Cracker by Damian Christie

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Cracker: On the trail, pt 1.

138 Responses

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  • BenWilson, in reply to Danielle,

    Sorry Ben.

    No need. I am curious, though, what your ideal retirement would be, if you had only modest savings. What sort of things would you do?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 8305 posts Report Reply

  • linger,

    @DBC:
    Yet, for a psychopath who can’t even consistently fake the empathy ("nobody'd starve" on "lower wages"), Key seems remarkably popular.
    … Or is there a significant psychopathic voting bloc?
    … Or is this actually an unhelpful way to view all of NZ’s politicians?

    Tokyo • Since Apr 2007 • 870 posts Report Reply

  • DCBCauchi, in reply to linger,

    … Or is this actually an unhelpful way to view all of NZ’s politicians?

    It can be helpful to be unhelpful!

    Since Feb 2011 • 320 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha, in reply to DCBCauchi,

    My guess is that John and Phil acted as one in their refusal to participate if the 'minor' parties were included.

    Key refused. Or should I say, his handlers did.

    Labour refused to stand up to that.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16419 posts Report Reply

  • DCBCauchi, in reply to Sacha,

    Or should I say, his handlers did.

    I also caught Hekia Parata on the news, trying out methods to stop us worrying about broken gas lines and dangerously under-maintained infrastructure. Someone should demand a refund from her media trainer. A woeful performance I thought, particularly the clumsy grimaces that I think were meant to be wry grins.

    Tsk tsk.

    If you presented that as a performance at an art school crit, you’d be savaged. A lesson in what not to do.

    To the pollies: Actions speak louder than words. You've destroyed any trust or respect you once might have had, through shameless cynical self-interest. People are watching, and they're sick of being served up bullshit. Really sick of it.

    Since Feb 2011 • 320 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle, in reply to BenWilson,

    Why, argue on the internet, of course! :)

    (In all seriousness, if I couldn't afford to travel much, I'd probably spend a lot of time catching up on every single great film of the twentieth century. Paddle about on some local beaches. Hang out with some peeps, both related and unrelated. Cook nice things. Try to remember how to read novels. You know, inexpensive bourgie behaviour.)

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3624 posts Report Reply

  • DCBCauchi, in reply to Danielle,

    (In all seriousness, if I couldn’t afford to travel much, I’d probably spend a lot of time catching up on every single great film of the twentieth century. Paddle about on some local beaches. Hang out with some peeps, both related and unrelated. Cook nice things. Try to remember how to read novels. You know, inexpensive bourgie behaviour.)

    How do you spend your time now? Your spare time after paying bills and looking after children? (I'm guessing.)

    Since Feb 2011 • 320 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Yeah, but did we get Labour to listen? Or to tell better lies?

    That's why we elect them. To answer that question.

    Though I'm an active Green member, I am genuinely curious to see how the stable of MPs will perform in Government. I think we deserve that question answered.

    Meanwhile, the current mob are promising to halve benefits. I haven't had time to catch which conditions they're ascribing - no doubt aimed at some bunch who are seen to be morally degenerate - but given how little you have to survive on currently (the level National set things at and Labour maintained), it's pretty sick.

    The People's Republic of … • Since Nov 2006 • 2127 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    I'm also loving the ghost jobs image floating around Facebook at the moment.

    The People's Republic of … • Since Nov 2006 • 2127 posts Report Reply

  • DCBCauchi, in reply to George Darroch,

    Meanwhile, the current mob are promising to halve benefits. I haven’t had time to catch which conditions they’re ascribing – no doubt aimed at some bunch who are seen to be morally degenerate – but given how little you have to survive on currently (the level National set things at and Labour maintained), it’s pretty sick.

    I reckon that’s an election loser right there. Everyone knows someone who’ll be affected, and anyone who cares to can remember the rhetoric around ‘community mental health care’ and its effect on homeless numbers and petty (and even non-petty) crime.

    And if you know someone who works for the Department of Social Warfare on the frontline, or has to deal with those who do, they will tell you all about it.

    Then there’s the Nats’ competent handling of various crises, for the clear benefit of a certain group of people.

    But that doesn’t answer the most important question: who should I vote for?

    I reckon possibly the Radical Maori Party, if anyone. That’s the closest to representing me any political voice comes, but it’s not very close.

    And I really, really don’t think anyone who wants to be a politician should be let anywhere near political power.

    Where's my no confidence vote eh!?

    Since Feb 2011 • 320 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha, in reply to George Darroch,

    loving the ghost jobs image

    brilliant

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16419 posts Report Reply

  • Danielle, in reply to DCBCauchi,

    How do you spend your time now? Your spare time after paying bills and looking after children?

    Pondering my own inadequacies as a socialist-feminist revolutionary, mainly. And sometimes I watch Jersey Shore.

    Charo World. Cuchi-cuchi!… • Since Nov 2006 • 3624 posts Report Reply

  • JacksonP, in reply to Danielle,

    Pondering my own inadequacies as a socialist-feminist revolutionary, mainly. And sometimes I watch Jersey Shore.

    Non sequitur

    One love.

    Whose serve?

    Auckland • Since Mar 2011 • 2117 posts Report Reply

  • DCBCauchi, in reply to Danielle,

    Pondering my own inadequacies

    Yeah well, we all do that! Much better done while relaxing with a pleasant view I reckon.

    Since Feb 2011 • 320 posts Report Reply

  • DeepRed, in reply to DCBCauchi,

    I also caught Hekia Parata on the news, trying out methods to stop us worrying about broken gas lines and dangerously under-maintained infrastructure. Someone should demand a refund from her media trainer. A woeful performance I thought, particularly the clumsy grimaces that I think were meant to be wry grins.

    Seconded. There's a clear difference between 'keep calm & carry on', and 'move along, nothing to see here!'

    The southernmost capital … • Since Nov 2006 • 4135 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Hebe,

    O I do, o how I do-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to DeepRed,

    The only time I’ve met Hekia was at the NZ embassy in Washington. She was capable & charming…I was kind of gobsmacked when I learned she was a conservative. More so by the kind of conservative she had become-*

    The other person I met at that particular embassy do was Annabelle White. It was kind of revelatory that, apparently, I had been the only one to thank her for work at the splendid buffet in the time she spent at the embassy.

    *Parata are distant rellies.

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Damian Christie, in reply to George Darroch,

    voters ranked their first five issues; environment, food prices, schools (2nd equal), hospital care, petrol prices, and people in poverty. These are all issues which the Greens and Labour absolutely own

    Well... that depends on what people think the answers to those issues are, doesn't it? Arguably (very arguably), I could put the environment first, but think the best thing we could do it privatise the whole damn thing so the people take better care of the kakapo they just bought.

    Less arguably, a lot of parents might (and probably do) agree with National Standards, and therefore not Labour's opposition to them. Petrol prices, well, which party wants to ramp up the ETS etc...

    I'm not saying I disagree, but just pointing out that people could theoretically care about most of those things and still happily vote National. And many (at least a plurality) will.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1127 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha, in reply to Damian Christie,

    I could put the environment first

    This was noted in tv coverage as unexpected and unusual. I doubt the high ranking was caused by a tiny splurge of neolib fanbois gagging to privatise the conservation estate.

    However, I agree it may have no bearing whatsoever on whether people vote for Key's tie or Dunne's hair.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16419 posts Report Reply

  • Ana Simkiss,

    Anyone else watching close up? Came perilously close to some actual farking reporting there. But successfully swerved back to spin & bullshit. Infuriating.

    Freemans Bay • Since Nov 2006 • 121 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    I’m not saying I disagree, but just pointing out that people could theoretically care about most of those things and still happily vote National. And many (at least a plurality) will.

    I don't doubt you. I even think that people can feel that Labour would better represent them on most of those issues, and vote otherwise. The divergence between stated and voting policy preference is an observed one, here and internationally and deserves attention (I'm genuinely interested, for a number of reasons). It's more complex than false bloody consciousness.

    The People's Republic of … • Since Nov 2006 • 2127 posts Report Reply

  • Islander, in reply to Damian Christie,

    I could put the environment first, but think the best thing we could do it privatise the whole damn thing so the people take better care of the kakapo they just bought.

    One of the reasons kakapo are now so excruciatingly rare was the decision of private interest groups (aka farmers) to introduce stoats into the central lakes area.
    Farmers are not, as a group, renowned for good environmental decisions: instead of wiping out the bunnies like good little mustelids, they went straight for the throats - and chicks- of the last viable population of kakapo.

    Trust fucking farmers & private interest groups? Yeeeaaahhh, right-

    Big O, Mahitahi, Te Wahi … • Since Feb 2007 • 5643 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha, in reply to George Darroch,

    The divergence between stated and voting policy preference

    especially for the Greens

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 16419 posts Report Reply

  • Damian Christie,

    I'm sorry, was I not sufficiently facetious in suggesting we sell off the kakapo to Messers Fay & Richwhite etc?

    My point, in case people did genuinely miss it, was that list of issues people found important don't necessarily point to a voting preference, it's their solutions to those issues that matter.

    Surely many Nat/Labour/Green/Act voters alike care about high petrol prices, the cost of fruit and veges, even people in poverty. But the Nats supporters would say we need to build the economy, that'll help the poor. The Act voters would say give the rich more money and watch it trickle down, that'll help the poor (and somehow still genuinely believe it). Hone would say how bout we feed the kids, that'll help the poor..., and so on.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1127 posts Report Reply

  • Damian Christie,

    @Islander - I don't know if you've ever seen my show 'Hindsight' (it's on demand, if you do such things down there), I did an episode about Pest Control and discussed how stoats etc were brought in to get rid of rabbits, and likened it to the old lady who swallowed the fly. I then played a clip I discovered from the 70s, where they were talking about introducing into the wild, I kid you not, the Mountain Lion, to help with the deer problem. Check it out if you're interested:

    http://tvnz.co.nz/hindsight/s2-e9-video-4374281

    At the hospital now by the way. Things are progressing slowly.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1127 posts Report Reply

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