Up Front by Emma Hart

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Up Front: Oh, Cock!

169 Responses

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  • sally jones,

    "elbow skin pendants"

    Shakespeare, is it?

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 179 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    But vagazling (I have NO idea how to spell that)

    Vajazzling.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22744 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Really it's just another dangly wobbly bit - to go with all the other dangly wobbly bits - sadly there are more of those each year

    I'd have to say I like my penis a lot more than any other dangly-wobbly bit I might possess.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22744 posts Report Reply

  • uroskin,

    Dudes, can we take it back to the thing in hand?

    Waiheke Island • Since Feb 2007 • 178 posts Report Reply

  • Ian Dalziel,

    Cleavin' Bacon... and Tudor Grease!

    Shakespeare, is it?

    Ooooer, Ooor Wully!!


    ...some say it's your mind!

    I'd have to say I like my penis a lot more than any other dangly-wobbly bit I might possess.

    do we need Jung or don't
    we mention tongue?

    Christchurch • Since Dec 2006 • 7885 posts Report Reply

  • Bart Janssen,

    Vajazzling.

    vajazzhands?

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 4450 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    vajazzhands?

    Actually LOLed.

    Also, allow me to continue to promote this tumblr - unbelievably NSFW, contains explicit sexual material. And smiling, and joy, and fun, and wonder. It is, like pretty much everything this sex-positive, disproportionately LGBT/kinky.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Russell Brown,

    Also, allow me to continue to promote this tumblr - unbelievably NSFW, contains explicit sexual material. And smiling, and joy, and fun, and wonder. It is, like pretty much everything this sex-positive, disproportionately LGBT/kinky.

    Warm-hearted erotic tumblr blogs are the shizzle.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 22744 posts Report Reply

  • Andre Alessi,

    I've certainly known guys to sit around speculating upon the elasticity of certain mutual female aquantences' genitalia. All in jest, of course-noone wants to admit to another man that a given love tunnel didn't feel tight enough, because that inevitably leads to the suspicion that the cause was not a cavernous vagina but rather an inadequately girthy member.

    Devonport, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 864 posts Report Reply

  • Jeremy Eade,

    sex is not the enemy,cool site, i like it.

    Katharine Hepburn as Amazon warrior princess Antiope , yep.

    auckland • Since Mar 2008 • 1112 posts Report Reply

  • Emma Hart,

    Katharine Hepburn as Amazon warrior princess Antiope , yep.

    Oh Hell Yes.

    An ex-co-worker of mine once likened me to Katharine Hepburn. She meant it as a slight. It's one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me.

    Christchurch • Since Nov 2006 • 4650 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    tumblr blogs are the shizzle.

    In the sense that they shit around without loading, yes. My browser hates em for some reason.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19680 posts Report Reply

  • John Fouhy,

    It's such a powerful symbol of sexist oppression and dominance that so is anything it lends its shape to: missiles, spears, the CN tower.

    Can I just say that I was slightly amused to learn the other day that the Swiss were celebrating reclaiming the "longest tunnel in the world" crown..

    Wellington • Since Nov 2006 • 87 posts Report Reply

  • Andre Alessi,

    In the sense that they shit around without loading, yes. My browser hates em for some reason.

    It's usually the Javascript associated with some themes. If you have NoScript, try temporarily allowing scripts from the URL to see if that makes a difference.

    Devonport, New Zealand • Since Nov 2006 • 864 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    I think penises are like dogs. There's all sizes and shapes, hard to believe sometimes that they're actually the same species.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10629 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    Can I just say that I was slightly amused to learn the other day that the Swiss were celebrating reclaiming the "longest tunnel in the world" crown..

    Our tunnel is so long you can jam through it at 250kmh, and it will still take 12 minutes to finish.

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10629 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    No. And although it's very sweet of Emma to write a blog post to help us feel better about our cocks, I think most guys are on good terms with theirs.

    "Attached" I think the term is.

    And Sally.....we've been waiting......you're late.

    As an incomplete I blame my father. Also, he insisted that I dress to the left and have ended up with it bent.

    Thankfully it still seems to fuction.


    Sigh.

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1588 posts Report Reply

  • Sacha,

    If you have NoScript, try temporarily allowing scripts from the URL to see if that makes a difference

    Yes, did that when it first happened - must be screwing with something below that configurable level.

    Ak • Since May 2008 • 19680 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    Heh

    I knew I could find a funny.

    A very old R. Harris Esq with Chuck Berry

    Free Country you know.....

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1588 posts Report Reply

  • sally jones,

    Ross: I am forever waiting too. Forever late, late, for a very important date. To which specific lateness do you refer?

    Is it still fuctioning? Sounds painful

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 179 posts Report Reply

  • Ross Mason,

    Late to the post.

    No n to it.

    Upper Hutt • Since Jun 2007 • 1588 posts Report Reply

  • sally jones,

    Yes, sorry about that. The matter was taken out of my hands last week. I believe it is due tomorrow.
    I feel obliged to notify you and anyone else who may be interested, that there are no penises in this next piece. I didn't want to be typecast.
    I hope you, Ross, and others, expecting penises, are not too disappointed.
    Promises of more penises in the future,
    SJ

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 179 posts Report Reply

  • sally jones,

    And I'm afraid that's it for me before I shrivel up into a pumpkin.

    Hope there are some men out there making the dinner...

    Auckland • Since Sep 2010 • 179 posts Report Reply

  • George Darroch,

    Our tunnel is so long you can jam through it at 250kmh, and it will still take 12 minutes to finish.

    They also have a tunnel that something very tiny travels through at the speed of light, which causes an earth-shattering explosion that reveals the secrets of the universe.

    WLG • Since Nov 2006 • 2264 posts Report Reply

  • BenWilson,

    They also have a tunnel that something very tiny travels through at the speed of light, which causes an earth-shattering explosion that reveals the secrets of the universe.

    Or destroys it! How much more climactic can you get!

    Auckland • Since Nov 2006 • 10629 posts Report Reply

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