Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: The Up Front Guide: Dressing for "Success"

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  • Joe Wylie,

    Yeah, see, I'm calling 'actual sensitive pretending to be fake-sensitive to get laid'.

    I know that I really shouldn't go there, but I'm driven to picture that. The sounds he made as he was deconstructed were a bit like a faked orgasm?

    flat earth • Since Jan 2007 • 4593 posts Report Reply

  • Logan O'Callahan,

    It does depend somewhat on the thing. As demonstrated ably by a good-looking young man of my acquaintance whose passionate speeches are largely based around the finer details of power supplies. Other engineers' eyes glaze over, let alone the rest of us.

    AC or DC.

    Since Apr 2008 • 70 posts Report Reply

  • johnno,

    The fireman's jacket works. Unbelievably, twice. Although in both cases I suspect the poor confused wench wanted to nick it when I wasn't looking. I lent it to a friend, and he confirmed the phenomenon.

    wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 111 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I've only seen that work for the visiting lecturer...

    Well, it was either this guy's knowledge of post-modernism, or my in-depth understanding of existentialism, which just sounds like the worst party in the world.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    The sounds he made as he was deconstructed were a bit like a faked orgasm?

    He just played back that Meg Ryan scene with a knowing smirk (from the back of his Harley)

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • Isabel Hitchings,

    Well, it was either this guy's knowledge of post-modernism, or my in-depth understanding of existentialism, which just sounds like the worst party in the world.

    I thought it was his arse.

    Christchurch • Since Jul 2007 • 719 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    It usually is

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    I thought it was his arse.

    Well, I'm hardly going to point out his knowledge of post-modernism while we're watching him tend bar, am I?

    (The arse may have been a significant factor, it's true. You know what I need? Fewer people who know me.)

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    You know what I need? Fewer people who know me

    Well you've come to the wrong place!

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • Sofie Bribiesca,

    I lent it to a friend, and he confirmed the phenomenon.

    And then there was the dress Marines Jacket. Mmm shiny buttons. Actually makes a great mini dress.

    here and there. • Since Nov 2007 • 6796 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    I thought we just looked for the FMBs?

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1590 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    Well, it was either this guy's knowledge of post-modernism, or my in-depth understanding of existentialism

    Wait, was that... No, couldn't have been. But then, hang on, did he go on to quote Shakespeare?

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Tony Parker,

    Is it time for this then?

    and a 90's version

    Napier • Since Nov 2008 • 232 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Littlewood,

    This advice is all well and good Emma, but where does it leave a respective male such as myself? Especially one holed up in Timaru for most of the time.

    Today, Tomorrow, Timaru • Since Jan 2007 • 449 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    No this charming man.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    This advice is all well and good Emma, but where does it leave a respective male such as myself? Especially one holed up in Timaru for most of the time.

    My memories of any and all sex I had in Timaru bear an element of regret.

    Just sayin'.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22850 posts Report Reply

  • Tony Parker,

    In my defence, it's by World rather than Hallensteins

    Don't you be dissing the House of H now. It's clothed me and my kids for a while now!

    Napier • Since Nov 2008 • 232 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Littlewood,

    Don't you be dissing the House of H now. It's clothed me and my kids for a while now!

    On a slightly serious note, the ubiquitousness of Hallensteins (and Glassons) clothes on a night out on the town in either Christchurch or Dunedin is one of those eternal things, like the wind in Wellington, Black Caps middle-order collapses, or the Highlanders getting progressively worse with each passing year.

    Today, Tomorrow, Timaru • Since Jan 2007 • 449 posts Report Reply

  • Tony Parker,

    On a slightly serious note, the ubiquitousness of Hallensteins (and Glassons) clothes on a night out on the town in either Christchurch or Dunedin

    You could be describing Napier there as well.

    Napier • Since Nov 2008 • 232 posts Report Reply

  • Matthew Littlewood,

    I'm pretty sure I'm describing almost anywhere in NZ, on second thoughts....

    Today, Tomorrow, Timaru • Since Jan 2007 • 449 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    You know what I need? Fewer people who know me

    Move to Auckland :)

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    This advice is all well and good Emma, but where does it leave a respective male such as myself? Especially one holed up in Timaru for most of the time.

    Join the volunteer fire brigade - or at least become chummy enough to borrow their jackets

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19745 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    But yeah, people who are passionate about things, and enthuse: Hot.

    It's one of the things I most like about young people. They haven't learned to be all cynical, and still hold out hope that people might give a shit what they reckon.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10657 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    My memories of any and all sex I had in Timaru bear an element of regret.

    Just sayin'.

    QFT. It's probably not enough samples to establish a pattern, but is it a risk you want to take?

    But then, hang on, did he go on to quote Shakespeare?

    He was certainly capable of doing so. Wouldn't have done it to impress me, though, as I was doing two post-grad Ren drama courses at the time.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4651 posts Report Reply

  • Don Christie,

    why it's so easy to spot Stripy Shirts even when they're not wearing stripy shirts.

    If they are untucked they are stripy shirted...and probably also from north of the Bombay Hills.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1645 posts Report Reply

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