Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Just Answer the Question

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  • Russell Brown,

    10/ On taking power, which bureaucrats would you sack? Please provide names and addresses.

    Hadyn.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 19116 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    10/ On taking power, which bureaucrats would you sack? Please provide names and addresses.

    Hadyn.

    Hey I was gonna answer that!

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2081 posts Report Reply

  • 81stcolumn,

    12/ Whose vote are you most interested in buying? Why isn't it mine?,

    Hu Jintao – cos we all chinese now……

    Nawthshaw • Since Nov 2006 • 732 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Good points all, Joanna.

    What if the meat starts to rot over the course of the weeks, and you end up wasting the most tasty person of all because you have to throw it away?

    Well, I was going to pack 'em in snow, or hang them in the fuselage to age nicely.

    then a richly wine-marinated hotpot of winstone

    Obligingly, I believe Winston's been self-marinating from the inside for years now.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4378 posts Report Reply

  • steven crawford,

    Obligingly, I believe Winston's been self-marinating from the inside for years now.

    He's probably a bit salty. I'd start on one of the Greens; the younger one.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2804 posts Report Reply

  • Jeremy Andrew,

    I'd start on one of the Greens; the younger one

    Ain't it a shame Nandor retired...<insert smoked meat/green MP/hash cookie joke here>

    Hamiltron - City of the F… • Since Nov 2006 • 848 posts Report Reply

  • Michael Savidge,

    My favourite thread of the year.

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 319 posts Report Reply

  • Michael Savidge,

    I guess I should contribute too...

    1/ Should stupid people be allowed to vote? If so, who should they vote for?

    Their peers?

    Somewhere near Wellington… • Since Nov 2006 • 319 posts Report Reply

  • linger,

    But the only face-saving answer to 1. is, of course:
    --Why are you asking me?

    Tokyo • Since Apr 2007 • 931 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    1/ Should stupid people be allowed to vote? If so, who should they vote for?

    They already are (See: Bush, George W)

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2081 posts Report Reply

  • linger,

    @hadyn: well, duuuuh :-)

    but it's an "ought" question, not an "is" question...though your observation does raise the more important question:

    1a/ Should stupid people be allowed to run for office?
    ...which potentially has far more impact on yer typical voter(as the optimal outcome "only for comedic value" seems quite hard to guarantee in practice).

    Tokyo • Since Apr 2007 • 931 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    @hadyn: well, duuuuh :-)

    I figured when I was turned away last election, it was because of the "no joke votes" rule.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2081 posts Report Reply

  • Angus Robertson,

    7/ If you had to ban one race from entering New Zealand, which one would it be and why?

    Already done

    Auckland • Since May 2007 • 984 posts Report Reply

  • Che Tibby,

    Do excuse me for not joining in the laughter, won't you.

    @stephen come now, you missed a great opening there.

    7/ If you had to ban one race from entering New Zealand, which one would it be and why?

    when they came for the gingas, i was silent...

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2026 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,

    Ah yes gingas; the world’s only true minority.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • Hadyn Green,

    Ah yes gingas; the world’s only true minority.

    Haven't my people suffered enough?

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2081 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Ah yes gingas; the world’s only true minority.

    Haven't my people suffered enough?

    Only your men. Your women remain highly prized.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4378 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Hosking,

    a) When you've got a bottle of really great wine and a bottle of crap wine, you drink the good one first so that you're a little bit drunk by the time you get to the other one and it therefore tastes better

    Which raises a very important question I'm surprised hasn't yet been raised: this plane crash - are we in economy class or business/first class? Because if the latter, you can get a decent wine to go with the meal, perhaps even a good whisky to kick the meal off with. After which, it won't matter what order the pollies get eaten in.

    South Roseneath • Since Nov 2006 • 805 posts Report Reply

  • Che Tibby,

    Only your men. Your women remain highly prized.

    this emma, she speaks the truth.

    the back of an envelope • Since Nov 2006 • 2026 posts Report Reply

  • Rob Hosking,

    2/ If you were secretly an Arab terrorist, what would be the first policy you’d enact on taking office?

    I think the key word here is 'secretly'. If a sort of Levantine Manchurian Candidate - a Syrian Candidate?? - did get elected to office and immediately banned lending at interest; ordered all women to wear burquas; and declared a fatwa on all television programmes it might kind of make people suspicious.

    What he'd be best advised to do would be form an alliance with one or more of the Christian parties and offer them the roles of, ooh, lets see now, ministers of finance, health and corrections.

    Get out of that one, smegheads.

    South Roseneath • Since Nov 2006 • 805 posts Report Reply

  • steven crawford,

    I'd just like to retract my earlier statement regarding survival cannibalism. I now realize that it was not politically correct.

    This message was authorizer by: Ivan Gleek, 27 Gurnard road, Gore.

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 2804 posts Report Reply

  • richard,

    Personally, I would like to see Graham Capill (but surely he is still in prison?) seated next to Garth McVicar.

    But I would put both of them on the Andes-bound plane, rather than the dinner party.

    Not looking for New Engla… • Since Nov 2006 • 260 posts Report Reply

  • LegBreak,

    I'd put Capill next to Te Rauparaha

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 1162 posts Report Reply

  • 81stcolumn,

    2/ If you were secretly an Arab terrorist, what would be the first policy you’d enact on taking office?

    The same as a tibetan one - who's asking ?

    Nawthshaw • Since Nov 2006 • 732 posts Report Reply

  • Rich of Observationz,

    1/ Should stupid people be allowed to vote? If so, who should they vote for?

    Peter Dunne.

    2/ If you were secretly an Arab terrorist, what would be the first policy you'd enact on taking office?

    Send paramilitary cops against some of NZ's nuttier Maori and other agitators, abolish Maori seats and try and forcibly suppress the gangs.

    5/ You are holding a dinner party for famous New Zealand political and historical personages. Who do you seat next to Graham Capill?

    Antoine Dixon

    8/ Which gay MP would you least like to have babysit your children?

    Stephen Franks

    10/ On taking power, which bureaucrats would you sack? Please provide names and addresses.

    All the staff of Censorship, Police, Immigration and Customs.

    13/ Without going outside to check, what make is your ministerial car?

    Bugatti Veyron - If it isn't now, its gonna be soon

    15/ Who is your favourite New Zealand band? Prove it by posting a youtube clip of you singing one of their songs.

    Courtenay Love. And no.

    16/ Name three prominent New Zealand bloggers. Which one would you most like to punch in the face?

    Whaleoil - lowered feed first through shredding machine rather than punched in the face.
    That stupid lawyer woman who lives in Hong Kong - left in South Auckland at 2am with no phone or money rather than punched in face.
    Farrar - locked in a small room with five of his commentors rather than punched in face.

    17/ How much did a one kilo block of Anchor cheese cost at Pak 'n' Save Moorhouse Ave last Tuesday?

    No idea - shall I'll enquire of the under-cook?

    Back in Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 4501 posts Report Reply

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