 'What I learned from this was to hone my sarcasm to such a razor-sharp edge it was barely noticeable.'

    By any chance?"

    I was going with a solid 'Yip' on that one Andrew. Still it's nice to be replied to...

    Wellington • Since Apr 2008 • 67 posts Report

  • Emma Hart,

    You guys are assuming that I can still tell when I'm being sarcastic.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Bart Janssen,

    I have encountered a government manager with such abysmal communication and reasoning skills and lack of empathy that I can't for the life of me figure how they even got through the job interview let alone getting constantly promoted and affecting actual people's lives. Can't be that hard to fire them or demand human decency, surely.

    Did you check out his/her boss?

    Good managers respond to gaps in their own ability or knowledge by surrounding themselves with competent people whose knowledge they can rely on and whose advise they take willingly.

    Crap managers respond to their own weaknesses by surrounding themselves with even worse lower tier managers whose sole ability is that they never identify their boss's failings.

    Hence, if you see a crap manager hold onto his/her job for any length of time, the bet is their boss is even more crap.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 4461 posts Report

  • Sacha,

    I believe their boss inherited them rather than hired them. Still there, but.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report

  • Emma Hart,

    Hence, if you see a crap manager hold onto his/her job for any length of time, the bet is their boss is even more crap.

    Man that's depressing.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report

  • Andrew Stevenson,

    Hence, if you see a crap manager hold onto his/her job for any length of time, the bet is their boss is even more crap.

    Not sure if you'd win that bet 100% of the time.
    Sometimes its the organisation that is crap
    Sometimes its the boss
    Sometimes its both

    Now that is depressing

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 206 posts Report

  • Bart Janssen,

    Man that's depressing

    Yeah for a while. And then you remember there are more things in life than work. Or more accurately there are more important things than bureaucracy at work.

    Reading David Hayward's latest on PAS for example, or Emma Hart's :).
    Or looking through old boxes at home and discovering embarrassing photos.
    Or just eating a nice meal with one's significant other(s), how do you get a booking for 16 Emma?.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 4461 posts Report

  • Rich Lock,

    You guys are assuming that I can still tell when I'm being sarcastic.

    Hmmm, be careful with that. We all know what happens to witches who lose the ability to tell the difference.

    back in the mother countr… • Since Feb 2007 • 2728 posts Report

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