Pass the crisps: UK Election watch

497 Responses

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  • Craig Ranapia,

    This is.

    He's right. Worse than bestiality porn.

    Oh, for frak's sake -- though shalt not take the most parodied/hommaged political graphic since Che got trendy in vain? If that's worse than Fanny getting arse-banged by a Doberman-dot-com, Mr. Brooker needs to do a perv-Google and harden the fuck up.

    The absolute peak of irony. A Murdoch owned paper copying Obama???

    No, Blair, it was a rip of a rather famous graphic.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    In some ways its better to have the uk system where one can choose a paper to suit ones politics than the nz option where all papers (and the tv) are Tory but tone it down a bit.

    The uk voting system is institutionalised fraud, of course and any party that comes out of this election in majority government can fairly be said to have stolen it. The only way this might end is if the Brits finally lose it Greek style.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 4209 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    I've never claimed the Electoral College was evil.

    No you didn't -- more of a general tease. :) The Electoral College is every bit as absurd as it ever was, but some people who were hot to dump it when Dubya was the beneficiary seem to have come around.

    The only way this might end is if the Brits finally lose it Greek style.

    Kind of shit for the people who'd have their businesses and workplaces destroyed. Totally shit for the corpses. Don't really think the British electoral system is that bad.

    The uk voting system is institutionalised fraud, of course and any party that comes out of this election in majority government can fairly be said to have stolen it.

    No. Just, no.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • DeepRed,

    Another extreme example is the 1993 Canadian federal election, where the ProgCons got reduced to an embarrasing 2 seats out of 295 - yes, two seats - in spite of getting 16% of the overall vote.

    The southernmost capital … • Since Nov 2006 • 3897 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Another extreme example is the 1993 Canadian federal election, where the ProgCons got reduced to an embarrasing 2 seats out of 295 - yes, two seats - in spite of getting 16% of the overall vote.

    But wasn't that more about the dramatic collapse of Mulroney's unpopular government and the "grand coalition" that made up the ProgCons vote? It allowed the Liberals to come through the middle and win a plurality of the vote in a hell of a lot of seats; and a lot of right-wing support went to the Bloc Québécois and Reform Parties.

    While I take your point, I don't know if you can blame the Canadian electoral system for the Progressive Conservatives losing their shit in the most embarrasing way possible.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    Double post. Is the UK Electorate Disengaged?. Was looking for this voter turnout stuff earlier in response to the Voter Power website. Isn't the turnout relevant to this in some way?

    PS. Turns out Tunbridge Wells was 65.8% in 2005. Much higher than average, so guess not going to influence things as much as in other cases.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Graeme Edgeler,

    He's right. Worse than bestiality porn.

    And yet you linked to it.

    It's nice to know that linking to bestiality pornography is above the minimum standard for PAS. No. Wait. That's not nice to know at all.

    I know people here aren't likely to be fans of David Cameron, and there's definitely a place for partisanship, but describing a picture of him as not just pornographic, but "worse than bestiality porn" is way out there. It's beyond just about anything the most strident tea party birther has said about Obama. Ian Wishart has never gone that far.* WhaleOil wouldn't go that far.

    A new low. And given the political climate in democracies I've followed over recent years, that's saying something.

    *EDIT: maybe he has, didn't he run a Howard Broad bestiality piece? Oh well, you're still worse than WhaleOil =)

    Wellington, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 2968 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    Bootle 47.7 53,700

    So what were the other 28,000+ doing? On the bootle perhaps?

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • JackElder,

    So what were the other 28,000+ doing? On the bootle perhaps?

    They were on the other foot.

    Wellington • Since Mar 2008 • 707 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    A new low.

    What are you on? I didn't know there was a pill for losing any sense for sarcasm. Too much courtroom detail?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8015 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    What are you on? I didn't know there was a pill for losing any sense for sarcasm.

    Ben: I consume Brooker's acid drops like fine vintage wine, and am certainly the last to credibly bitch anyone for a salty turn of phrase. But come on -- a rather cheesy rip of an already cheesy graphic that has been imitated and parodied endlessly over the last two year being worse than animal porn? Really?

    WhaleOil and the Kiwibuggers are rather fond of telling people to get a sense of humour too -- but it would so help if they actually said something amusing. C'est pas de la tarte, I guess.

    maybe he has, didn't he run a Howard Broad bestiality piece?

    Well, not quite. But you could be forgiven for coming away with the impression that Broad's favourite movie is Debbie Does Dog-Ass.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    But come on -- a rather cheesy rip of an already cheesy graphic that has been imitated and parodied endlessly over the last two year being worse than animal porn? Really?

    Choose your own ordering and punctuation for the following 3 words:

    Not
    No
    Obviously

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8015 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    On a slightly more cheerful note, there's the prospect of up to 350 new MPs rocking up to the Palace of Westminster next week. They better not be in any rush for an office.:

    There are concerns in the Commons that the system of allocating MPs' offices could descend into chaos because there is no protocol for sharing offices when no party has an overall majority.

    A draft guide for new members, seen by the Guardian, reveals that in the parliamentary "freshers' week" whips will be organising "buddies" for some new MPs in the guise of returning MPs who will share the new members' offices until all desks have been allocated.

    More MPs will be given a laptop and there will be banks of desks set up in communal areas in Portcullis House for members to hot-desk from until they can be assigned a permanent office. From noon on Friday, a reception centre will welcome new MPs and issue security passes, email addresses and laptops.

    Officials have been rehearsing the arrival of new MPs, who are expected on Monday morning, using hundreds of volunteers as stand-ins.

    A senior source said: "There have been numbers of volunteers pretending to be new MPs presenting themselves with every scenario so that people can rehearse the reception arrangements.

    "Offices are allocated by the whips but a hung parliament makes that complication. Nobody has ever really experienced it before. In the 1970s, MPs had very small offices and maybe half a secretary. Now they generally have extensive offices and more staff. It could be quite chaotic."

    I think a lot of someones will be on a steady diet of asprin and black coffee for the rest of the month. :)

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    But come on -- a rather cheesy rip of an already cheesy graphic that has been imitated and parodied endlessly over the last two year being worse than animal porn? Really?

    Craig! Your account has been hijacked!

    Seriously, dude: I don't need to remind you of some of your own more colourful turns of phrase, do I?

    Also, no, not really. As if that wasn't actually obvious.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 17941 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    A new low. And given the political climate in democracies I've followed over recent years, that's saying something.

    Oh, for fuck's sake. Are you at all familiar with Charlie Brooker's style? It was a joke, employing a fairly common device called hyperbole.

    No one actually thinks it's worse than bestial porn. It's an absurd description of an absurd front page. Was that not absolutely, utterly, 150% obvious?

    And apart from anything else, the target of the barb wasn't Cameron anyway: it's The Sun newspaper.

    Here is the original tweet from Charlie Brooker:

    Sun front page somehow manages to be embarrassingly lame yet more offensive than bestial porn

    Now stop being ridiculous.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 17941 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Seriously, dude: I don't need to remind you of some of your own more colourful turns of phrase, do I?

    I'm still trying to think about how Debbie could do dog-ass. Perhaps she goes all Edward Penishands about it.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8015 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Further, my own description of it in a tweet was:

    The Sun's unspeakably hideous election-day front page

    Did I actually think it was literally "unspeakably hideous"? No, of course not. I was using hyperbole to a humorous end. It really is a very common thing that people do.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 17941 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    Anyone who uses the phrase "Fanny getting arse-banged by a Doberman-dot-com" has to be winding you up

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 15716 posts Report Reply

  • giovanni tiso,

    The only way a thread about the UK elections could become animated was always going to be through somebody missing a point most spectacularly. And perhaps deliberately.

    Wellington • Since Jun 2007 • 7315 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    Oh, for fuck's sake. Are you at all familiar with Charlie Brooker's style? It was a joke, employing a fairly common device called hyperbole.

    Well, Russell, you did turn me into a Brooker addict so, yeah, I'm reasonably familiar with his style and bow before one to whom I am a lowly padiwan-learner in the vituperative arts. :) In my own defence, perhaps I'm over-sensitive in a day the usually sensible Martin Kettle has been vapouring about the Tories "stealing" the election, and some wannabe Tea Baggers are winding themselves up to "make Athens look small" if they get away with their "coup". (And when it comes to that,

    There's hyperbole, and there's being stupid and vulgar and not at all amusing. Something I've actually been called out on -- and quite justly more often than not -- around these parts.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • Craig Ranapia,

    And when it come to fuck-tarded front page of the day, The Daily Mail really hit the floor and is making good time for the Earth's core.

    Britain was given an election wake-up call today after Greece's battle with massive debt erupted in blood and anarchy.

    Three bank workers died yesterday after a mob protesting against spending cuts set their building ablaze.

    As polling stations around Britain opened at 7am today, latest UK opinion polls suggest David Cameron is within touching distance of achieving a working majority.

    But while polls still pointed to a hung Parliament, economists warned that Britain could ill-afford a period of political uncertainty.

    The need for decisive leadership was underlined by official figures showing the UK's budget shortfall will be the biggest in the EU this year - even overtaking Greece.

    With 'contagion' from Athens threatening to spread through other debt-laden economies, David Cameron made a last-ditch plea to voters to back a strong Tory government.

    I'm truly lost for words, and you all know how seldom that happens.

    North Shore, Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 11614 posts Report Reply

  • recordari,

    Ok, so back to the election. Please.

    Eve of the election: reflections from Election Experts. Suppose London School of Economics and Political Science is not everyone's cup of tea, but rumour has it they know a thing or two. There's lots of poll stuff linked on this page, for those with a statistical bent.

    It can't be too bad. Monica Lewinsky is a graduate.

    AUCKLAND • Since Dec 2009 • 2607 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    here's hyperbole, and there's being stupid and vulgar and not at all amusing. Something I've actually been called out on -- and quite justly more often than not -- around these parts.

    That's a fair enough view, although I'm personally not going to lose sleep when someone says something vile about The Sun.

    But Graeme's rant about "a new low" for Public Address System that was -- and he seemed to mean this literally -- worse than anything Whaleoil and Wishart had ever done offended me.

    It still does actually, even though I know he just missed the point. But yes, let's move on.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 17941 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    Kind of shit for the people who'd have their businesses and workplaces destroyed. Totally shit for the corpses

    Well, yeah. But also, it wasn't all that good for the 460 British troops killed in Iraq & Afghanistan under Blair/Bush. Or the over 100,000 Iraqis and Afghans *they* killed (pro-rata).

    The British people didn't want a war. (Just like the Iraqis and Afghans). But they got one, largely because they have an electoral system that lets governments discount and ignore public opinion.

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 4209 posts Report Reply

  • Stephen Judd,

    Perhaps we can all be cheered up by reports of strange goings-on at the BNP.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2906 posts Report Reply

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